Survival Of The Fittest

“Maybe,” Zach said softly, “Maybe I should have.”

What Sean said was probably true. Maybe Zach shouldn’t have wussed out and ran off the way he did. Maybe he wouldn’t have had that nightmare of a zombified Brandon if he owned up to his murder of Bree days prior.

“I was afraid,” Zach continued, “Afraid that you’d think less of me. That you’d distrust me. That you’d kill me.”

Tears rolled down his cheeks as he confided in Sean. He wrapped his arms around his own body, trying to keep himself together.

“God, this is all so FUCKED!,” Zach shouted, his voice cracking again.

Through the tears and explanations, Zach made a pitiful display of himself, a person who had seemingly bungled his way into two deaths and no friends. Thomas did not doubt that Zach meant the things he was saying, he was no actor and this would be quite the performance to pull off.

And yet, Thomas felt unmoved

Asshole.

It wasn’t that Zach’s plight wasn’t sympathetic, it certainly was, but that didn’t change the fact that Zach remained a danger in his own way. Someone who attracted problems like that, seemingly drawn to conflict like a moth to a flame, wasn’t someone that Thomas wanted to stick around.

You’re seriously going to brush him off for making mistakes? After what you just did?

No, there was a difference between himself and Zach, a fine one, but a difference nonetheless. Beyond the matter of no one actually dying, Thomas had acted on instinct against an armed, known killer in order to protect the people he cared about.

And didn’t Zach say that he was defending people too?

Yes, but.. but Zach was an abrasive prick. He’d rubbed Thomas the wrong way all the way back at the infirmary. Who was to say that Zach hadn’t escalated things with Brandon, hell even back to the lighthouse? Upon seeing the standoff between Thomas and Violet, Zach had quickly turned to stepping in and actively making things more stressful.

And… and just being an abrasive prick didn’t warrant getting cut off in reality. But this wasn’t reality, it was a twisted nightmare construction that Thomas had been allowed some ignorance of, because he was with good people that he could trust and cared about and Zach was a liability that could ruin all of that because of course Sean and Sakurako would want to help him out because he was clearly suffering and he was Sean’s friend, but Zach would definitely put all of them at risk with his attitude that he still had clearly not learned to ditch, but Thomas couldn’t say any of that out loud because if he did then he’d sound cruel and paranoid and maybe that’d just make Sakurako and Sean more determined to help Zach, and Thomas didn’t know where this was going anymore.

Thomas cleared his throat but didn’t say anything, an attempt to clear out some of his own tension as Sean and Zach spoke, frustrated that he, Sakurako, and Sean couldn’t just go back to sitting back and talking about nothing too important, as they had only minutes ago.

His gaze travelled over towards Sakurako, expression apologetic, though again he no words came out. What was he sorry for? Still the Violet business? His private thoughts, fears? He wouldn’t have known where to start if he did speak.

So he didn’t.

This whole thing, situation, mess. Whatever one wants to call it, it smelled of irony. The one time Zach manages to be honest with him. No bullshit, no charade or acting in sight is the time Sean couldn't. A frown appeared on his face as he listened to Zach's explanation and he found himself yelling at him response.

"C'mon man, you should have known me better than that!" Sure, it has passed his mind at times, but those times made his stomach tie itself a knot and his throat dry up like a desert. Them sitting here and talking about crushes and shit had made it go away, but these arrivals kept reminding him of the "game". Of the consequences.

"I don't trust you, especially not after you ran off. But I would never kill you. Fuck that!" The display in front of him and the one earlier from Violet told him everything he needed to know after you start doing these kinds of things. It messes with you fundamentally, soon, you wouldn't be the same person. Not even close.

They were just lucky they hadn't found anyone that had started to enjoy themselves. There had been stories of people getting so lost that whatever came out was barely human. Like a chameleon in human skin that eroded it's disguise once it awakened.

It was all sick and wrong. He shouldn't have to think this way about his friends, about his classmates. And yet, here he was with that all too familiar knot letting itself be known.

He turned to look at his friends, the ones who had been with him this entire time. Let him forget this nonsense and be himself, if only for a bit. But neither had anything to say it seemed. Not to Zach anyway.

Thomas had turned to look at her. He was the lucky one out of them. Since he woke up and out of everyone he'd met, Thomas had everything. A gun, a group, a plan. And Sakurako who looked to be willing to drag him back if he started to lose himself.

It would be a lie to say Sean didn't envy that. He had a shitty fruit stinking up the place. Violet didn't feel the same way and...had changed. His friends were losing it, one in front of him. He had been useless so far.

That needed to change.

He quickly turned his head back to Zach. There had to be drastic action for Sean to trust him again. Whether or not he would do it was up to him.

"The gun...You still have it?" He hoped that he would.

Zach looked up at Sean. He was asking for the gun he used on Brandon. He was asking for one of his only means of defense. Zach still had the billhook in his bag. As far as Sean knew, Zach only had the one weapon. He had given the only other weapon he had to Lucas Diaz.

Zach hesitated. Was this was a test of faith? Did Sean think Zach wanted to rejoin their group? Zach had planned to stick it out on his own. Now Sean was giving him a chance, a chance Zach hadn’t sought out. At least, not originally. No matter where Zach went, he’d be attracted to danger, or vice versa. The incident with Brandon, the encounter with Michael, in the end, someone ended up shot. How long before Zach himself wound up being shot?

Sean, his friend, was offering him a second chance. Though Zach felt he didn’t deserve it. But still, Zach also felt lonely. It had just been himself for the past few days. He’d been fairing better than he expected, but how much of that was by luck and not skill? Did Zach truly want to keep going like this? It’s only a matter of time before his luck ran out.

Zach opened up his bag, and pulled out the gun he’d been carrying all this time. He held it up to Sean like a birthday present.

“Here,” Zach said, “just, be careful with it.”

Sean tried it.

Violet denied it.

Zach... supplied it!?!

Sean stood there frozen as a gun was pulled out and held out in front of him. He hadn't expected it to work the way it has. He expected Zach to turn back to how he was normally, refuse and leave, but instead. There it was. And he seemed real earnest about it in a way Sean hadn't seen him before.

He was really trying. A small part of him believed and that belief had been rewarded.

"Thank you." His voice went soft, any harshness leaving as relief set in and his hands cupped together underneath as a gun was placed on them. He stared at it, fascinated by it. This wasn't just a handgun. It was something more than that.

Is this how Thomas felt every time he held one in his hands?

It was a symbol of power now. A symbol of control. Having one this entire time had made them somewhat safe, but not enough to stop people from trying. Now they had two.

He balanced the weight of it over to his left hand as he moved his right to get a hold of the the handle. Once he did and making sure not to aimed at anyone, he levelled it towards the ground and looked at Zach again.

It was a step forward for them both. Change could happen.

"Y'know, Zach....I meant what I said back then." He reached out with his left hand looking for a handshake. A small smile finding it's way to his face.

It was a start.

Sean placed the gun on the ground. Was he just gonna leave it there? Zach was sure Sean would just take, for security or some shit. Still, at least Sean wasn’t pissed enough at Zach to shoot him up.

You know, you just let him put a collar around your neck.

Whatever Zach was thinking, he tried to push to the back of his mind. He still had the billhook. So he wasn’t completely defenseless. Zach needed Sean’s trust. Whatever it took, he needed the extra insurance.

"Y'know, Zach....I meant what I said back then,” Sean said.

“You mean, back at the infirmary?”, Zach asked, “About us being friends?”

Everything was… fine?

Sean was being extremely accepting considering the situation. Absurdly accepting, even. Thomas understood that Sean and Zach were close and all and that this moment was a meaningful moment of reconciliation for them, but it was ringing a lot of alarm bells on a practicality level.

Was Zach just going to be sticking with them from here on, a nagging worry that Thomas would have to just try to ignore from then on?

What else would you do? Step in, make it clear that you don’t want Zach sticking around?

No, it was too late for that. If he wanted to stop their group from getting wrapped up in Zach-related messes, he should have spoken up earlier. With all the sympathy and forgiveness in the air, it wasn’t down to Thomas, even if he was right.

For the time being, he’d have to internally consider Sean the Official Secretary of All Zach-Related Business. He’d be hands off. Take it easy. Let it go. He could do that.

Thomas thought to explain to Zach that they’d be sticking around the cliffs until the next day, but he decided to leave such an offer/explanation to Sean. It would fall under his purview, after all.

“Should we, uh, give them some space?” Thomas whispered to Sakurako. It was all he could think to say, starting to feel a little voyeuristic now as the two of them wordlessly watched two people have an intensely personal conversation that Thomas had no intention of joining.

"Hopefully they don't ditch us, but space should be fine?"

Okay, it was a stage whisper. But as happy as she was for Sean, she didn't know if Zach would throw off their merry band. Not to mention The Plan, or what Aditi would say. Something rude, but with the added gun she'd get over it. Charelle could help smooth it over too, in her way. She just had to keep in mind that this wasn't her and Thomas being left behind, it was one more person potentially joining them in an alliance. No need to worry except...

The potential impending death for rule-breaking floated in her mind, daring her to mention it to the newcomer. But the guy'd just stopped being borderline hysterical, and she didn't really want to see that again. Feeling such sympathy for a killer felt icky in a way, but she couldn't help it.

The fuckups, the monsters, they'd all been her classmates for four years. How did you throw all that away?

She didn't want to know and for now, it didn't matter. Shaking her head at the turn her thoughts had taken, Sakurako gave Sean and Zach two thumbs up. Her grin was wild, way too playful for gun talks and death games.

"Well, if you're gonna roll with us... welcome to the motherfucking Clout Gang!"

So, the motherfucking clout gang. It hadn't been as easy as before, but some time later they'd managed to get the vibe down to a moderate tension. If they were ever going to talk about George Hunter and its denizens in a way that wasn't about the game, she didn't know. But the sun was going down, which meant showtime was soon.

Her watch still worked, marked time. She could hear the wildlife, everything settling in the the evening. They'd all sheltered themselves the best they could on a cliff, which was not very well at all. Better than someone rolling off in their sleep.

Her eyes searched for a fire, even as they grew weary. She might have looked for hours. She couldn't tell anymore.

She couldn't sleep, couldn't take a walk, couldn't do much of anything but look at Thomas through squinted eyes. He was starting to grow scruff, unless her glasses had finally given up on her. How long had they been friends, now? Was she just using him for comfort, accepting warmth where she could find it? That's not what it felt like.

Not seeing any evidence the girls started a flame, she decided to stoke other embers.

When she finally slept, it was in a heavenly peace despite the ache in her leg. When the start of the morning announcements caught her awake and unable to ignore it...

"Yeah, I'm not throwing you away." The gun was safely on the ground, away from anyone's hands. It was best to keep the temptation out. Zach had already shown him that he was somehow above it. Was it the guilt eating away making the choice easier for him? Weighing him down like an anchor.

Sean didn't want to imagine what that felt like, the closest he could was when he held Desiree in his arms after she'd died. He didn't killer her, but her blood had been on his hands for a day later before he washed it away. It didn't stop the feeling that it was still there and how helpless he was at that time.

But still, it was too different. He couldn't compare.

All Sean could do was hold Zach by the hand and try to get his friend back. And it seemed to be working.

He looked back to his friends. It was a nervous one over their reactions. He knew Thomas wasn't exactly thrilled over Zach, but Sakurako welcomed him to the gang. It made Sean smile at her and he kept it as he turned back to his friend.

He had a good feeling about this.

Sean managed to sleep well that night. The previous nights hadn't been a picnic for him, but with the previous days events behind there was a sense of comfort as he relaxed down. Even with the announcements blaring worse than his alarm at home to wake him with some bad news.

Sean’s word filled Zach with a sense of relief. He wiped his eyes of the tears he shed, and hesitantly took Sean’s hand. Not that Zach thought it was embarrassing, but rather due to the lingering guilt he felt for abandoning his friend. Sean really was a bro for giving Zach’s pathetic ass a second chance.

As they walked towards the others, Zach glanced back at the gun they left on the ground.

You sure you’re not making a fucking stupid mistake?

Zach had made minced meat out of someone with that thing. If anything, perhaps setting that gun down was a way for him to stop this lone wolf survivor strategy. Not like it worked, as Zach found trouble wherever he went, whether it came to him or he came to it.

Sean and Sakurako were welcoming, but he wasn’t sure about Thomas. He seemed the most distrustful of the three. Not that Zach blamed him. Well, fuck it. It’s not like it mattered anymore. However long this game would last, they were all dead anyway.
__________________________________________________

That night, Zach’s slumber was disturbed once more by zombie Brandon. He was standing over Zach as Zach lied still. Zach stared at the walking corpse of his victim, looking into his cold, blank eyes. Brandon opened his mouth, but only faint sounds came out. Zach could just barely make out the words. Upon repeating himself several times, Brandon’s message became clear.

You can’t run from what you did.

Zach looked over to his left and saw a couple of familiar figures. It was his parents. They stared at Zach with disappointment in their eyes. A wave of anxiety washed over Zach for the rest of the night.

When Zach awoke the next morning, he was relieved by the sound of the announcements.

It was official, then. Zach would be joining their group, at least for the time being.

Thomas wasn’t happy with it, but he’d already resolved to let this one go. Still, he failed to give the same warm welcome provided by Sean and Sakurako. He wasn’t going to pretend that this was his ideal scenario or that he was suddenly cool with Zach, that would have been shitty in its own way.

The rest of the day went comparatively smoothly as evening came over them and Thomas’s nerves returned. Charelle and Aditi had still not joined them, but their collars remained intact. Had they not started the fire yet? What was holding them up?

It was nigh impossible to sleep like that, knowing that something was very wrong and yet being denied the knowledge of what that something was.

Sakurako lay beside him, seemingly getting little rest herself, and yet she seemed so much more put-together than he felt. It was frustrating, the idea that she need not take these matters as seriously as he did, that she was frequently able to let things roll off of her back in a way he couldn’t.

Maybe that was the better way to be, though. Keeping free of paranoia, doing more to try to help people than running around constantly on the defensive was at the very least a more hopeful path, though.

Maybe it was, like, a balance between them. Like, pragmatism and optimism?

Where the hell are you even going with this?

He didn’t know. Fuck, he was just really tired. It was all just gibberish.

It was Sakurako who eventually managed to ease his mind. Maybe he did the same for her.






Thomas found himself alive the next day, woken up by the sound of the morning announcements. Any comfort found in the previous night evaporated as Danya’s words came forth. He quickly looked over to Sakurako.

Her hair had been so long, then.

Not strong enough for a prince to climb, mind you, but with the texture of spun silk. Long enough to hang down her back easily. "That good hair." Something she liked, but nothing she'd flaunt to anyone. She'd still been childlike, very nearly childish. When people cut their eyes at her, she tried to smile despite it.

One day in algebra class, the teacher had played a movie that didn't move her. Falling asleep had only been natural.

Waking up had been horrifying.

Coming home? Being coldly told that she'd been at fault, was to blame? The last child that old woman would have chosen to bear her family's namesake?

It had felt like-

Being torn apart.

Sakurako's heartbeat felt more like one of Ace's beats than anything a human body could do. Her eyes darted back and forth between Sean and Thomas, almost begging them to say something that could stop whatever this was. She should have been smarter, more competent, anything than what she was. No one had come to save them, no one was coming, and trees swayed as she tried to get to her feet.

It hadn't been for lack of trying! Even at the cost of their lives, she'd seen classmates she wouldn't have lifted her hand to back in school do their best to break this game. It wasn't fair. The word unfair seemed as inadequate as her attempts to catch her breath, to say anything besides

"No no no no no" on repeat, sped up, chopped and screwed.

She still needed Adele to be her common sense, and Aditi to be her drive, and Charelle to make innuendos and... they were dead, she was breathing! She was useless! Yuka-chan'd fucking murdered someone before she could try to keep her from it and she just didn't understand how half of them were gone. Class of '18, the most dramatic fuckers ever to walk through George Hunter High and her skin felt clammy.

A week? A whole damned week?

Sakurako thought of Caroline, glanced at the gun, tried to move toward it. Thomas's face, lit by moonlight, flashed through her mind a second before she fainted for the second time in her life.

Sean braced himself for the voice that would come through. It was almost a ritual at this point for them, the only difference is how much sleep he managed to get for once. Now he could take in all the horror of his classmates with a clear mind.

So slightly less shitty than usual.

Once he had started however, that all came crashing down.

They were halfway through. Which as far as Sean could understand, meant half of them were dead.

A pit formed in his stomach. It had taken a week for half his classmates to kill each other or off themselves.

He couldn't say anything as he turned to his friends faces as they listened. Uncomfortable silence as Aditi and Charelle were named as part of the dead by a voice barely concealing the venom behind it. Silent dread as Sakurako got up to get something when he remembered she had been with these two before the clout gang and now that was gone. A yelp of suprise when she fell to the ground.

Like their hopes and plans.

More names were being said as Thomas fussed over her and Sean not knowing what to do with himself, if he could do anything. He turned to Zach to see if he had anything to say, specially since Wyatt was named among the dead.

As the announcements played, Zach looked to the others, observing their reactions. Apparently, they made to the halfway point of the game. Whoopee.

On the one hand, Zach was relieved that he and Sean were still alive, and even Thomas and Sakurako. However, he was also surprised that someone like himself made it this far. By all accounts, someone like Zach, who didn’t consider himself either strong or clever, should have been dead already.

But the biggest surprise came next. Wyatt fucking Carter was dead. The big, angry muscle freak was dead, and short, scrawny Zach was still alive. Zach couldn’t help but crack a smile at this news. Wyatt was a dreaded force Zach been trying to avoid, and now it’s gone. Zach turned to Sean and chuckled slightly.

“Heh, holy shit,” Zach said, “We actually outlived Wyatt. Fucking Wyatt!”

Other names stuck out to Zach. Jackson Sullivan and Johnny Silva Ruiz, a couple of his roommates during the trip, were dead too. Johnny tried to assault Zach while he was trying to do one of his vlogs. Zach’s grin grew slightly. He turned to Sean again.

“Sorry, but, thank fucking God, we’re still okay,” Zach said, trying to keep calm.