Rock Me Now

[Theirmit]

. . . Stella, to most, had a certain air of mystique to her. Looked and talked like a stock photograph of an opening-credits-main-cast cheerleader, but there was always a certain aura of... guarded control, of calculation, of a cold intensity behind her eyes. Never acted surprised, never acted shocked. Finished other people's sentences before they could say start. So naturally, people were drawn to her. But in order to really understand Stella Nyquist, you had to know what she'd been like before she'd found ambition. And if anyone held the claim closest to that, it was Ingrid Mueller. Before they were even friends up above the monkey bars, Ingrid had known Stella in first grade. Stella Nyquist never spoke unless she had something to say. Stella Nyquist spent every bus ride home listening to Daft Punk on her dad's ancient MP3 player. Stella Nyquist realized you could add a number to itself more than once, and then drew a grid and discovered the existence of times tables while the class was still supposed to be learning addition. Stella Nyquist processed information as patterns, as systems of cause-and-effect, as polyrhythmic semantic narratives. She did not see the world in a linear way, she saw it as an abstract composition. She saw it like she was one of the ladies of Bletchley Park. And, in order to understand Stella Nyquist, you needed to hear the way her voice changed when she was alone. You needed to understand that every single detail of her usual external presentation, even down to her facial tics, was a reflexive optimization. Trauma has its ways of recognizing itself.

"So," Stella'd begun, "I mean, okay, I think it's important we talk first." Ingrid sat down on the couch. Turned her body to Stella, pulled her knees up. Leaned forward, brushed a strand of hair off of Stella's face. "Non-negotiables." She said. Eye contact. "Yeah. Or, well, I mean, liiiiiiike, it's important we both make clear our terms. And if they aren't compatible, we kill this now." "You've done this before?" Stella blinked. "No." She stated. "Have you?" Broke eye contact, glanced to the right. "No. You just seemed like you knew what you were doing." Ingrid replied. Stella looked back at her. "I mean, you'd be my first, I don't, I've never -" her eyes darted down, then to the side again, "I just think it's important that we're on the same page about everything." "I agree." Stella inhaled quietly. Nodded in acknowledgment. "Do you want to go first or should I?" she said. "You're fine." Stella nodded again. Slower this time. "Condition one: we take everything a step at a time to make sure we're both comfortable with it; condition two: what happens tonight stays here." She looked back at Ingrid. Ingrid was silent for a moment, glanced downwards. Eyebrows furrowed a bit. Stella's heart hammered about a mile a goddamned minute. Thirty seconds passed. Ingrid looked back up. "I accept your conditions." She said. Nodded slightly. "Mine are the same, I have nothing else to add." "Okay." Stella said.

[Theirmit]

It was interesting, how guys talked when they thought nobody was listening. Spoke about getting laid like it was some developmental milestone, like it equated to personal worth, like it made them feel like they were a man. Listed their alleged body counts by name. Once, even heard them speculate about the length each girl could fit. You've heard a few things. Apparently, you enjoyed being strangled without warning. Apparently, you once vomited on a football player's cock when it triggered your gag reflex. Apparently, you only did it in the ass, because that was god's loophole. This was all news to you, especially considering you haven't been seen naked by another human being for literally over a decade at this point.

Stella texted her dad, told him her car battery was dead, told him Ingrid was gonna give her a boost in the morning. Dad offered to give her a ride home. Stella declined, said it was fine, said Ingrid was letting her sleep on the couch. Ingrid was a girl, so dad bought it.

[Theirmit]

The first chords of the song When I’m Small by Phantogram play. Open on a close-up shot of Clay Matthews III with his head bowed, wearing full gear for the Green Bay Packers. Background’s an empty black void. Slowly, dramatically, he looks up into the camera, staring through the visor of his football helmet. He is intense, prepared, and focused. Cut to Victor Cruz, New York Giant, giving the camera a similar stare. He blinks. Cut to Danny Amendola staring for the Dallas Cowboys. “Why do these guys shave with one of the world’s best razors when they wear helmets for a living?” Cruz adjusts his helmet. Matthews tugs on his jersey. Amendola begins removing his helmet. So does Cruz. Then Matthews. “Because the best eventually take them off.” Fade to black. Fade back in on a closeup of a bronze bust of Bill Hewitt. Camera pulls back. It’s the hall of American heroes in Canton, Ohio. [+] You may notice the advertisement pulls a sleight of hand here. The image on the screen cuts to a wall of Gillette razor blades. At this point, the soundtrack skips forward to the moment of the first chorus kicking in. Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh We see the razor in the black void, sitting against its own reflection. It spins, movements mechanical like an assembly line. “The Gillette Fusion ProGlide. Precision equipment with less tug, less pull, for unrivaled comfort even on sensitive skin.” We see Clay Matthews III using it to shave. He looks at the camera. Same framing as the opening shot. “So you can go get it.” We see the product in its packaging. Then, the Gillette logo, sponsored by the NFL. “Gillette, the best a man can get.” A variation of the Gillette jingle plays, made to sound stylistically similar to When I’m Small. And the advertisement ends there. But, what about the actual song; the full thing, not sixteen “oohs” selectively isolated by a marketing firm? What did the ad choose not to present to the audience? Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh Lucy’s underground She’s got a mouth to feed Am I underground Or am I in between? Lucy’s underground She’s got a mouth to feed Am I underground Or am I in too deep? Show me love You’ve got your hand on the button now Sure enough You’ve got your hand on the button now Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh Lucy’s underground She’s never coming back Am I still alive Or has the light gone black? Take me underground Take me all the way Bring me to the fire Throw me in the flame So, show me love You’ve got your hands on the button now Sure enough You’ve got your hand on the button now I’d rather die, I’d rather die Than to be with you Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh, (Than to be with you) ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh, (I’d rather die) ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh, (I’d rather die) ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh, (I’d rather die) ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh, (I’d rather die) ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh Now, how might the ad's message have been undercut if they'd used the rest of the song? Famous man once said: "all forms of violence are quests for identity." Stella wasn't sure the extent to which she agreed with him, but she at least recognized the observations that had led him there.

Famous woman once said: "pets can be chosen by their ability to express great excitement, affection, and gratitude. Reptiles don't show much but are valued as exotica." Go back, what did this part hide? - and Stella's nose collided with Ingrid's. She pulled away a few inches, adjusted her angle. Her arms threaded under Ingrid's and wrapped around the back of her t-shirt. Held herself against her, tried to make up for the four inch height difference. Ingrid lowered herself slightly, hands on the back of Stella's head. And tears streaming down her face, Stella's eyes shut. A few seconds later, Ingrid's did too. And, faces silhouetted in the dark against the TV's glow, they allowed their lips to interlock. And it held. Sure for they first time they were wearing the right clothes. And their breathing changed. And their spines relaxed.

[Theirmit]

Stella and Ingrid stood facing each other, the length of the flatscreen apart.

Controlled environment, level playing field. Trust was important. Could back out at any point they wanted without reprisal. A safe space where they could just be what they were, just be fully human, and not have to fear salacious gossip, not have to fear evaluation, not have to fear they were being used.

A place where they could be something real.

Intimacy and vulnerability are difficult when you're someone who's been scared your whole life.

Et cetera.

One thing at a time.

Ingrid put- The following music video is French and contains scenes of artistic nudity inappropriate for American audiences under the age of eighteen, thus it has been age-restricted per YouTube's Community Guidelines. Viewer discretion is strongly advised. - put the AirPod into her right ear. Inhaled slowly, quietly. Head started subtly bopping along. Just kind of... watched the way Stella's eyes always smoldered whenever she was thinking. "Ready?" Stella said. "Ready."

Stella put the- The following music video is French and contains scenes of artistic nudity inappropriate for American audiences under the age of eighteen, thus it has been age-restricted per YouTube's Community Guidelines. Viewer discretion is strongly advised. - AirPod in her left ear. Shoulders started swaying to the beat. Slid her letterman off, let it hit the floor. Ingrid wasn't wearing a jacket; important to start on equal footing. "Ready?" "Ready." Ingrid replied.

[Theirmit]

"How do we start?" she asked. "So, I meeeean, what's least invasive?" Stella replied. "Socks?" "'I guess." One after the other, a pair of camping hedgehog print low cut socks fell to the floor. "Still okay?" "Still okay."

116 BPM, alla breve. Synth bass drum beat driving. Soundtrack for a catwalk trance. One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one

"How do we start?" Ingrid said. "So, I mean... what's the least invasive?" Stella asked. "Socks?" "'I guess." One after the other, a pair of Adidas Originals crew socks with self-love graphics embroidered by Made by Nelson fell to the floor. "Still okay?" "Still okay."

[Theirmit]

"Shirts?" "Shirt." Plain white t-shirt landed on the couch.

II. Sex [...] Scenes of passion must be treated with an honest acknowledgement of human nature and its normal reactions. Many scenes cannot be presented without arousing dangerous emotions on the part of the immature, the young or the criminal classes. Even within the limits of pure love, certain facts have been universally regarded by lawmakers as outside the limits of safe presentation. In the case of impure love, the love which society has always regarded as wrong and which has been banned by divine law, the following are important: 1. Impure love must not be presented as attractive and beautiful. 2. It must not be the subject of comedy or farce, or treated as material for laughter. 3. It must not be presented in such a way to arouse passion or morbid curiosity on the part of the audience. 4. It must not be made to seem right and permissible. 5. It general, it must not be detailed in method and manner.

"Shirts?" "Sure." Black Coach New York crop top hit the couch. Piece of popcorn landed on the floor.

[Theirmit]

"Next?" Ingrid nodded. Pair of yoga pants landed on the couch.

VII. Dances Dancing in general is recognized as an art and as a beautiful form of expressing human emotions. But dances which suggest or represent sexual actions, whether performed solo or with two or more; dances intended to excite the emotional reaction of an audience; dances with movement of the breasts, excessive body movements while the feet are stationary, violate decency and are wrong.

Stella's weight shifted heel to heel like a metronome. Shoulders square. "Next?" Ingrid nodded. Pair of high-rise Levi's skinny jeans landed behind the couch.

[Theirmit]

Camembert brushed past Ingrid's ankle. Her shoulders froze. Breath in. Heart pounding in her throat. Breath out. Quick glance up at the ceiling, perspiration on her forehead. Thump thump thump thump thump thump thump thump. Next step was sort of the plunge into the part where things started getting real. Thump thump thump thump thump thump thump thump. Thump thump thump thump thump thump thump thump. Breathe in. "Go for next?" Ingrid said. Beat of silence. "We go." Stella stated. Sports bra landed on the couch.

One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one

Tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic. Rolled her shoulders under her hair. Let them sway along. Expressionless, intense. Breathe in. Eyes watering. Lips shut tight. Tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic, head and shoulders. Okay. And breathe out. Brows narrowed. Tears streaming down again. Tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic. If this was a mistake, it was one they'd both understand. "Go for next?" Deep breath in. Shut her eyes tight. Nostrils flared. Fuck football. Fuck Sam Levinson. Fuck Abdellatif Kechiche. Fuck Gustave Courbet. This was about Stella goddamned Nyquist. "We go." Calvin Klein sports bra hit the couch.

[Theirmit]

Thumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthump Thumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthump Thumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthump Thumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthump Oh her poor heart. Ingrid avoided looking anywhere directly at Stella. Thumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthump This was crazy. Ohhhhhhhhhhh her heart was going way too fast. Thumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthump just, fuaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, Thumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthump Remember to breath out. What were they doing? This was insane. This was unreasonable. No reasonable pair of people would be doing this. Thumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthump Were her hands shaking? Thumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthump What was Stella doing? Stella wasn't even looking at her. Stella was just standing there doing her hair up. Ingrid had failed to avoid looking anywhere directly at Stella. Ingrid was staring directly at Stella. Like a deer staring into her hhhhhhhhheadlights Stella was Stella Stella was Stella Implacably poised and efficient Stella was so freaking good at doing a French braid, what the fuck Even now, Stella was Stella How could anyone be Stella? How did she do that? Ingrid'd known her a long time and she had her theories But, just, here she was What the fuck was she? Not a mannequin No, certainly not a mannequin. "Wait," Stella said. Ingrid blinked. "I think it'd be better if we switched the music to the sound system." "Okay." Ingrid said. Right-side AirPod landed on the couch.

One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two One, two, one, two, one, two, one- ... ... ... ... 144 BPM, alla breve. Four on the floor. Drum machine working it. Hey, brother, get up, check the wings Do what I do, it's what I feel Up to the sun, it won't be long And now it's time for you to run, amen, it's time to dance ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO Hey, sister, come on, kick the world The world is yours, up to you, girl It was so fun, you feel so strong And now it's time for you to burn, amen, it's time to dance-

Stella kept her eyes closed. Understood herself, knew this part'd be easier for her that way. Started tying her hair into a French braid. Tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic. Truth be told, she was terrified. Couldn't remember the last time she'd been this scared. Dwarfed anything ever to do with cheer, anything to do with school, anything to do with boys. But, you know. World works in rhythms and tempos. Figure out how to harmonize, find a groove, operate within that, you're in control of yourself. Tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic. Even with her eyes closed, knew Ingrid was staring at her. And, you know what? Maybe, when it was Ingrid, that felt nice. Maybe, when it was Ingrid, that felt humanizing. Tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic. Some music worked with a sacred geometry. Worked better when you could feel the beat in the air around you. Atmosphere was always important. "Wait," she said. "I think it'd be better if we switched the music to the sound system." "Okay." She heard Ingrid's voice respond. Left-side AirPod rolled under the couch. "Alexa, play Time To Dance Extended Version by The Shoes." She said. "Now playing Time To Dance - Extended Version, by The Shoes and Anthonin Ternant." "Thanks Alexa, you're a baaaaaaaabe."

[Theirmit]

VI. Costume General Principles: 1. The effect of nudity or semi-nudity upon the normal man or woman, and much more upon the young and upon immature persons, has been honestly recognized by all lawmakers and moralists. 2. Hence the fact that the nude or semi-nude body may be beautiful does not make its use in the films moral. For, in addition to its beauty, the effect of the nude or semi-nude body on the normal individual must be taken into consideration. 3. Nudity or semi-nudity used simply to put a "punch" into a picture comes under the head of immoral actions. It is immoral in its effect on the average audience. 4. Nudity can never be permitted as being necessary for the plot. Semi-nudity must not result in undue or indecent exposures. 5. Transparent or translucent materials and silhouette are frequently more suggestive than actual exposure.

ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO [droning metallic ringing] [droning metallic ringing] THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP [SYNTH BWAAAAA] ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE-

'Kay. Kept her eyes closed. Brow slightly furrowed. Craned her neck back, cracked a vertebrae. Breathed in deep, breathed out. Tensed her fingers. Head kicked with the percussion, braid in counterswing. ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO Drew a bead on the groove. ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO Shoulders with the synth. ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO And with the bass guitar - - OH, wow, okay, she could feel the bass all the way through to her soul - ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO - cheerleader section! She lifted her a hand to her mouth, aiming an amplifying acoustic cup in Ingrid's probable direction. ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO "T-I-M-E-T-O-D-A-N-C-E-IN-THE-CITY T-I-M-E-T-O-D-A-N-C-E-IN-THE-CITY," she called. Couldn't help grinning. ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO - aaand everything on the bass. ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO Yeah, she was just going. ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO No Ingrid. No living room. ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO Stella was alone with the music. ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO In the Stella zone. ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO [droning metallic ringing] Song hit the low-energy interlude. And Stella could hear her own thoughts again. She slowed. Took a second to catch her breath. She was having a good time right now. Like, unambiguously. Couldn't remember the last time she'd felt like this. Sorta crazy. "YOU GOOD?" she called out to Ingrid. "YEAH," she heard Ingrid's voice reply. "DO YOU STILL WANT TO KEEP GOING?" "YEAH." "GOOD." Stella said. She tentatively slid her thumbs beneath her own waistband. "I LOVE YOU." Ingrid's voice said. OHHHH Stella's heart- [SYNTH BWAAAAA] - aaaaaaaand back into the music. ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO DANCEDANCEDANCEDANCEDANCEDANCEDANCEDANCE ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO DANCEDANCEDANCEDANCEDANCEDANCEDANCEDANCE ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO DANCEDANCEDANCEDANCEDANCEDANCEDANCEDANCE ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO DANCEDANCEDANCEDANCEDANCEDANCEDANCEDANCE ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO DANCEDANCEDANCEDANCEDANCEDANCEDANCEDANCE Stella stopped. CHEER SECTION! "T-I-M-E-T-O-D-A-N-C-E-IN-THE-CITY," she chanted. And then, the call-and-response. "T-T--I--I--M-E-T-O-D--METOD--A--A--N--N--C-E-IN-THE-CITY," Ingrid joined her. The rest hit the couch. She opened her eyes.

ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO [droning metallic ringing] [droning metallic ringing] THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP [SYNTH BWAAAAA] ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE TWO ONE-

VI. Costume 1. Complete nudity is never permitted. This includes nudity in fact or in silhouette, or any lecherous or licentious notice thereof by other characters in the picture. 2. Undressing scenes should be avoided, and never used save where essential to the plot. 3. Indecent or undue exposure is forbidden. 4. Dancing or costumes intended to permit undue exposure or indecent movements in the dance are forbidden.

[Theirmit]

Picture this: You're in a private dressing room at Nordstrom. You compulsively check every corner for cameras. Just in case.

Famous woman once wrote: There's the sensation of a lot of flesh when every single hair stands up. This happens when you are cold and naked, aroused, or simply terrified.

And, there they both stood. Everything they were as human beings. Those first few seconds were the scariest. The acute feeling of exposure; the sudden chill that arrives with the awareness that the air creeping against your back no longer stops at your hips. The deep, primal panic at the moment you realize there's someone there, observing you, taking note, using you; the instinctual reflex from your lizard brain to make yourself small, to cover yourself behind any convenient scenery. Goosebumps raised. Blood flooding to the lungs. Eyes carefully appraising the other's across the room. Are we still us? ... Can I still be myself around you? ... ... "Alexa, off." ... ... Are you still yourself? ... ... ... ... Just two people. That was all they were. ... ... ... ... ... Ingrid was just grinning like a freaking maniac, eyes and everything. Like, AAAAAAAH, oh my GOD??? "Hiiiiiii," Stella said. "AAAAAH WE DID IT. WE'RE DOING IT." Stella broke eye contact. She scooped her foot down and backwards into her letterman like an excavator. Cautiously lifted it up behind her with her toes, snatched the jacket into her hand. And, with her left hand, she draped the letterman by its sleeve over her same-side shoulder. Kept her hand resting there against her own chest, elbow bent and jutting out at an angle. Her right hand rested by its fingertips against her thigh. She turned her head to the left, aligned it with her shoulder. Brow narrowed, face expressionless. Eyes smoldered into the middle-distance. Then, she put her left leg forward slightly, knee bent; right leg holding most of her weight. Let her shoulders and her hips rest contrapposto, s-curving her torso. Lifted her left heel off the ground slightly like she'd started taking a step. Held the pose. Ingrid took a step closer. Then another. Stella stared out at her from the corner of her eye. Her face softened slightly; corners of her lips crept up. "LOOK AT YOU!" Ingrid squeed. Stella cackled.

Famous woman once wrote: It can be startling to see someone's breath, let alone the breathing of a crowd. You don't believe that people extend that far.

Picture this: You're making conversation with friends, standing on the Strip. Mentally, you're charting the quickest route to sturdy cover in case of a vehicle ramming attack. Someone taps you on the shoulder. Even through the letterman you're wearing, you flinch.

[Theirmit]

The New York Times SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 5, 1961 NOT WHAT IT SEEMS Homosexual Motif Gets Heterosexual Guise By HOWARD TAUBMAN It is time to speak openly and candidly of the increasing incidence and influence of homosexuality on New York's stage - and, indeed, in the other arts as well. The subject is too important to be left forever to the sly whisperers and malicious gossips. Criticism, like playwriting, is crippled by a resort to evasions. The public is deluded and misled if polite pretenses are accepted at face value. The infiltration of homosexual attitudes occurs in the theatre at many levels. It is noticeable when a male designer dresses the girls in a musical to make them unappealing and disrobes the boys so that more male skin is visible than art or illusion require. It is apparent in a vagrant bit of nasty dialogue thrown into a show or in a redundant touch like two unmistakably mannish females walking across a stage without a reason or a word of comment. These intrusions are private jokes turned public in a spirit of defiance or in the fun-and-games exuberance of a mischievous student testing a teacher's patience and acumen, They may be nuisances, deserving the flick aimed at a pestiferous insect, but do not merit serious discussion. What demands frank analysis is the indirection that distorts human values. Plays on adult themes are couched in terms and symbols that do not truly reflect the author's mind. Characters represent something different from what they purport to be. It is no wonder that they seem sicker than necessary and that the plays are more subtly disturbing than the playwright perhaps intended. Exaggeration The unpleasant female of the species is exaggerated into a fantastically consuming monster or an incredibly pathetic drab. The male is turned into a ragingly lustful beast or into a limp, handsome neutral creature of otherworldly purity. No doubt there are such people, and it is the dramatist's business if he is fascinated by them. But when his emphases are persistently disproportionate, it is because he is treating a difficult, delicate problem in the guise of normality. The insidious result of unspoken taboos is that sincere, searching writers feel they must state a homosexual theme in heterosexual situations. They convince themselves that what they wish to say will get through anyhow. But dissembling is unhealthy. The audience senses rot at the drama's core. The taboos are not what they used to be. Homosexuality is not a forbidden topic. In "The Best Man" it was the dark secret used to destroy a ruthless, young politician, and in "Advise and Consent" it was a sympathetically described aberration of a Senator. In both cases it was a facile dramatic device, used without compelling force or overriding need. As long ago as in "The Children's Hour" Lillian Hellman dealt honestly and powerfully with a lesbian theme. There have been a number of works in which problems of homosexuality were probed with directness and integrity. Tennessee Williams' "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof," Robert Anderson's "Tea and Sympathy" and Peter Shaffer's "Five Finger Exercise" did not dissimulate, and in "A Taste of Honey" a homosexual was portrayed without meanness or snickers. Although these are examples of successful plays on delicate themes, there can be no blinking the fact that heterosexual audiences feel uncomfortable in the presence of truth-telling about sexual deviation. And there can be no denying that playwrights interested in such themes continue to attack them tangentially, even disagreeably and sneakily. Falsehood That is why the work of some talented writers seems tainted. That is why studies ostensibly devoted to the tensions between men and women carry an uneasy burden of falsehood. One suspects what is wrong. But how can one question a writer's professed intentions or impugn motivations hidden in his heart, if not his subconscious? What, if anything, is to be done? A writer's way may be oblique. Art, in any case, is often an ordering and articulation of unknowable and indefinable pressures. But where the writer knows what is in his mind and would like to expose it uncompromisingly, it is a great pity if he fails to do so. Homosexuality has been a fact of history for thousands of years. It is a fact of life, even if a generally concealed one, in our society. Nothing human should be alien to an enlightened theatre. But even such a theatre must face up to the rules of commerce. Playwrights no doubt will continue to take what they regard as the safe way of smuggling a touchy subject onto the stage by heterosexual masquerade. Hugh Wheeler is a playwright whose first plays have tried to speak out. In "Big Fish, Little Fish" he described at least one homosexual in rich, crotchety, affectionate detail. This was forthright writing. But the central character was ambiguous, and at least one other man posed questions. Rightly or wrongly, one felt that these two did not fully sum up the author's conception of them. Explicit In "Look: We've Come Through" Mr. Wheeler was explicit. There was no doubt about the homosexual predilections of the boy, Bobby. His mother encouraged effeminacy and urged him to take up with an older man. A brutal sailor sought to abuse him. The boy admitted his impotence. He wanted only to be a friend of Belle, the girl with learning, culture and no sex appeal. Why then find fault with a play that did not obfuscate? Why not acclaim without reservation a writer of humor, warmth and acute sensibility? It is painful to mention flaws in a work of aspiration while one approves a superficial, expertly made entertainment like "Write Me a Murder." But each type of play must be judged by its own laws. The fundamental flaw of "Look: We've Come Through" was that one did not believe in the pivotal boy-and-girl relationship as the thing it looked to be. Bobby was revealed with sympathy as a sad, passive homosexual in spite of himself. It was suggested that he was changing, but everything about him said he would not. The girl was made to appear sexless. Her first joust with sex was an intellectual experiment. While the end was touching as the maimed youngsters found security in each other, one was sure that it would not last. It could not last while she remained a woman and he the sort of man he was. For all its virtues, the play was lamed. For all his courage, had Mr. Wheeler dared enough? Did inhibitions imposed by the theme lead to a sense of troubling incompletion? Mr. Wheeler has been brave to go as far as he has in writing about homosexuality with probity. His way is infinitely preferable to the furtive, leering insinuations that have contaminated some of our arts-

CONFIDENTIAL UNITED STATES ATOMIC ENERGY COMMISSION WASHINGTON 25, D. C. June 8, 1953 Honorable Sterling Cole Chairman, Joint Committee on Atomic Energy Congress of the United States Dear Mr. Cole This is with reference to your letter of May 20, 1953, in which you advise that it is your understanding that the Commission has granted "Q" clearance to seven individuals as to whom FBI field investigation (U) reports contain substantial evidence of homosexuality. We assume that you have reference to cases which Mr. Francis Cotter of the Joint Committee Staff discussed with our Director of Security and a member of his staff on May 19, 1953. Category (B) of the AEC Criteria lists those classes of derogatory information where the extent of activities, the attitudes, or convictions of the individual must be weighed in determining whether a presumption of security risk exists. Sub-category (B). 9 of the Criteria would apply to those cases where there are grounds sufficient to establish a reasonable belief that with respect to the individual there is: "Manifest tendencies demonstrating unreliability or inability to keep important matters confidential; willful or gross carelessness in revealing or disclosing to any unauthorized person restricted data or other classified matter pertaining either to projects of the Atomic Energy Commission or of any other governmental agency; abuse of trust, dishonesty; or homosexuality." In discussing the cases with Mr. Cotter, it was pointed out that under the Commission's present security program, the information in each case. must be very carefully considered to determine whether there are grounds sufficient to establish a reasonable belief that the individual is homosexual; that where substantial evidence of homosexuality is present clearance is withheld and determination of the individual's clearance eligibility is made in accordance with our security clearance procedures. The discussion with Mr. Cotter centered on eight cases, the administrative handling of which we summarize below as A through H. CASE A A was employed by the United States Engineers, Manhattan District, at Los Alamos, from November 12, 1943, to January 4, 1945, and from February 23, 1945, to May 21, 1946. She was also employed by the Zia Company at Los Alamos from November 1, 1946, to September 30, 1947, but had no access to restricted data and was not granted clearance at Los Alamos though a background investigation was conducted. The Los Alamos file on A was forwarded to Hanford on October 23, 1948. On April 27, 1949, A was granted "Q" clearance for employment at Hanford as a clerk with the General Electric Company. This clearance was terminated on April 4, 1952, as a result of A's voluntary resignation of her employment with General Electric. On December 11, 1952, the Hanford office requested the Federal Bureau of Investigation to conduct additional investigation in A's case in order that consideration might be given to reinstatement of her clearance for service with General Electric Company as a steno-typist. The reports of investigation were received in the Division of Security and were forwarded to the Hanford office on May 1, 1953. Because of the information reported, clearance reinstatement for A has been withheld and it is expected that her clearance eligibility will be determined by use of the Commission's security clearance procedures. CASE B B was first employed at the Los Alamos project on July 9, 1943. She was granted "Q" clearance by the Atomic Energy Commission on November 14, 1947, for employment as clerk with the University of California. (This clearance was granted following advice from the Commission's former Director of Security to the Manager of Operations at Los Alamos that reported information concerning B, as of that time, was not considered as being of a nature to require adverse clearance action.) B voluntarily resigned her employment with the University of California on May 24, 1952, and her clearance was terminated. The Los Alamos Scientific Laboratory requested reinstatement of B's clearance on August 26, 1952. In view of the previously reported derogatory information, additional investigation was requested of the Federal Bureau of Investigation concerning Bas a basis for making the required clearance determination. The reports of supplemental investigation were received in the Division of Security and were forwarded to the Los Alamos office on May 5, 1953. Because of the reported derogatory information in the reports of investigation, reinstatement of clearance for B has been withheld and it is expected that her eligibility for security clearance will be determined. by use of the Commission's security clearance procedures. CASE C C has been employed at Hanford since August 20, 1944. She was granted "Q" clearance on November 26, 1948, for employment by General Electric Company as a computer in the transportation department following receipt of investigation reports from the Federal Bureau of Investigation which contained no derogatory information. As a result of information developed by FBI in connection with the supplemental investigation of A completed in April 1953, the investigation conducted by FBI developed information which has raised a serious question of C's eligibility for continued security clearance. It is expected that this question will be resolved by use of the Commission's security clearance procedures. CASE D D has been continuously employed at Hanford since May 27, 1948, and was granted "Q" clearance on September 26, 1948, for service as a laborer in the Health Estimate Department, General Electric Company, following a review of a background investigation by FBI which contained no derogatory information. She is still employed in the same job though it is now called "Technical Clerk". There has been no reported information to show that D has engaged in homosexual activity. The only information with possible derogatory implications with respect to D was reported in supplementary reports of investigation in the cases of A and C, dated in March and April, 1953, respectively, which indicate that after D left her residence with C in 1952, she lived temporarily with D. In this connection it is noted that D, when interviewed in the C case, advised that she had known A well since 1948 and described her as a quiet reserved person of good moral character. She stated that A was closely associated with C, and as far as she knew, C kept good associations and was of good moral character. A review of D's file furnishes no sound basis for conclusion that she has been or is a homosexual. Additional investigation of D has been requested under the Commission's current reinvestigation program. CASE E E was first employed at Hanford February 16, 1944, as a clerk with the Corps of Engineers, Manhattan District. She was granted "Q" clearance on January 19, 1948, for service as a payroll auditing clerk with the AEC, following a review of investigation reports by the FBI which contained (4) no derogatory information. E was married in 1947 to another Hanford employee, and is presently reported to be on maternity leave, as a result of which her clearance was terminated on February 2, 1953. There has been no reported information to show that E has engaged in homosexual activity. The information with possible derogatory implications is contained in reports of investigation dated in March and April, 1953, in the cases of A and C, respectively. The reports in the A and C cases contain testimony of a confidential informant that indicates E was closely associated with C in connection with baseball team activity in 1947 or 1948; and other members of the team had reported that when the team traveled to various cities to play games, E had vigorous quarrels with another woman (no longer in the AEC program) as to who would share a room with C. In this connection it is noted that when the other woman and E were interviewed in connection with the C case, each said that C kept good associations and was of good moral character. A review of E's file furnishes no sound basis for conclusion that she has been or is a homosexual. CASE F F was stationed at Los Alamos from 1944 to September 24, 1945, as a member of the Womens Army Corps. She was transferred from Los Alamos on the latter date and was separated from the military service on December 8, 1945, by reason of demobilization. She received an honorable discharge. On February 19, 1948, she made application for employment as a clerk with the University of California. F was granted "Q" clearance on June 30, 1948, and entered on duty with the University of California on July 14, 1948. F was married to another employee at Los Alamos on February 9, 1949, and in October 1950 resigned her position as secretary with the University of California. On March 5, 1952, she was reemployed at Los Alamos to serve as IBM operator with the Los Alamos Scientific Laboratory and her "Q" clearance was reinstated on January 21, 1952. There is no reported information to show that F has engaged in homosexual activity. There is reported information that while in the Womens Army Corps at Los Alamos she was associated with several girls who had reputations as lesbians; and that she was transferred from Los Alamos because of an alleged close friendship with a lieutenant in the Womens Army Corps. Other than the reported association, no person interviewed during the course of the investigation could furnish any information concerning F to show homosexual tendencies. As is indicated above, F has been married since February 1949 and persons interviewed by FBI in 1951 stated that F's associates at that time did not include any former members of the Womens Army Corps but instead, friends of her husband, and their wives, all of whom are of good repute. A review of F's file furnishes no sound basis for conclusion that she has been or is a homosexual. Additional investigation of F has been requested-

The New York Times SUNDAY, MARCH 24, 1974 Bisexual Life-Style Appears to Be Spreading and Not Necessarily Among 'Swingers' By JANE E. BRODY A small but apparently growing number Americans are practicing bisexuality, an age‐old but still largely mysterious life‐style that is just beginning to come under the scrutiny of scientific study. While in recent years a dozen or so prominent persons ranging from the feminist author Kate Millett to the rock singer David Bowie have publicly proclaimed their sexual interests in both men and women, most bisexuals remain underground, carefully guarding their secret from everyone, especially those closest to them. Many of these people are married and, according to the preliminary findings of one study, they fear that disclosure of their homosexual activities would hurt their families and possibly wreck their marriages. Various Groups Involved This study, now under way at the University of Washington in Seattle, indicates that bisexuality occurs among various groups, including blue‐collar workers, truck drivers, professionals and housewives as well as students, entertainers, writers, group sex participants and other “swingers.” No one yet knows what percentage of Americans are currently practicing bisexuals, but at most they are believed to make up only a tiny segment of the total population. Based on the late Dr. Alfred C. Kinsey's data and other more recent surveys, specialists in human sexuality estimate that about 25 per cent of men and half that percentage of women have had sexual relations to the point of orgasm with both men and women at some time in their adult lives. The incidence of bisexuality among men is believed not to have changed much since Dr. Kinsey did his studies in the late nineteen‐forties, but the specialists say that in recent years they have noted a definite increase in bisexuality among women. Dr. Richard Green, psychiatrist at the University of California at Los Angeles, where he directs the Gender Identity Research Treatment Program, said that the change among women had been “partly for political reasons a feminine‐liberating thing as they dissociate themselves from the extraordinary dependency they've had on men all these years.” Dr. Pepper Schwartz, a sociologist, who is conducting the study of bisexuals at the University of Washington, said that bisexuality helps some in the women's movement “to feel closer to their sisters.” But for most female bisexuals, Drs. Green and Schwartz say, ideology is not the motivation. Rather, as Dr. Green commented, in American culture it is “easier, less painful, for a woman to have a homosexual experience than it is for a man. There isn't the same societal stigma attached to it. The way male children are raised, being manly closely linked with being heterosexual. But females are not socialized in the same way, so a lesbian experience less of a threat to a woman's feelings of feminineness.” Aside from these tentative observations, little else of fact is known about bisexuality. “There just hasn't been any serious study of the phenomenon,” Dr. Schwartz said. Dr. Green calls it “the biggest remaining mystery in the sexual field.” In the absence of a study of hard data, there has been much argument among professionals as to what, in fact, bisexuality is, whether it is a “normal,” “natural,” “healthy” or stable life‐style, whether people are born with or learn bisexual inclinations, whether bisexuals are really homosexuals who have retained some capacity for heterosexual behavior or who have been forced into heterosexuality by societal proscriptions on its alternative. The Orthodox Theory The belief that bisexuality is abnormal and unhealthy is held by those who subscribe to orthodox psychiatric theory. For example, Dr. Natalie Shainess, psychiatrist in Manhattan, says: “Nature over the millennia went to great deal of trouble to differentiate sex organs so they would line up properly and produce offspring. Bisexuality has to imply serious psychological and emotional hurt.” However, Dr. Lonny Myers, director of medical education at Chicago's Midwest Association for the Study of Human Sexuality, which last fall held the first scientific conference on bisexuality. believes that “bisexuality is normal and healthy.” “There is no scientific evidence that there is anything harmful about people of the same sex having sex together,” she said in an interview. Dr. Myers added, “If not for social brainwashing and cultural taboos, people could relate sexually to people of both sexes.” Dr. Duane E. Spiers, psychologist and sex therapist in Omaha and director of Creighton University Medical School's Behavioral Sciences Division, agrees. He said, “I think we're all born potentially bisexual and are conditioned by social and family experiences to develop either hetero, homo or ambisexual patterns.” On the other hand, Dr. Green, who says “there are more views on bisexuality than there are bisexuals,” noted that “in every animal, there is a prenatal biological program for heterosexuality. Why should the human being be different? The difference is in postnatal influences, to which human beings are much more vulnerable.” Until this issue is at least partly resolved-

- Stella cackled.

And then she caught her breath for a sec. One two, one two, breathe. She unfurled her letterman and started slipping it on, left arm first.

Ingrid stared.

"Keep going?"

Ingrid opened her mouth to say something. Immediately closed it.

"If you don't want to, that's totally-"

Ingrid took two backward steps, and then, like a bisexual or something, did a 360° pivot spin and shot Stella with a finger gun.

"...sorry, that's a yes?"

"Yes."

One two, one two, breathe. Right arm.
Things were happening that neither of them could ever take back.
Breathe. Just breathe. Okay.
Okay.

"Can I pick the next song?"

"Mmkay."

"Alexa, play Get Innocuous (Soulwax Remix) by LCD Soundsystem."

Oh, of course Ingrid would choose-

"Now playing Get Innocuous! (Soulwax Remix) by LCD Soundsystem and Soulwax." Alexa said.

[Theirmit]

. . . "- and everything you do, everything you do, you're so freaking good at it, and it's insane. It's insane." Ingrid said. "I just do what I'm good at." Stella said. "When I saw you, when - remember the Halloween you came to school as a flapper girl? When you sat next to me in Ms. Holland's class, I saw you, and I saw you had just this absolutely breathtaking cat eyeliner on, and I just," she looked away from Ingrid, "I just started, like, analyzing the way your face fit together geometrically, and-" She blinked. "-I began realizing I thought you were gorgeous-" Ingrid's heart fluttered- -BWAABWAABWAABWAABWAABWAABWAA -wwwwwwwwwwwwwwWhoaaa, god, here they went - -BWAABWAABWAABWAABWAABWAABWAA-

. . . -PopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPop Bew Bew PopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPop Bew Bew PopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPop Bew Bew PopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPop Bew Bew PopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPop Bew Bew PopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPopPop Bew Bew BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA GET INNOCUOUS!-

. . . "- and everything you do, everything you do, you're so freaking good at it, and it's insane. It's insane." Ingrid said. Bew Bew "Usually I'm just doing what I know I'm going to be good at." Stella said. Bew Bew She inhaled sharply, shakily. Bew Bew "When I saw you, when - remember the Halloween you came to school as a flapper girl? When you sat next to me in Ms. Holland's class, I saw you, and I saw you h-had just this absolutely breathtaking cat's eye eyeliner on, and I just," her gaze flitted away from Ingrid's, stared up through the popcorn ceiling, "I-I just started, like, seeing the way your face fit together geometrically, and-" Bew Bew She blinked, hesitated. Sniffled. Bew Bew "-I just, I, I-I began realizing I thought you were gorgeous-" -BWAABWAABWAABWAABWAABWAABWAA -OoaoOAoAOaoAOaAOAgH. BWAABWAABWAABWAABWAABWAABWAA Stella allowed the bass drop to assume direct control. BWAABWAABWAABWAABWAABWAABWAA Breathing slowed, heartrate up. BWAABWAABWAABWAABWAABWAABWAA Eyes wild, spine tingling, higher cognitive functions mmmmelting? BWAABWAABWAABWAABWAABWAABWAA Swimming to Ingrid Mueller in the sea of sound. BWAABWAABWAABWAABWAABWAABWAA She wrapped her arms around Ingrid's upper back. BWAABWAABWAABWAABWAABWAABWAA GET INNOCUOUS! And she kissed Ingrid on the throat.

[Theirmit]

- eschewing traditional materials of art-making entirely and instead using ready-made photographic images cut from the pages of illustrated magazines, newspapers and advertising. The technique, which was quickly embraced by their fellow Dada artists, transformed clichéd representations of daily life and contemporary culture into profoundly modern artworks, whose dynamic content challenged the status quo of German politics and society. Höch was at the very forefront of the evolution of the medium, and through the late teens and early 1920s she created a series of highly sophisticated, groundbreaking images that subverted and skewered the tropes of the mass-media from a distinctly feminine perspective. One of Höch’s most famous and iconic photomontages from this revolutionary period, Das schöne Madchen takes aim at the modern representations of women that proliferated through German society during these years. Cutting, snipping, and slicing images from an array of print sources, she turns the idea of a traditional portrait of a beautiful young woman, as suggested by the title, on its head. At the heart of the composition is an elegantly quaffed, bobbed head of hair, carefully cut out to preserve the shape and style of the hair-do, which looms large above all the other elements in the scene. The face of its owner, however, has been deliberately removed and filled by a snippet of a magazine advertisement, while below a woman in a swimsuit poses with a parasol, her head similarly replaced by the image of a lightbulb. Indeed, only one female face is visible within the scene, that of the figure in the upper right-hand corner who gazes out at the viewer, one of her eyes almost comically enlarged, plucked from another source and pasted over her features. The women are surrounded by symbols of mechanisation and modernity – the swimsuit-clad figure appears to be perched atop an industrial bench or I-beam, while an enormous tyre and a crank shaft flank her on either side. Perhaps most strikingly, however, Höch arranges dozens of perfectly circular BMW logos of varying sizes across the composition, layering the insignia in a dynamic pattern that serves as a colourful, graphic backdrop to the other carefully arranged elements within the photomontage. Playing with scale and the materiality of her various source imagery, leaving the cuts, junctures and joins of her collage fully visible to the viewer, Höch highlights the constructed, fragmented nature of the image she has created. In this way, she deliberately challenges the legibility of these familiar advertising and magazine graphics, divorcing them from their original context and reordering the imagery in such a way that the viewer is forced to reconsider not only the objective truth of the photograph, but also the underlying messaging behind these sources. In Das schöne Madchen, for example, Höch delivers an insightful critique of the ways in which the female body was presented in fashion magazines and contemporary advertising, marketed to audiences as a commercial product in much the same way as an automobile. In particular, her use of machine-imagery throughout the composition shines a spotlight on the ways in which the media constructed, manufactured and manipulated the image of the Neue Frau, or New Woman – a Weimar feminist ideal that trumpeted financial, political and sexual liberation for women in the years following the First World War – for commercial profit. ‘For me,’ Höch later explained, ‘art has always been a means for making statements, including criticisms’-

. . . - You can normalize BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA Don't it make you feel alive BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA You can normalize BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA Don't it make you feel alive BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA You can normalize BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA Don't it make you feel alive BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA You can normalize BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA Don't it make you feel alive BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA You can normalize BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA Don't it make you feel alive BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA You can normalize BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA Don't it make you feel alive BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA You can normalize BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA Don't it make you feel alive BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA You can normalize BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA Don't it make you feel-

. . . - and through the fabric of her letterman, Stella could feel Ingrid's fingers pressing down into her back, into her shoulder blades. And a jolt of tension radiated from her skin, to her spinal cord, then to her muscles. She did not allow it to show, smothered the reflex. Ingrid looked down into Stella's eyes. She blinked. Stella did not blink. Head nodding along to the beat. Ingrid blinked again and pulled Stella in closer. Stella brought her hand up and brushed the hair out of Ingrid's eyes. And Ingrid pulled Stella in even closer. Stella moved her face closer to Ingrid's. And, room spinning around them, tears running down both their faces, their lips interlocked once more. And they held it, eyes open.

. . . - You can normalize BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA Don't it make you feel alive BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA You can normalize BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA Don't it make you feel alive BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA You can normalize BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA Don't it make you feel alive BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA You can normalize BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA Don't it make you feel alive BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA You can normalize BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA Don't it make you feel alive BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA You can normalize BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA Don't it make you feel alive BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA You can normalize BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA Don't it make you feel alive BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA You can normalize BWABWABWABWABWABWABWA Don't it make you feel-

- drawing is clear and sharp; her painting smooth with extreme skill and mastering of craft. Her paintings remind us of the classics in museums but with infinitely more seduction and sensitivity. This is not really realistic painting: she could be called realistic if the term were enlarged. Her art is not cold despite its precision. Her portraits are alive and even hallucinatory” (quoted in L. Claridge, Tamara de Lempicka: A Life of Deco and Decadence, New York, 1999, pp. 174-175). The identities of the two women who posed for Les deux amies are unknown—Lempicka was an inveterate party-goer and did not hesitate to solicit those who caught her eye to pose. Having said this, the sharp aquiline nose, long neck and full lips of the blonde figure seen in profile may be seen to echo many of the artist’s own features, suggesting the figure is something of a self-portrait. Similarly, the dark hair and curvaceous form of the second woman could perhaps be a portrait of Ira Perrot, Lempicka’s closest female friend, confidante, and lover, with whom she enjoyed a relationship for almost a decade. Graced with hazel eyes, a thin oval face, and raven hair, Perrot appeared more frequently than any other sitter in Lempicka’s paintings during the ten-year period ending in 1932, sitting for both portraits as well as providing the inspiration for protagonists in a number of the artist’s nude figure groupings. Indeed, Perrot is said to have posed for the shapely reclining figure in the lower right foreground of Lempicka’s grand composition Femmes au bain, of 1929 (Blondel, no. 120; Private collection). The physical proximity of the women on the balcony combined with their relaxed demeanor in the face of one another’s nudity imbues the scene with a heady eroticism, suggesting the pair enjoy a more intimate connection than just friendship. However, unlike Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec’s paintings of female lovers, Lempicka focuses less on physical lust or the passionate liaisons of her characters, and more on the quiet, amorous moments that exist within a relationship. This direct expression of female sensuality—voluptuous, passionate, but still within the bounds of good taste—was central to the allure of Lempicka’s art during this period, and perhaps explains her decision to exhibit Les deux amies at the Salon d’Automne-

[Theirmit]

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...

- And they held it, eyes open. Ingrid nodded her head slightly. 'Kay. Well, so, they were just gonna do this then. Oh, whatever. Through her nose, Stella let out the breath she'd been holding. Made a little silent noise in back of her throat. Noticed heat rising up through her body, into her chest, into her face, j-just, some crazy chemical instinct thing in her brain or something. Good kind of goosebumps, she thought. Tiiiiiingling. Something was- Acclimated to Ingrid's heartbeat, tuned out the music. She allowed her eyes to close. And she felt as Ingrid's right hand started tracing up to hold the side of her face. And her weight sank against hers. Lips still interlocked. And - And Stella mentally took a moment, tried to figure out what the hell she was actually supposed be doing in a situation like this. Because, like, yknow, this whole thing was basically completely fucking alien to her, just absolutely paralyzing, she was in just way over her head. Like, literally she'd never even, like, mm... well, for whatever film censors were still in the audience for some reason, she was gonna call it "listening to the song Love Myself by Hailee Steinfeld". Never made love to a bath jet, et cetera. Sometimes thought about maybe trying it, liiiiiiiiike, as an intellectual exercise. She knew how to, probably, maybe. Hadn't been completely failed by the sex-ed curriculum. But it was never something she'd manifested as anything past an abstract idea. So, like, yeah, no, she didn't know what the fuck she was supposed to be doing with Ingrid here. Flying utterly blind. Took her best guess. Left hand began a migration southbound.

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