Name: Janice Cresner
Gender: Female
Age: 17
Grade: Senior
School: John Endecott Memorial Academy
Hobbies and Interests: Streetball, playing the violin, geocaching, economics
Appearance: Janice is 5'8" tall and weighs 151 pounds with an athletic build. She has brown eyes, a triangular-shaped face, thick eyebrows, a thin nose and thin lips. She has her hair bleached making it appear white-ish blonde and has it tied in a ponytail. Her hair is straight and shoulder-length. Her skin is tanned due to her outside activities and she daily wears eyeliner and foundation, though she prefers to go for a more casual look. She is Caucasian.
She usually is seen wearing hoodies or jerseys with a plain colors and leggings. On the day of the abduction she wore a blue coat over a jersey with winter leggings with Yeezy boots.
Biography: Janice was born in 2004 to Norton and Deborah Cresner in Salem. Both being hard-working chemical engineers they didn't have much time taking care of her as a child. They could afford a babysitter who could take of her and were finicially well off due to their jobs, but when she was in the age of going to school she spent much time at her aunts house. They were well-off enough to be able to afford a house.
Therefore she grew up with her cousins who were around her age and very into sports, so she started playing sports with them. She eventually grew to love all kind of team sports, especially grew on playing streetball as a hobby. Janice was more influenced by the lifestyle of her cousins than the lifestyle of her parents.
Janice picked up playing the violin at the age of eleven due to Deborah, who used to a hobby pianist deciding that a kid needs to learn an instrument at a young age so it's easier for them in comparison to learning it at a later age. Deborah picked the violin for Janice because her former boyfriend was a violinists and she was fascinated by the violin. Norton and Deborah paid for a violin teacher and Janice took the lessons. Deborah was also of the opinion that since the violin is harder to play than the piano, Janice should learn violin as a kid, as she could pick up piano at a later time. At first Janice got frustrated of the teaching and wanted to quit early on, but from time she grew to love the instrument. It's a hobby she continued practising to this day, she even ended up joining to the school orchestra.
In school she started getting into sports as well. She went to the track team as she already was a pretty active kid, there was not much else that drew her to the sport. She was one of the faster kids and she enjoyed the fact that she was one of the better runners, so she liked the competitiveness of it as well as being better than the others. She also picked up basketball in school, a hobby she had deep interests in, it being a sport she played with her cousins early on. She watches the game as well on screen and she is a fan of the New England Patriots. It's a fun game for her, so much so that she also enjoys playing Streetball. She is regularly skilled in balling and plays on the defense.
In class she tries to do well at math as well as sciences due to her parents being endeavoured in the field of science, so she puts much more effort in these subjects as to not disappoint her parents. She also likes PE, due to her athletic nature. She's very earnest in studying because her parents pressure her into performing well, or having punishments such as limiting her phone or meeting with friends. She tries being a model student and show the teachers her knowledge and has tendencies to be a teacher's pet in some classes.
Outside of class she is good at socialising with her classmates, especially due to having grown up with her cousins that are roughly the same age, but can easily be aloof to others especially if they dont share the same circles. Her cousins also visit JEMA. She also gets easy into a fight with friends and is not that forgiving because she often doesn't seem the point of the other people. She also holds pretty grudges because of that. This argumentative nature and propensity to hold grudges costs her friends and limits her social circles.
She started drinking early, at age 14, introduced by her cousin Tim, who was two years older and also super into drinking. Tim had older friends he'd drink with, even though Aunt Vivien forbid him to. She began drinking more regularly as she grew older, going to parties with peers or with her cousins. She also started her habit of smoking at parties, in group circles. A habit that would help her relax. She didn't mind taking the risks of drinking and smoking, because she wanted to live her life to the fullest. Her parents didn't like it when she discovered her smoking (they did not mind the alcohol, because they were young once too), and got really angry with her. So she started only smoking at parties or outside. She still has the urge to smoke when stressed out. This lifestyle had a negative effect on her health, and she noticed that when she started getting worse in the tracking team. She began a diet that consisted of low-carb, in an attempt to balance out the harmful effects of her drinking and smoking. She started going vegetarian at age sixteen, for the diet and eventually dipped into veganism and has stayed ever since.
She quit the track team due to her poor perfomance, but picked up a new hobby to keep herself active: geocaching. She finds it very fascinating to travel the area to uncover things and solve puzzles. It keeps her daily routine fresh and she loves it. It gave her a new way to live life to the fullest because she'd experience so much through her travels. She has gotten some new friends through it; she is very selective in picking them, prefering those who she gets along with and who have a similiar attitude to hers.
For a student job, Janice babysits in her freetime. She plans on going into economics to have a stable job, since she exceeded in maths. For preparation she already took some online courses in business.
Advantages: Janice has a very competitive nature which might make her play the game. She's also experience in the nature due to her geocaching hobby.
Disadvantages: She is very daring and could risk her life. Her smoking and drinking habits have had a negative effect on her stamina. Janice has a tendency to be argumentative and uncooperative with whom she cannot see eye-to-eye.
Janice Cresner
Today I dreamt of writing SOTF stories, so I guess I should return
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MK Kilmarnock
- Posts: 2256
- Joined: Fri Aug 10, 2018 5:28 am
- Location: On one of the coasts, generally
Hi RC, let's give Janice another look. Been a while since I last saw her. She's still denied, pending some changes/thoughts/additions.
On the day of the abduction she wore a jersey with leggings with Nike sneakers. < The abduction takes place during wintertime. New England winters regularly fall below freezing temperatures, making this outfit very ill-suited to something she'd wear on the trip. I would ask that you reconsider her outfit.
Was there a particular reason she was born in a house and not at the hospital?
It's a hobby she continued practising to this day, though she only plays it in recitals and has not connected that hobby of hers with a school band or the like. < Why not? With a hobby and skill that ties so closely with the school curriculum and can be improved by playing in a school band, I don't see why Deborah wouldn't push her to do it (since she pressures her elsewhere in school), or why Janice wouldn't want to. If there is a reason, it's not given.
She began a diet that consisted of low-carb, to balance out the harmful effects of her drinking and smoking. < In an attempt to balance out the harmful effects, anyway, because that simply isn't going to work in the way she thinks it will.
Did her parents punish her at all when they found her smoking and drinking? What about Tim? They're bound to find out how she got access to tobacco and alcohol; would they forbid her to hang out with her cousin? Why was she spending so much time at her aunt's house instead of her own home? Do you think there would be a change to that once she started engaging in poor behavior like that?
How often are her cousins visiting JEMA, and for how long? They must go to school themselves, so they're only able to see her after school. There's a lot here that doesn't really make sense to me. If they live close enough to her that she's spending all her time at her cousin's house, they'd probably go to the same school and, if they don't, I don't see how much time they're going to have to visit Janice's school.
She also picked up basketball in school, a hobby she had deep interests in, it being a sport she played with her cousins early on. She watches the game as well on screen and she is a fan of the New England Patriots > The Patriots are an American football team, not a basketball team. If she watches basketball on tv, she's probably following the Boston Celtics.
She went to the track team as she already was a pretty active kid, there was not much else that drew her to the sport > comma after kid should be a semicolon. That second clause also seems rather pointless and ordinarily, I would ask you to remove it. However, I recognize the only reason it's there in the first place is that I asked you to tell me why she joined track. I don't find this to be a satisfactory answer though, because just 'being active' doesn't really define why she chooses one sport over another. You even say in the very next sentence that she's one of the faster kids and enjoyed that she's one of the better runners, and enjoyed the competitiveness. Those are all valid answers. So ultimately, get rid of that 'not much else that drew her' bit and rewrite the sentences to flow together.
Some grammar stuff, by no means an all-inclusive sweep:
but when she was in the age of going to school she spent much time at her aunts house. < 'in the age of going to school' is super awkward. You can probably rewrite this to 'but when she was old enough to go to school she spent much of her time at her aunt's house.'
Therefore she grew up with her cousins who were around her age and very into sports, so she started playing sports with them. < A comma should follow 'therefore'. Also, join this paragraph with the one before it, since they're talking about the same idea.
due to Deborah, who used to a hobby pianist deciding that a kid needs to learn an instrument at a young age > there should be a second comma after 'hobby pianist' to help the sentence read better.
At first Janice got frustrated of the teaching > At first, Janice got frustrated with learning violin
but from time > but over time
She's also experience in the nature due to her geocaching hobby. > She's also experienced in nature due to her geocaching hobby.
That's all I've got for now. Make those changes and I'll look again.
On the day of the abduction she wore a jersey with leggings with Nike sneakers. < The abduction takes place during wintertime. New England winters regularly fall below freezing temperatures, making this outfit very ill-suited to something she'd wear on the trip. I would ask that you reconsider her outfit.
Was there a particular reason she was born in a house and not at the hospital?
It's a hobby she continued practising to this day, though she only plays it in recitals and has not connected that hobby of hers with a school band or the like. < Why not? With a hobby and skill that ties so closely with the school curriculum and can be improved by playing in a school band, I don't see why Deborah wouldn't push her to do it (since she pressures her elsewhere in school), or why Janice wouldn't want to. If there is a reason, it's not given.
She began a diet that consisted of low-carb, to balance out the harmful effects of her drinking and smoking. < In an attempt to balance out the harmful effects, anyway, because that simply isn't going to work in the way she thinks it will.
Did her parents punish her at all when they found her smoking and drinking? What about Tim? They're bound to find out how she got access to tobacco and alcohol; would they forbid her to hang out with her cousin? Why was she spending so much time at her aunt's house instead of her own home? Do you think there would be a change to that once she started engaging in poor behavior like that?
How often are her cousins visiting JEMA, and for how long? They must go to school themselves, so they're only able to see her after school. There's a lot here that doesn't really make sense to me. If they live close enough to her that she's spending all her time at her cousin's house, they'd probably go to the same school and, if they don't, I don't see how much time they're going to have to visit Janice's school.
She also picked up basketball in school, a hobby she had deep interests in, it being a sport she played with her cousins early on. She watches the game as well on screen and she is a fan of the New England Patriots > The Patriots are an American football team, not a basketball team. If she watches basketball on tv, she's probably following the Boston Celtics.
She went to the track team as she already was a pretty active kid, there was not much else that drew her to the sport > comma after kid should be a semicolon. That second clause also seems rather pointless and ordinarily, I would ask you to remove it. However, I recognize the only reason it's there in the first place is that I asked you to tell me why she joined track. I don't find this to be a satisfactory answer though, because just 'being active' doesn't really define why she chooses one sport over another. You even say in the very next sentence that she's one of the faster kids and enjoyed that she's one of the better runners, and enjoyed the competitiveness. Those are all valid answers. So ultimately, get rid of that 'not much else that drew her' bit and rewrite the sentences to flow together.
Some grammar stuff, by no means an all-inclusive sweep:
but when she was in the age of going to school she spent much time at her aunts house. < 'in the age of going to school' is super awkward. You can probably rewrite this to 'but when she was old enough to go to school she spent much of her time at her aunt's house.'
Therefore she grew up with her cousins who were around her age and very into sports, so she started playing sports with them. < A comma should follow 'therefore'. Also, join this paragraph with the one before it, since they're talking about the same idea.
due to Deborah, who used to a hobby pianist deciding that a kid needs to learn an instrument at a young age > there should be a second comma after 'hobby pianist' to help the sentence read better.
At first Janice got frustrated of the teaching > At first, Janice got frustrated with learning violin
but from time > but over time
She's also experience in the nature due to her geocaching hobby. > She's also experienced in nature due to her geocaching hobby.
That's all I've got for now. Make those changes and I'll look again.
V8 Characters:
Hades Thompson: Scary on the outside, dying on the inside
Ruth Flanagan: Never talk to me or my brother or my brother or my brother or my brother ever again
Vladimir Tepes: Not a vampire, so invite him in
Hades Thompson: Scary on the outside, dying on the inside
Ruth Flanagan: Never talk to me or my brother or my brother or my brother or my brother ever again
Vladimir Tepes: Not a vampire, so invite him in
This character biography has had no alterations for more than two weeks and has been put in the abandoned characters forum. This profile is eligible for resubmission by the handler upon alterations requested by the staff.
"Art enriches the community, Steve, no less than a pulsing fire hose, or a fireman beating down a blazing door. So what if we're drawing a nude man? So what if all we ever draw is a nude man, or the same nude man over and over in all sorts of provocative positions? Context, not content! Process, not subject! Don't be so gauche, Steve, it's beneath you."