"Don’t just give up. Don’t just forgive me! You’re meant to live! You’re meant to have time to hate me!" - Molly Oliveira

died before first rolls emporium

we all know this will fall by the wayside thooooo [death thread critiques]

This is the critique board, suggested by Outfoxd. Come here to request critiques and critique the work of others. The goal of this board is to be a respectful environment conducive to the improvement of writing skills.
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Namira
Posts: 1803
Joined: Tue Aug 14, 2018 10:11 am

#16

Post by Namira »

I'm happy for anything I'm involved with to be examined.
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Catche Jagger
Posts: 345
Joined: Thu May 23, 2019 12:39 am

#17

Post by Catche Jagger »

Blanket permissions granted
[+] sig
[+] V7
ImageB078 - Thomas Buckley: "Holy- yes, I am scared because I am not ignorant to the world around me. What the fuck are you talking about ‘am I scared’?”
Status: DECEASED
Memory: 1 | Pregame: 1-2 | Trip: 1
V7: 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9

ImageG078 - Sapphire Waters: “It’s okay, Emmett…”
Status: DECEASED
Pregame: 1
V7: 1-2-3-4

ImageB079 - Colin McCabe: “Hey you murderous prick! Tell me how the fucking dirt tastes!”
Status: DECEASED
Pregame: 1-2
V7: 1-2-3-4-5-6-7
#1 Uriel Hunter stan

"I'm refined, I'm cultured. I'm a fashionista. I'm everything you're not and never will be." - Ali Grayston, 2006
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Pippi
Posts: 1393
Joined: Mon Aug 13, 2018 7:04 pm
Location: I'm from England!

#18

Post by Pippi »

blanket!
[+] V9
Amber Barnes
Dennis "Buck" Buckley
Patty English
Alejandro Garcia de Teresa
[+] The Past
V8
S009 - Trinity Ashmore - DECEASED - Sasumata - Embrace the dark you call a home, gaze upon an empty white throne - overlords! > Zeus > Road > Recycle > Clarification > Now? > Dodge
Pregame - Annabelle > Light > Treasures

S019 - Robin Valenti - DECEASED - Bowie knife - And if you don't love me now, you will never love me again, I can still hear you saying you would never break the chain - Lights
Pregame - Tears
The Past - like > You
It's Media - awry

S038 - Jess Kawazoe - DECEASED - MAC-11 - What's going on? Could this be my understanding? It's not your fault, I was being too demanding - Veridis > Lines > Circuit > Human
Pregame - Voyager
It's Media - ALERT

S054 - Beatrice Briggs - DECEASED - Broadaxe - Calling for the hero, here comes a big rush, if only for tomorrow, hold on and push up - Prison > Healing > father > Flowers > Beautiful > Gentle > Sing > Ordovician > You > Permian > World > sunflower > universe
Pregame - Sunset

Left Behind (Pregame)
Poppy Fontaine - Here comes the sun, here comes the raging sun, and it's raging on and so we rage as one, on until the day is done - Pregame - door > Fight!
It's Media - neighbors

Ada Bentley - Stranded on an island made of glass, trapped between the future and the past - Pregame - Intro
It's Media - Typo! > Neighbourhood > everyone
V7
B006 - Stepney Cruz - DEAD - Dynasty decapitated, you just might see a ghost tonight - Mountain Bike - Localised - Catastrophe - Inferno
Pregame - Chill - Loss - Realm
Trip - Loved

G035 - Katie Agustien - DEAD - There's only two ways that these things can go, good or bad and how was I to know that all your friends won't hold any grudges, I got the final judgment - The World's Sharpest Knife™ - Dread - Skin - ieatnothing - Satisfaction - Tempest - Zero
Pregame - Vend-etta - Flames - Fleet - Monachopsis - Glitter
Trip - G҉ A҉ N҉ G҉

B028 - Aurelien Valter - DEAD - When everything's lost, they pick up their hearts and avenge defeat, before it all starts, they suffer through harm just to touch a dream - Spiked Mace, Glock 19, Min-Jae Parker's Crossbow - Nightmare - Bubbles - Neighbourhood - Tragedy - Make It - Fiend - Sleet - Love - Walls - Friends - Key - Everything - Gotta - Ghosts - Alone
Pregame - Shark - Heart
Prom - Link - Gradation - Ballare
Trip - Inferis - Scusare

B052 - Garren Mortimer - DEAD- Cut up and I can't feel my hands, no need to chase, can you relate, can you keep up the pace like you're dying for this? - Bryan Calvert's SPAS-12, Alligator tooth sword - Sky - Geek - Nation - No - Dilemma - Mauerbauertraurigkeit - Struck - Punishment - Énouement - Pain - Learn - lamb - Moves
Pregame - Rain
Trip - Life

Meanwhile
Lyra Doyle - Let's live tonight like fireflies, and one by one light up the sky - Pop!
Pregame - Evolution - Life - Lo Mein
Memories - Forward - Odds

Dean Puchero - By July you'd made a whole bunch of brand new friends, people you used to look down on, and you'd figured out a way to make real money - Phone - Angel
Pregame - Generation - Prince
Memories - Star
Prom - Sun - Luster
V6
Bryony Adams - Burning bright until the end, now you'll be missing from the photographs
Astrid Tate - So what became of loving man, and what became of you?
Mia Rose - You can't understand that I won't leave 'til we're finished here, and then you'll find out where it all went wrong
V5
Owen Kay - I fold my tie and ribbon to hide my scars, that's how it starts
Amy Bachelor - Can you whisper, as it crumbles and breaks, as you shiver, count up all your mistakes
Francis St. Ledger - So a day when you've lost yourself completely could be a night when your life ends
V4
George Leidman (Adopted from Blastinus) - Now if we jump together at least we can swim far away from the wreck that we made
Tim - Freddie - Kendra
[+] The Future
Boyd Adkinson - Ain't no surprise that I can't sleep tonight, my only vice is standing by your side
Redd Quintero
Melissa 'Lissa' McCree
Jamie Mittelman
Tabitha 'Tabby' Sun
Natalie McGuiness
Takumi Tsunoda
Ophelia Wright
Anna Montgomery
Jordan Rush
Patton Tesser
"bryony and alba would definitely join the terrorists quote me on this put this quote in signatures put it in history books" - Cicada Days, 2017
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Cicada
Posts: 1479
Joined: Tue Aug 14, 2018 11:51 am

#19

Post by Cicada »

Queue's been filled up for now (sorry Plush, but I did say first 2). I may make an adjustment specifying the allowances for single-person death threads because of you'll cowards, etc. Anyways, I'll post them when they're done!
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Latin For Dragula
Posts: 1802
Joined: Thu Aug 09, 2018 3:37 pm
Contact:
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#20

Post by Latin For Dragula »

Cicada wrote: ↑Sat Dec 28, 2019 11:46 pm Queue's been filled up for now (sorry Plush, but I did say first 2).
this is discrimination against the illiterate and you will be hearing from my lawyers as soon as i figure out how to dial a phone
[+] SotF Characters
[+] V5 Characters
ImageG056, Alda Abbate(Adopted)
It was difficult to nail down exactly when the anger started. Remembering a time when it wasn't there, coiled up and waiting to strike or alive and thrashing, was growing more and more challenging. It'd been with her for so long that it no longer felt like an intruder in her mind. It felt like a part of her.
ImageB062, Garrett Wilde
I multiplied. Then I subtracted. That's what we do now. That's how we keep the most people around.
ImageB014, Joachim Lovelace(Adopted)
Your turn.
[+] V6 Characters

ImageG037, Abby Floyd:This place was vile. Overwhelmingly, terribly vile. Character Theme: Everything's Alright-Emily Scholz
ImageB016, Ty Yazzie: You ever wonder if you still got a home to go back to? Character Theme: Warrior People-Medicine For The People
ImageIsaac Brea(Adopted from Espi): Isaac's well of fucks was bone-dry. Character Theme: The Whiskey, The Liar, The Thief-Patent Pending
ImageG011, Caedyn Miller:So...how did you wanna do this? Feeling an open casket? Or is that dumb? Nah, don't say it, that's dumb. We'll be soup by the time they send us home anyway. Character Theme: Sleep-My Chemical Romance
ImageG032, Irene Djezari(Adopted from CicadaDays): Death was not worse than Meme Hell. Character Theme: A Beautiful Lie-30 Seconds To Mars
[+] V7 Characters
ImageB066, Blaise d'Aramitz: I am not fucking dabbing on a corpse, Carl. Character Theme: The Nurse Who Loved Me-A Perfect Circle
ImageG032, Helena 'Hel" Fury: I hope my family’s waiting. The one I made out here. I hope you’ll be a part of it again. Character Theme: Fix Me-10 YearsImage
ImageB073, Jeremiah Anderson: "GO--GO--GO." Character theme: The Big Sleep-Murder By Death
ImageG066, Marco Hart: I'm not satisfied anymore. I don't think I'd want to be if I could. Character theme: Maurice's Monsters-Small Leaks Sink Ships
ImageG080, Nikki Nelson-Kelly: The fools. The morons. The aBsOlUtE cReTiNs. Character Theme: Movement-The Whip
ImageG062, Tonya Collins: The girl, the person, the thing, the shape on the screen, that wasn't her. Character Theme: Get Down-Isador
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CondorTalon
Posts: 479
Joined: Wed Sep 05, 2018 6:17 am

#21

Post by CondorTalon »

Blanket.
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Ohm
Posts: 696
Joined: Mon Aug 13, 2018 3:49 pm
Location: Away from the hopeless peasantry

#22

Post by Ohm »

Blanket permission.
[+] V6
G019 Serena Waters
Image
The Past:
1
Island:
1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-11-12
Meanwhile:
1
B037 William "Will" McKinley
Image(Adopted from Dannyrulx)
Dannyrulx:
Memories:
1-2
Pregame:
1-2
Sadie Hawkins Dance:
1-2
Island:
1-2
Adoption:
3-4-5-6-7-8
[+] V7
B026 Sean Leibowitz
Image Image
1-2-3-4-5-6-7
B071 Sal Bonaventura (Adopted from Skraal)
Skraal:
1-2-3-4-5
Adoption:
6-7-8-9
B085 Brandon Murphy (adopted from Rattlesnake)
1-2-3
[+] V8
Timothy Adams
Andrew Lapson
William "Bill" Taylor
Amos Flanigan
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Cactus
Posts: 2089
Joined: Mon Aug 13, 2018 3:36 pm
Location: Toronto, Canada

#23

Post by Cactus »

saying yes or no has never stopped the site from analyzing my shit before, who am i to change that now?
do what you must.
[+] V7

B027 - Morgan Dragosavich: "Now come on, you have a flight to catch."
Status: DECEASED
V7: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17
Pregame: P1 - P2 - P3 - P4 - P5 - P6 - P7 - M1 - PPr1 - PPr2 - T1 - T2 - T3

B042 - Connor Lorenzen: "You— you're gonna have to live with this for— for a long time. A long time, and I hope you do, brother. Really."
Status: DECEASED
V7: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14
Pregame: P1 - P2 - P3 - P4 - P5 - P6 - M1 - M2 - Pr1 - PoPr1 - T1

B005 - Claudeson Bademosi: "May you see your Redeemer face to face and enjoy the vision of God forever."
Status: DECEASED
V7: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20
Pregame: P1 - P2 - P3 - P4 - P5 - P6 -M1 - VPS - T1

B062 - Jeff Greene: "Wait a minute, you're not Palom—"
Status: DECEASED (adopted from Blastinus)
V7: 9 - 10 - 11

G042 - Ariana Moretti: "You were always here."
Status: DECEASED
V7: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5
Pregame: P1 - P2 - P3 - P4 - P5 - P6 - M1 - M2 - M3 - T1 - T2 - T3
[+] Meanwhile...

V7 (2018):

Life; As It Happens

1: The Essay; June 2, 2015
2: The Pizza; June 6, 2015
3: The Leak; June 7, 2015
4: The Safe; June 4, 2018
5: The Call; September 19, 2015
6: Coda
7: The Secret; June 4, 2018
8: ???; June 9, 2018
9: ???; June 10, 2018
10: ???; June 10, 2018
11: ???; September 13, 2018

Ross Miller

1: Shatterday; June 9, 2018
2: I Wait on You Inside the Bottom of the Deep Blue Sea; July 13, 2018 - ongoing
3: ???
4: ???
5: ???

Pregame: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - M1 - M2 - SP - Snapchat

Carl Fredericks/Steven Lorenzen: The Needs of the Many

V6 (2015)
Mrs. Ritch: Sweet Billy
[+] The Past

The Creme de la Creme

V3: B007 - Keith Jackson: At the end of the road he's running, looking back to survey where he's been.
V1/3: B077 - Adam Dodd: You either die a hero, or live long enough to become the villain. The truth lies somewhere in between.
V1: B087 - Sidney Crosby: It's only cowardice if other people are around to tell you so. Otherwise, it's survival.
V1: B092 - Eddie Serjeantson: Fully in charge, but not much of an arborist.
V2: B013 - Andrew Ponikarovsky: Probably could have used a proper license and a driving lesson.
V1: G005 - Amanda Jones: A breath of fresh air, and in the end, that was all it took.
V3: B099 - John Sheppard: Went out with a bang.
V3: B122 - Ryan Atwell: Couldn't help but write a "Dear John" letter.
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Zetsu
Posts: 761
Joined: Thu Aug 16, 2018 6:58 am

#24

Post by Zetsu »

you receive blanket permit!!
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