Survival Of The Fittest

"Okay… Three… Two…" Jeremy prepared himself to run, trying to figure out how to actually prepare himself to run. He was just trying to copy Nathan, for the most part, crouching down in preparation for the inevitable charge. Would this actually help, though? He remembered seeing the Olympic runners crouching down before the blank fired, but he doubted that getting up would provide an actual boost. Eh, if the Olympic athletes were doing it he supposed that there was some basis in fact. "On-"

And then Michael Crowe and… Jonathan (?) entered the scene.

"Oh fuck me."

They weren't going to side with him, he knew that. Jeremy never really liked Michael that much. Sure, they both played video games and he was a decent enough dude, but he was kind of a massive fucking jackass and Jeremy didn't really like associating with massive fucking jackasses that much. Plus, he was pretty good buddies with Darius so it wasn't really a leap at all if he sided with Darius. He didn't know much about Jonathan but he and Michael were buddies, so he'd go where Michael would go. Michael would go with Darius, Jonathan would go with Darius.

Which meant that this was going to be a three on two battle.

"Okay, new plan, let's take out the new people before they overwhelm us." He stood up, clutching his snowball in his hands, before pegging it as hard as he could at Jonathan.

Well, that all went pear-shaped quickly. Unknown factors in the form of some other Cochise kids made themselves known before Nathan and Jeremy could carry out their plan, leaving them scrambling. Jeremy sounded irritated, but Nathan tried to shrug it off. He nodded again, before rising from his crouch and darting to the side, allowing him to throw his snowball at the opposite side of the car from where Jeremy had targeted.

Michael Crowe and... that one junior kid who was usually tagging along with him. Jon, or something. Nathan didn't keep firm track of his classmates outside of his friend circle and the people he had classes with. He didn't bother trying to stop and figure out why they'd suddenly decided to join in the fight or why they were siding with Darius; stopping now probably meant a snowball to the face.

His legs were really starting to ache now as he bent to quickly pack together another snowball. He'd have to be careful about stretching when he finally got home so that he didn't pull a muscle. Keeping that in mind, he moved a few careful steps back, waiting with snowball in hand for one of his opponents behind the car to show themselves again.

Michael and Jonathan came, that was nice. Well, as long the two of them were not intending to hit him. Because, honestly, Darius would definitely not like a snowball to the face by Michael Crowe. It probably would be a boxing-punch in comparison to the sock-ball-throws Frasier does.

When Jonathan went to his hiding spot behind the car and asked him whether he'd mind them helping him, he replied:

"Sure! Otherwise it would've been a bit unfair."

And then he saw how Jeremy tried to hit Jonathan with a snowball. Darius' reaction was to turn away from Jonathan in case Jeremy actually managed to hit. He didn't want to get exploding snowball fragments to the face.

Michael, realizing he had been spotted,(even though he wasn't really being sneaky in the first place) decided to change his tactic up a bit, and went for a full rush to the car. Michael prepped his snowball for flight as he ran, looking for his targets. While he intended to hit Nathan for being out in the open, he saw Jeremy pop out and lob his snowball towards Jonathan. Michael decided that a non-moving target's easier than a moving target, so he changed his plans accordingly, tossing his arm-propelled ice ball towards Jeremy like a pitcher would toss a baseball. He'd follow through his sprint and toss with a trashy Ric Flair impersonation, before getting cut off by an unforeseen consequence.

"WOOOOo-Ah! AaAh! Ah fuck!" Michael's feet slipped out from under him, his expensive Jordans not coping too well with the snow. He toppled forward, putting his arms in front of him to soften the fall. He didn't want to mess up his face after all, it was his best feature, next to his Man Who Fell to Earth haircut of course. He scrambled to get up, clawing at the ground for some traction, his feet slipping on the ice as he struggled to regain his momentum. He finally managed to push himself forward, scooping up a handful of snow on the way to the car, hoping not to catch a cold wad of frost to the face on route from point A to point B.

Jonathan realized that he shouldn't have peeked out from behind the car. All it rewarded him with was a snowball right in his face and he toppled over backwards. Wow..... Jeremy got him good. He hadn't expected the guy's aim to be so good. He couldn't help but grin excitedly. This was a great time to try to catch one of the other boys off guard. Now he just had to sit up to get back into the game.

He sit up slowly and he set his snowball down beside him. He wiped the snow off of his face with his gloves and he glanced over at Darius. Heh. Darius only had some of the snow on his arm. He was lucky that he didn't get it to the face instead of Jonathan.

"Well, that was pretty cool. He got me! Ha ha! Now it's time for a little payback!"

As Jonathan turned his attention back to what the others were doing, he tried to hold back a laugh as he could see Michael slipping and sliding all over the place. It was a funny sight to see. He picked his snowball back up as Michael was still trying to make his way over to them. Jonathan had to focus on the others now. He wanted to at least hit Jeremy or Nathan with his snowball. Otherwise, it would be no fun at all.

Jonathan let out a small breath and he risked peeking over the car again. No one was throwing anything. And Jeremy was standing up. Out in the open. Good!

"Hi, Jeremy!" He smiled coolly as he threw the snowball in his direction before crouching back down. He was hoping that it would hit Jeremy. It would be a great payback for the snowball-to-the-face that he got from him.

Holy shit, right in the face. Jonathan, or whatever his name was, toppled backwards onto the ground. He somehow aimed that perfectly. Maybe throwing things was something he was actually good at. He stared down at his hand for a bit. Maybe next athletics carnival he should give discus or shot put a try.

He then remembered that he was in the middle of a snowball fight, and ducked down behind the fire hydrant. A snowball wizzed straight past above his head, followed by another one hitting the fire hydrant. Ha. Being outnumbered didn't seem to meet anything if you were smarter than your opponent.

Although being outnumbered was definitely a problem, since he'd likely get hit if he broke out of cover. He grabbed a clump of snow beside the fire hydrant and crushed it in his hands, preparing for the next strike. He'd probably have to hit or run. Go up, throw, and then go back behind the fire hydrant. That was the only real way he could get out of this alive. If he lingered for even a moment he'd likely get hit by one or multiple of Darius, Michael, or…

Jonathan? That sounded right, he knew that there was a Jonathan in the junior year but he could be wrong. He didn't really care to memorise the names of the juniors much, unless they were people he liked. He could name Irene pretty easily, but other people....

"Hey, kid who's not Darius or Michael, what's your name? I actually don't know." ...Okay that sounded really silly and dumb, but he didn't want to really have to strain his head whenever he tried to name the other group.

He looked around, Nathan was a little back preparing a snowball. Jeremy nodded at him, showing him his snowball.

Nathan returned Jeremy's nod, trying and failing to suppress a grin at the antics he could hear taking place behind the car. Outnumbered or no, their opponents weren't exactly a well-oiled fighting machine.

He gave his snowball one last pat to firm it up, and then let it fly once a target presented itself. At least his arms weren't too sore to throw well, unlike his protesting legs.

"It's Jonathan!", Darius shouted to Jeremy, after he wiped the snow off his clothes. Oh, and Michael fell. Ouch.

Darius picked up another snowball. Geez, how could Jeremy forget Jonathan's name? How long was Jeremy in the same school as Jonathan? Darius didn't need to be a social butterfly to remember names.

"Forgetting names, Jesus Christ. Whoever shat into your brain, Jeremy, that person must've been secretly an elephant!"

Then, he threw his snowball over the car to the direction of Jeremy.

"Uh, what's your name again, uh, Frasier? Guy who isn't Nathan, Michael, Jonathan or Darius? Geronimo Frasier? Am I right?", Darius said with a laughing voice.

"AaAaAAaah! Sonuva bitch!" Michael continued to slip and stumble his way to the car, with all the grace of a hospitalized vegetable on ice. At this point, he left his dignity somewhere five feet behind him, so he just decided to fall on his knees and slide the rest of the way to the car.

The lack of protection Michael had from his torn jeans ensured one hell of a road rash as he reached the car with a thump. He turned around, leaning his back against it to rub his sore, red knees. A combination of a laugh and a groan came from him. "Ahaahaoow fuck man, d-dis fuckin' ice is kickin' my ass more than anyone back at the school ever could, aheh..." He picked up a large wad of snow off the ground, having dropped his previous snowball in the terrible attempt at imitating a penguin with his legs.

He turned around the car to get a better look at Jeremy's cover, only for an explosion of snow to hit right in front of him.  Oh shit! He forgot about Nathan! Michael ducked in reflex to the snowball, before standing back up and tossing his snowball towards Nathan. Again he'd toss the ice wad like his life depended on it, still somewhat pissed off from sliding around like a jackass.

Jonathan tilted his head to the side slightly. He was surprised that Jeremy didn't even know his name. That was really.... weird. Oh, well. It wasn't really a big deal. When he opened to his mouth to tell Jeremy his name.... Darius beat him to the punch. And then he started to crack a joke. Jonathan felt a bit embarrassed but he felt himself let out a small chuckle.

He then saw an opening to get Jeremy and he smirked. Revenge will be his! He stood up quickly and he chucked a snowball as fast as he could at Jeremy. Then it actually managed to hit his target! Ha! He did it! He then remembered that Nathan was still also throwing some snowballs as well. He managed to duck back down before any of them could hit him and he sighed in relief.

"That was too close! But at least I finally got that guy! Heh...."

...Jesus, Darius was terrible at telling jokes. Jeremy knew that what he said was stupid but saying that an elephant shat into his brain was neither creative or funny. He'd probably find people saying that if he was playing Call of Duty or something like that; they were the kind of insults that a twelve year old would give. Was Darius actually twelve years old? Probably not, but he had the maturity of one. He was probably the person who thought that just saying XDDDDDDDD 420 MEMES LOLLLLLLLLL repeatedly made them a comedic genius.

Which kinda made it important that Jeremy made a good enough comeback to this. If he somehow lost to a joke that terrible, he would never be able to call himself a good comedian ever again. He needed to make people laugh.

Eh, if Darius thought what he just said was funny he'd probably laugh if he said the same thing again. He was probably that predictable. He rose up above the fire hydrant and put his hand next to his mouth, gesturing to Darius.

"Gee, your jokes, Darius. Whoever shat into your brain and gave you your sense of humour, that person must have secretly been an ele- MMMMMMPH." A snowball hit him straight in the face and knocked him back. He fell back on his hands again. The snow on his face kinda felt unpleasant, but they were probably going to laugh at that. Whoever threw that snowball had really good comedic timing.

"Nice shot!" He shouted out to nobody in particular. That'd teach him not to get cocky, at least.

What on Earth were Darius and Jeremy talking about now? Nathan was only half-listening, instead directing his attention towards packing more snowballs as quickly as possible. Jonathan had surprisingly good aim; the unexpected threat left Nathan torn between focusing on him or Mike. Darius and Jeremy seemed pretty well occupied by each other for the time being.

Another snowball grazing his arm made the decision for him, and he lobbed the snowball in his hand back towards Michael. The three of them hiding behind the car while he and Jeremy were left out in the open was starting to turn the tide of things, it seemed. His and Jeremy's advantage had been more or less eliminated by now. Maybe the time for a truce was drawing near.

When Jeremy attempted to deliver a comeback to Darius, he was interrupted. Darius was curious about what made him stop talking. When he looked over the car he saw that Jeremy fell down. Again.

Loser.

Darius took another snowball when leaving his hiding spot behind the car and walked toward the guy who wasn't able to keep his balance. With the snowball, Darius threw it to the laying Frasier.

Michael tossed his snowball, but before he could see it hit, he heard Jeremy badly repeat a phrase then... stop? Michael turned his head to see the snowball knock Jeremy on his back. Get rekt son! Michael found himself lapsing into his trademark hyena laugh as Jonathan's snowball hit it's mark. He lowers his head over the car, laughing hard enough that tears were forming in his eyes. He raised his head only to see Darius casually walk up to Frasier, and toss another snowball at the prone nerd.

This caused Michael to hunch back over the car, and laugh even harder. He didn't even see Nathan's snowball coming. "Aiiihee haha! Ahaheha! Ho-holy sh-shit aiha aheh! I can't- I can't fucking breath! Right in 'da fuckin-" The snowball smacked him in the side of the head with a wet *plap*. A long pause...

"Da fuck?"

His laughing stopped immediately. The moment he takes his eyes off of Nathan, he gets got right in the ear with a snowball. Dammit. He quickly grabs another pile of snow off the car and begins folding it up into another snow based projectile.

Before tossing it, he'd glance at Jeremy again, chuckling. Michael quickly turned his attention back to Nathan and fired.

Jonathan smiled and he shook his head at his friends having a good time. It looked like Darius was owning Jeremy right now. Oh, well. His victory had been short-lived. But it had been worth it. Michael was laughing like crazy beside him before he got hit by a snowball. Nathan sure did get him good. Jonathan felt himself snickering.

"Ha, ha. That was a good one. I think we should wrap up this snowball fight soon."

He was sure that he was going to be home late and his mom would yell at him because she was such a worrier. It really sucked that she worries about him too much. He was fine. He wasn't going to get hurt. Again....

He shook his head again. Then he slowly stood up from behind the car, making sure not to slip on the snow. "Hey, guys! How about we call a truce?" He offered to the others with a bright smile. He was hoping not to get another snowball to the face again. Now that would suck even more than his mom shouting at him.