Metastasis
Posted: Tue Jan 22, 2019 7:09 am
((Joe Carrasco continued from Huddle.))
Joe had slept briefly in one of the classrooms. Very briefly. He'd woken up before the announcements. He thought about leaving the classroom and continuing the hunt for Travis. But he hadn't. Maybe he was a little scared, now that the last day had sunk in a bit more. That wasn't to say he'd reconsidered. Even now, he was poking about the classrooms. Picking up an old, half-used pad of Post-It notes and a pen. The glue on the notes was brittle and wouldn't stick to anything once he separated them from the rest.
Now he sat at a desk. Scythe next to his chair. Bent over the post-it notes. He would peel off one and write a name that he remembered. He would try and stick it on the table. Then he would write another name on another note. The pen kept running out and Joe kept having to shake it or go looking for another one, and writing them all on one piece of paper would make more sense. But this helped him think.
He had written down killers he could remember. He couldn't remember all of them. Mostly people who'd killed a lot, like Katarina Konipaski and Hansel Williams. Some who'd killed people he knew, like Joachim Lovelace and Eliza Patton. He added Cody Patton, too. He knew between them they had a high body count, but he couldn't remember who'd killed who. Travis was on a post-it, too. His was underlined. Some of them had little marks next to their names. A little dash if Joe didn't have a face to associate with the name, like with Joachim, Eliza and Katarina. He could walk into one of them and probably not notice. ...Though given the amount of murder to their names, they were likely to shoot him on sight. Cody, he knew by sight. Hansel... he and Hansel went to the same church. Sometimes they talked. Joe knew Hansel pretty well, as far as people went. Conservative views aside, he'd never seemed like the guy to fly off the handle this badly.
Joe stared at the post-its. He looked at a name he could place the face to, and it became much more difficult to contemplate killing them. It was easier when he only knew the name.
"They are names. They are dangerous names. If you think of them as people, this will be harder," Joe said out loud. "You can think about them however you want once you've dealt with them. Right now? They're not people. They're murderers. Not people. Murderers."
It didn't help.
The air crackled as the speakers came online, and the kills and deaths were listed. Joe started scribbling the murderers down as they were announced. Jenna Rhodes. Maynard Hurst. Cody again—
R.J was dead. Joe's scribbling stopped. He stopped for long enough that he entirely forgot to write down the name of his murderer. Not that it mattered. She was dead already. Joe came to his senses in time to write down the avenger. Madeleine Wilcox.
Can't think about R.J.
Think about the killers.
Hansel again. Twice. What was wrong with him? How could someone kill... how many had he killed? Many. Maybe as many as Maximilian. Maybe more. Sharon Austin. Benja—Ben had killed again before Joe had gotten him. He'd been too late to stop that murder. But... but there would be no third one. Joe felt relief flood his stomach for a brief moment. Followed by disgust. It was wrong either way. ...But he'd had his doubts over Ben. And now he saw that Ben's babbling about building a shelter to stay safe was bullshit. No-one went out to slash throats if they just wanted to stay safe.
Joe felt a tight feeling in his chest when Aileen was mentioned. With no other outlet available, he just underlined Travis' name a second time.
Jessica was dead. Joe stopped again. He stopped long enough that he almost missed the rest of the announcement, including his own name. His hand went on autopilot and wrote down his name, as well as whoever the last killer was. He didn't recognise the name or have a face to put with it.
Had he been the last person to see her alive? Could he have done something? And would he have wanted to? He owed her, didn't he? The first thing he'd done on the island was take away her ally and then run and abandon her. He abandoned her again yesterday, instead running off to get Aileen killed.
...Drowning seemed like a nice death, though. Better than most others here.
Can't think about drowning or Jessica. Focus.
Joe looked down at the little mass of post-it notes. Twelve. If he included his own name. Joe frowned at it before peeling it off. He stuck it in his pocket. Then he eyed the post-it that said 'Madeleine Wilcox.' After a long stretch of consideration, he picked up the post-it, crumpled it up and threw it away. He continued to stare at the other ten.
"Murderers. Not people. Murderers," he murmured.
He still didn't believe it.
Joe had slept briefly in one of the classrooms. Very briefly. He'd woken up before the announcements. He thought about leaving the classroom and continuing the hunt for Travis. But he hadn't. Maybe he was a little scared, now that the last day had sunk in a bit more. That wasn't to say he'd reconsidered. Even now, he was poking about the classrooms. Picking up an old, half-used pad of Post-It notes and a pen. The glue on the notes was brittle and wouldn't stick to anything once he separated them from the rest.
Now he sat at a desk. Scythe next to his chair. Bent over the post-it notes. He would peel off one and write a name that he remembered. He would try and stick it on the table. Then he would write another name on another note. The pen kept running out and Joe kept having to shake it or go looking for another one, and writing them all on one piece of paper would make more sense. But this helped him think.
He had written down killers he could remember. He couldn't remember all of them. Mostly people who'd killed a lot, like Katarina Konipaski and Hansel Williams. Some who'd killed people he knew, like Joachim Lovelace and Eliza Patton. He added Cody Patton, too. He knew between them they had a high body count, but he couldn't remember who'd killed who. Travis was on a post-it, too. His was underlined. Some of them had little marks next to their names. A little dash if Joe didn't have a face to associate with the name, like with Joachim, Eliza and Katarina. He could walk into one of them and probably not notice. ...Though given the amount of murder to their names, they were likely to shoot him on sight. Cody, he knew by sight. Hansel... he and Hansel went to the same church. Sometimes they talked. Joe knew Hansel pretty well, as far as people went. Conservative views aside, he'd never seemed like the guy to fly off the handle this badly.
Joe stared at the post-its. He looked at a name he could place the face to, and it became much more difficult to contemplate killing them. It was easier when he only knew the name.
"They are names. They are dangerous names. If you think of them as people, this will be harder," Joe said out loud. "You can think about them however you want once you've dealt with them. Right now? They're not people. They're murderers. Not people. Murderers."
It didn't help.
The air crackled as the speakers came online, and the kills and deaths were listed. Joe started scribbling the murderers down as they were announced. Jenna Rhodes. Maynard Hurst. Cody again—
R.J was dead. Joe's scribbling stopped. He stopped for long enough that he entirely forgot to write down the name of his murderer. Not that it mattered. She was dead already. Joe came to his senses in time to write down the avenger. Madeleine Wilcox.
Can't think about R.J.
Think about the killers.
Hansel again. Twice. What was wrong with him? How could someone kill... how many had he killed? Many. Maybe as many as Maximilian. Maybe more. Sharon Austin. Benja—Ben had killed again before Joe had gotten him. He'd been too late to stop that murder. But... but there would be no third one. Joe felt relief flood his stomach for a brief moment. Followed by disgust. It was wrong either way. ...But he'd had his doubts over Ben. And now he saw that Ben's babbling about building a shelter to stay safe was bullshit. No-one went out to slash throats if they just wanted to stay safe.
Joe felt a tight feeling in his chest when Aileen was mentioned. With no other outlet available, he just underlined Travis' name a second time.
Jessica was dead. Joe stopped again. He stopped long enough that he almost missed the rest of the announcement, including his own name. His hand went on autopilot and wrote down his name, as well as whoever the last killer was. He didn't recognise the name or have a face to put with it.
Had he been the last person to see her alive? Could he have done something? And would he have wanted to? He owed her, didn't he? The first thing he'd done on the island was take away her ally and then run and abandon her. He abandoned her again yesterday, instead running off to get Aileen killed.
...Drowning seemed like a nice death, though. Better than most others here.
Can't think about drowning or Jessica. Focus.
Joe looked down at the little mass of post-it notes. Twelve. If he included his own name. Joe frowned at it before peeling it off. He stuck it in his pocket. Then he eyed the post-it that said 'Madeleine Wilcox.' After a long stretch of consideration, he picked up the post-it, crumpled it up and threw it away. He continued to stare at the other ten.
"Murderers. Not people. Murderers," he murmured.
He still didn't believe it.