What do you like to see in fight scenes from an internal perspective? Not everyone feels like they do strong action scenes, so what kinds of things can those people apply other strengths to if they have trouble with the usual aspects of a fight?
From an internal perspective, I like to see people considering their movements on a basic level and good use of emotions. I'm not as keen on having detailed essay's on what their plan for the fight is or why everything matters by the same token. Quick, clear and easy to understand sentences are the order of the day I find and anything that muddies the prose is clutter. So metaphors probably aren't recommended.
- [+] Example
- Something moved in the darkness.
Kimiko had just enough time to realise she had been wrong before diving to the side, landing with a heavy thud on the cold tiled floor. There was a dull throb in her shoulder as she rolled backwards and away from Isabel.
Definitely bruised.
If she hadn't been expecting something she would have been impaled...just like Bradley.
She had Lily to thank for her life.
Isabel could just be made out in the darkness. She was different, more dangerous and violent then anyone Kimiko had met on the island.
Kimiko had been wrong. Isabel was a monster.
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The sword collided with nothing but cold, empty air as Isabel lunged forward.
She hadn't been fast enough.
Her right foot slammed down to the ground, stopping her momentum. Her sword retained in her hand by an awkward, loose grip. A direct result of not getting the resistance she was expecting.
A lock of hair fell from where it had been resting to right in front of Isabel's face.
Her head turned left towards the now floor bound Kimiko, and before she could muster up a second thought, she found herself taking a brutal swing with the sickle towards Kimiko's neck.
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There wasn't enough time to fully avoid Isabel's wild attack so Kimiko rolled to the side and felt the sickle carve a line across the back of her other shoulder.
She inhaled sharply at the pain and felt a wetness immediately start to ooze from the wound.
The shape of Isabel was above her, preparing for another vicious swing.
Before the strike could land, Kimiko lashed out with the hardest kick she had ever thrown, aiming directly for Isabel's knee.
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Isabel hissed as she found herself tumbling to the ground, her leg having collapsed from underneath her.
The sword clattered to the ground several feet away, having flown out of her already loose grip. Her elbow stung from hitting the ground as hard as it did.
She scrambled to get back up on her feet, she couldn't give the other girl a single moment. This was life or death.
Now on all fours, Isabel looked up to see that Kimiko had scooted back, and had started to pull a sword out of its sheath.
This was it.
Isabel pushed off with her feet, launching herself at the other girl.
These posts that I quickly grabbed show pretty well what I'm talking about in terms of what I like to see (I used my own stuff here mainly because it's just easier for me to grab). In SOTF, with most characters, you aren't going to get people who know how to fight, so most of the fights should be quick, scrappy affairs with a general lack of developed tactics. Proper feints and set-ups will be entirely missing for example and including those details will be unrealistic and worse, clutter your prose. You can still get a good emotional range even with shorter sentences which I think the example shows as well but it's delivered more through word choice and character actions rather than an exploration of the characters emotions.
If you have trouble with fights I'd say to focus on word choice and readability. In Blood Meridian and No Country for Old Men, Cormac McCarthy writes brilliant visceral descriptions of action and violence in very few words. It's all achieved through efficient but descriptive word choices, clear descriptions of the action and good scene setting beforehand. I'd say if people are struggling with writing their fights, take the time before your big scene to block out the environment you're in, a good environmental description of the arena gives people an easier time visualizing what's happening and as a bonus it will give you a better idea of what you're working with.
Another thing people can do is consider their characters goals. I know a lot of people like to figure out what their character is trying to achieve on the island. If their goal is to find their friends for example and a player has cornered them in a room with only one way out, they may fight over to the door and then run as soon as they get the chance. This can help you with your fight scene as that goal informs everything your character does in the fight. They would be less likely to try and tackle their attacker for example, as that would make it harder for them to get away.
If you feel like you do better with emotions this can still be worked in you'll just want to give simpler action descriptions and focus on your characters thoughts. Although still keep in mind we don't want to get long sentences of their feelings about the situation.
- [+] Example 2
- He threw another punch. Fear driving his movements, his body reacting on raw instinct. His terror becoming the twisted conductor of his body and moving him where it pleased. He was shaking as the adrenaline rushed through his system. His eyes were wide, while his stomach was threatening a mutiny but he forced himself to keep going. He only had one chance and he was terrified of what would happen if he didn't try to take it.
That's something I just wrote as an example of a more emotion-driven passage of a fight. It's still descriptive and clear in the action, but we have more of an internal focus which is also a viable option.
In the end, if you can write a good description or have a good understanding of your character you can write a good fight scene. The important thing is being clear and concise but there is room to play around and add in character emotions to make it that much more memorable or impactful for the reader.
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And that's our first question done! If people have anything they'd like to add to what I've alreay said the floor is yours.
I'll probably look at answering Jimmy's question sometime next weekend so we have until then to see if we can get a discussion going.