((Hansel Williams continued from
Quixotic))
A defeatist attitude hadn't crept upon him as he had gotten ready, though it was mostly through sheer will that it remained that way. He refused to think of scenarios that didn't include success, refused to feel like an idiot as he put gel in his hair, spritzed on cologne, shaved his patchy beart in favour of smooth cheeks. He didn't consider that what he had planned
wouldn't work, as he straightened his tie and slid his feet into shiny black shoes. It would work because it had to. It would work because it couldn't not.
Hansel had pulled out all the stops. He'd made sure he could take his mom's car, rather than the beaten up old pickup that wouldnn't impress a lady. He'd cleaned it for two days. He had a bouquet of an assortment of flowers resting on the passenger's seat as he turned onto his school's street, free leg bouncing and thumb being chewed on as the nerves finally settled in. In all of his two years at Aurora, he'd never asked a girl out, never felt the inclination to engage in what the students called "casual dating".
But now he was going to do it during prom.
Mirabella Strong had sat in front of him all throughout english class, and was one of the first people who'd been genuinely, honestly, openly
nice to him during his time here. He'd often thought about her skin, how clear it was and how it'd feel under his palm. He'd wanted to curl his fingers through hers ever since he'd seen them wrapped delicately around a pen, or straightening stationary on her desk.
As he stopped at a red light outside the school, he turned one of his hands over, studying the dry, flaking skin he didn't often take care of, running the tip of his finger along the callouses forming hard ridges. It would've likely been an unpleasant experience for her, but-
No. No, he was going to do this. He was going to be casual about it, but he was going to go through with it. He was fairly sure she didn't have any ties, especially since in all their classes together, she'd never mentioned a boyfriend, a prom date, anything to any of those that she was friendly with.
He'd know, because he often listened for her voice in crowds, picked it out with the ease of a radio signal.
Casual, Hansel thought, pulling into one of the few free spaces available. The flowers caught the dimming light, causing him to shoot them a grin. It would be amazing.
He sat down beside her at the table, sliding his chair closer to her, matching her enthusiastic grin with one of his own. Throughout the night, they would get more and more talkative, laughing together, her hand grabbing his in friendly recognition, companionable silence descending as he linked his fingers through hers and she looked towards the dancers with a wistful sigh. He'd pick up on that, a questioning brow raising as he turned to her.
Why aren't you out there?
he'd ask, and she'd shoot him an amused look.
I can't dance alone, Hansel,
she'd reply. He'd respond by standing, tugging her to her feet. She'd laugh, small and quietly, but would rise with him, go with him, twirl with him. She'd be patient with his inexperience, and he'd dip her on the dance floor, move his face closer to hers so that they were nose to nose, and -
Hansel shook himself when a car horn blared in the parking lot. To his right, Brandon Baxter and a few of the other jocks let out war woops and saluted a passing sedan with outstretched bottles of... something.
Shaking his head, the tall boy reached over to pick up the bouquet, opening his door to step from the car. He wondered where she was, where he'd find her, whether or not she would be pleasantly surprised by the flowers.
He got eight feet from the car when he spotted them.
Mirabella was looking radiant and glowing, in a dress, clearly made up for the occasion. She was looking especially radiant and glowing on the arm of her handsome young date.
Garrett Wilde.
Reflexively, Hansel's right fist curled into a vicelike grip, remembering the harsh feeling of blood and bone against it as he slammed it into Garrett's face. The two boys hadn't spoken a word - civil or otherwise - since that day, the day that Hansel had felt shredded, humiliated, disgusted with himself more than words could say.
And here he was again, with his hand squeezing Bella's shoulder, the two of them looking lovely and enraptured and like the
perfect fucking couple. Here he was again, feeling shredded and humiliated because, as usual, Garrett had the upper hand on him. Garrett was smarter, after all. Garrett was better.
He was moving, his
shiny shoes clicking against the asphalt of the parking lot, his
shaven cheeks cold against the night air, his hair stuck in the styled,
perfect mould that he'd set for it with liberal usage of a comb and gel. His left hand was crushing the bouquet as his pace increased, moving faster and faster until he was almost running across the parking lot, his path taking him right in front of both the prom queen and her lovely date, stopping right when he was nearly chest to chest with Garrett. Feelings welled within him that stung at his eyes and made them water - rage, hate, endearment, shyness, disappointment, fear.
Sadness.
His eyes moved to Mirabella's, then snapped to Garrett's before dropping to the asphalt. If either of them were quick enough, observant enough, they could see them start the process of filling, that deadly moment between being fine and letting the tears fall. After a second of motionlessness, Hansel stepped forwards, took the bouquet of flowers, and slapped it into Garrett's chest.
The motion had the two boys close, close enough for Hansel to mutter something in Garrett's ear, voice hoarse, throat full.
The words filled Hansel's head as he slid around Garrett and walked back to the car, hand empty of flowers, head filled with the two final words that he'd said to him. The shelter was open tonight, and he had a feeling that he wasn't going to go home for a time yet. He was going to peel off his suit, roll up his sleeves, and tend to strays and abused and broken members of animal kingdom.
The words reverberated in his skull as he slid back into the seat of the car, doing up his buckle. They hammered at him as he flicked a deft wrist over his keys, the engine roaring to life.
"
You win, Wilde."
((Hansel Williams, continued elsewhere))