"Don’t just give up. Don’t just forgive me! You’re meant to live! You’re meant to have time to hate me!" - Molly Oliveira

Give Me Liberty Or Give Me Dead Kids

AKA: Impereld hasn't read V7

This is the critique board, suggested by Outfoxd. Come here to request critiques and critique the work of others. The goal of this board is to be a respectful environment conducive to the improvement of writing skills.
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Impereld
Posts: 2
Joined: Tue Mar 19, 2019 4:42 pm

Give Me Liberty Or Give Me Dead Kids

#1

Post by Impereld »

So yeah, I haven't read V7, so tell me which of your kids I should read.

A few notes:

This thread is for dead characters only. It's much safer to critique dead people, they lack the ability to sock you in the nose.

I'm doing this mostly so I can read V7. I read like five pregame threads back when it was going on, so I'm pretty much going in blind. That's why I would largely prefer characters from V7. I mean, if you want me to look at V6 or V5 or Program or your fanfiction where Liam Black rides a dragon, I probably will. Just if we could keep it focused on V7 that'd be peachy.

Unless specifically requested otherwise, I'll be reading everything. Pregame, game, memories, meanwhile, all of it.

As a random person on the Internet, I am automatically right, even when I'm not. Also as random web person, I reserve the right to be an asshole and then insist I'm in the right, even though I'm blatantly wrong.

So yeah, let's have some fun.
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Brackie
Posts: 800
Joined: Mon Aug 13, 2018 3:37 pm

#2

Post by Brackie »

wicka wicka wicka
[+] The Island
V4: G069 - Clio Gabriella: Hold me closer, tiny dancer; count the headlights on the highway to hell.
V4: G083 - Paige Strand: Feelings don't try to hurt you, even the painful ones. You're responsible for all of the damn consequences.
V4: B118 - Jacob Charles: Every grieving heart has screamed at one time or another 'why can't you just let me die?'
V4: G114 - Aston Bennett: A woman who desires revenge must dig three graves.
V4: B108 - Ma'afu Tuigamala: Most men would rather forget a hard truth than face it.
V5: G015 - Janie Sinneave: Every human being must find her own way to cope with the impossible, and the only job of a true friend is to facilitate whatever method she doesn't choose.
V6: B018 - Maxim Kehlenbrink: Too much self-centered attitude brings isolation. Result: loneliness, fear, anger, and a hammer to the skull.
V7: G044 - Mikki Swift: It takes 18 years to build a reputation and a minute to ruin it.
V7: G070 - Jessica Rennes: Despair is our chance to wrestle with water and fall through.
V7: G075 - Aditi Sharma: She can still scream that rebel yell, just as loud as it was in 2005.
[+] Home
V4: B042 - Brendan Wallace: History has a way of repeating itself for years to come.
Meanwhile...
v5 - Penny Huang: Good girls can make bad decisions.
v5 - Jasper Rourke: Of all the words of mice and men, the saddest are, "what could have been".
v7 - Gaelan Meloy: And nothing matters.
v7 - Jordan Brankovich: Rethinking it all.
v7 - Kayden Brockman: Not done yet.
v7 - Ji-hyun Christensen: Just getting started.
[+] Remind Me Tomorrow
Destiny Martinez will live fast and die faster.
Aidan Winston is going to let you know you're not solving anything.
Lara Rodriguez thinks you should keep your opinion on her to yourself.
Peyton Hoffman isn't fond of the PC Police ruining everything.
Lindsey Sewall wants to make sure you drank water today you stupid bitch.
Luke Travers needs to have a code.
I'm hosting a SOTF!
SOTF: International
Applications Open Now!
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Latin For Dragula
Posts: 1802
Joined: Thu Aug 09, 2018 3:37 pm
Contact:
Contact Latin For Dragula

#3

Post by Latin For Dragula »

Jeremiah Anderson please!
[+] SotF Characters
[+] V5 Characters
ImageG056, Alda Abbate(Adopted)
It was difficult to nail down exactly when the anger started. Remembering a time when it wasn't there, coiled up and waiting to strike or alive and thrashing, was growing more and more challenging. It'd been with her for so long that it no longer felt like an intruder in her mind. It felt like a part of her.
ImageB062, Garrett Wilde
I multiplied. Then I subtracted. That's what we do now. That's how we keep the most people around.
ImageB014, Joachim Lovelace(Adopted)
Your turn.
[+] V6 Characters

ImageG037, Abby Floyd:This place was vile. Overwhelmingly, terribly vile. Character Theme: Everything's Alright-Emily Scholz
ImageB016, Ty Yazzie: You ever wonder if you still got a home to go back to? Character Theme: Warrior People-Medicine For The People
ImageIsaac Brea(Adopted from Espi): Isaac's well of fucks was bone-dry. Character Theme: The Whiskey, The Liar, The Thief-Patent Pending
ImageG011, Caedyn Miller:So...how did you wanna do this? Feeling an open casket? Or is that dumb? Nah, don't say it, that's dumb. We'll be soup by the time they send us home anyway. Character Theme: Sleep-My Chemical Romance
ImageG032, Irene Djezari(Adopted from CicadaDays): Death was not worse than Meme Hell. Character Theme: A Beautiful Lie-30 Seconds To Mars
[+] V7 Characters
ImageB066, Blaise d'Aramitz: I am not fucking dabbing on a corpse, Carl. Character Theme: The Nurse Who Loved Me-A Perfect Circle
ImageG032, Helena 'Hel" Fury: I hope my family’s waiting. The one I made out here. I hope you’ll be a part of it again. Character Theme: Fix Me-10 YearsImage
ImageB073, Jeremiah Anderson: "GO--GO--GO." Character theme: The Big Sleep-Murder By Death
ImageG066, Marco Hart: I'm not satisfied anymore. I don't think I'd want to be if I could. Character theme: Maurice's Monsters-Small Leaks Sink Ships
ImageG080, Nikki Nelson-Kelly: The fools. The morons. The aBsOlUtE cReTiNs. Character Theme: Movement-The Whip
ImageG062, Tonya Collins: The girl, the person, the thing, the shape on the screen, that wasn't her. Character Theme: Get Down-Isador
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Cactus
Posts: 2089
Joined: Mon Aug 13, 2018 3:36 pm
Location: Toronto, Canada

#4

Post by Cactus »

Ariana please.
[+] V7

B027 - Morgan Dragosavich: "Now come on, you have a flight to catch."
Status: DECEASED
V7: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17
Pregame: P1 - P2 - P3 - P4 - P5 - P6 - P7 - M1 - PPr1 - PPr2 - T1 - T2 - T3

B042 - Connor Lorenzen: "You— you're gonna have to live with this for— for a long time. A long time, and I hope you do, brother. Really."
Status: DECEASED
V7: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14
Pregame: P1 - P2 - P3 - P4 - P5 - P6 - M1 - M2 - Pr1 - PoPr1 - T1

B005 - Claudeson Bademosi: "May you see your Redeemer face to face and enjoy the vision of God forever."
Status: DECEASED
V7: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20
Pregame: P1 - P2 - P3 - P4 - P5 - P6 -M1 - VPS - T1

B062 - Jeff Greene: "Wait a minute, you're not Palom—"
Status: DECEASED (adopted from Blastinus)
V7: 9 - 10 - 11

G042 - Ariana Moretti: "You were always here."
Status: DECEASED
V7: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5
Pregame: P1 - P2 - P3 - P4 - P5 - P6 - M1 - M2 - M3 - T1 - T2 - T3
[+] Meanwhile...

V7 (2018):

Life; As It Happens

1: The Essay; June 2, 2015
2: The Pizza; June 6, 2015
3: The Leak; June 7, 2015
4: The Safe; June 4, 2018
5: The Call; September 19, 2015
6: Coda
7: The Secret; June 4, 2018
8: ???; June 9, 2018
9: ???; June 10, 2018
10: ???; June 10, 2018
11: ???; September 13, 2018

Ross Miller

1: Shatterday; June 9, 2018
2: I Wait on You Inside the Bottom of the Deep Blue Sea; July 13, 2018 - ongoing
3: ???
4: ???
5: ???

Pregame: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - M1 - M2 - SP - Snapchat

Carl Fredericks/Steven Lorenzen: The Needs of the Many

V6 (2015)
Mrs. Ritch: Sweet Billy
[+] The Past

The Creme de la Creme

V3: B007 - Keith Jackson: At the end of the road he's running, looking back to survey where he's been.
V1/3: B077 - Adam Dodd: You either die a hero, or live long enough to become the villain. The truth lies somewhere in between.
V1: B087 - Sidney Crosby: It's only cowardice if other people are around to tell you so. Otherwise, it's survival.
V1: B092 - Eddie Serjeantson: Fully in charge, but not much of an arborist.
V2: B013 - Andrew Ponikarovsky: Probably could have used a proper license and a driving lesson.
V1: G005 - Amanda Jones: A breath of fresh air, and in the end, that was all it took.
V3: B099 - John Sheppard: Went out with a bang.
V3: B122 - Ryan Atwell: Couldn't help but write a "Dear John" letter.
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BlizzardeyeWonder
Posts: 1086
Joined: Mon Aug 13, 2018 3:41 pm
Location: the shadow realm

#5

Post by BlizzardeyeWonder »

Ah hell with it, Meilin Zhou if you will.
she/her/he/him
[+] V8 - CURRENT

Meena Lalita Kumar
the dreaded SI
>Pregame Start: Cast Call
--> Pregame Status: Crying in the (music) club
>Homecoming Start: Dying Clean And Pretty
-->Homecoming Status: It's worse fresh (ish) off a breakup
>Game Start: It's Lights Out, And Away They Go!
-->Game Status (FINAL): The future sucks.

Tenshi Marie Anastasie Fukushima-Yves
#1 princess and voca-tuber in the whole wide world
>Pregame Start: Cast Call
--> Pregame Status: Trying and failing to share manga
>Homecoming Start: N/A
-->Homecoming Status: N/A
>Game Start: spawn more overlords!
-->Game Status (FINAL): A star has fallen.

Iliya "Liya" Polaris - DEAD
rebelling against a traditional Wiccan upbringing
>Pregame Start: Cast Call
--> Pregame Status: Some things are more important than a party
>Homecoming Start: Guys and Dolls
-->Homecoming Status: don't tell anyone this but she was actually one of the raccoons
>Game Start: A Question of Faith
-->Game Status (FINAL): The spirit was weak.

Daniel Ozanne
poker twink
>Pregame Start: Cast Call
--> Pregame Status: Uncomfortable questions
>Homecoming Start: N/A
-->Homecoming Status: N/A
>Game Start: nooooo don't get kidnapped by the AT your too sexy aha
-->Game Status: breaking down but trying to help
[+] V7
[+] Meilin
Meilin Zhou (Wiki) - DEAD

>Pregame Start: life observes itself
-->Pregame Status: Waltzed out a party with her crush
>Prom Start: Fancy Meeting You Here
-->Prom Status: Taking a dance, taking on the world
>Trip Start: The Best of You
-->Trip Status: Running away from an eyeful of NSFW
>Game Start: Rise Great Undead Lord Dread
-->Game Status (FINAL): Stop hitting yourself

Aesthetics
"No sun to rise would be okay with me... Everyday, every day is okay"
[+] Camilla
Camilla Bell (Wiki) - DEAD

>Pregame Start: Who's Turn Was It, Anyway?
-->Pregame Status: Had more than her fair share of revelry
>Prom Start: Early in the Morning
-->Prom Status: Ditching the drama for blues
>Trip Start: When I'm Gone
-->Trip Status: Preemptively homesick
>Game Start: Bloom Nobly, in a Transient Life
-->Game Status (FINAL): Loved to death.

Aesthetics
"A voice in her head, a voice in her head, screaming all the words that were left unsaid"
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Tonyksin
Posts: 534
Joined: Mon Aug 13, 2018 3:51 pm
Location: New Jersey

#6

Post by Tonyksin »

Lorenzo Tavares if you'd like :)
V8 Relationship Chart
[+] V8 Kids Lined Up To Die
Sebastian Odegaard - Playing The Leading Man
Yoona Lee - Rejecting Society
Chanel Andersson-Joseph - Changing Her Aesthetic
Marc Hines - Lazer-Focused on the Future
[+] V7 Kiddos
V7:
Relationship Thread
Appearance Tracker

ImageLorenzo Tavares B03 - DEAD
Pregame:1 2 3 4 5 Memories:1 2 3 4 Prom: 1 2 3 4 Trip: 1
Island: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12
ImageGina Petrov G43 - DEAD
Pregame: 1 2 3 4 Memories: 1 2 Prom: 1 2 Trip: 1
Island: 1 2 3
ImageJackson Sullivan B36 - DEAD
Pregame: 1 2 3 4 5 Memories: 1 Prom: 1 2 Trip: 1
Island: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
ImageAmelia Fischer G34 - DEAD
Pregame: 1 Memories: 1 2 Prom: 1 2 Trip: 1
Island: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11
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