Greetings, fellas!
I am, indeed, that guy. I was just boppin around and thought I might take the occasion of my schedule lightening up a bit to offer my services a critique-er in order to catch up on some of the parts of V7 that I missed (notably most of pregame) and to take the time and read certain threads through a more deliberate lens than I may have upon first glance.
I don't really have a specific gimmick as to how I'm handling my critiques beyond trying to lay them out as thoroughly and honestly as I can while hopefully maintaining a constructive tone. I might be a bit goofy with stuff, but rest assured, I am a complete genius who knows exactly what he is doing.
Two things to note before you start typing away to get your kids in the queue:
- For the time being, I will be focusing solely on v7 participants who have died. If there comes a point where I have read through all the dead kids (or at least the dead kids whose handlers are interested in critiques) at a given time, then I may move on to those still alive. Until we come to such a point, though, this policy stands.
- For now, I will be limiting the queue to five and will not be accepting any further requests until those five have been completed.
Queue Status: CLOSED
1) Danny Chamnanma (Melusine)
2) Philip Olivares (MurderWeasel)
3) Dante Valerio (Fenris)
4) Bree Jones (KamiKaze)
5) Mikki Swift (Brackie)
V9 pregame is now open!
Hey kid, want a critique? (V7 Edition)
One of my kids is dead so I have more brainspace to devote to other SotF-related noise
This is the critique board, suggested by Outfoxd. Come here to request critiques and critique the work of others. The goal of this board is to be a respectful environment conducive to the improvement of writing skills.
- Catche Jagger
- Posts: 345
- Joined: Thu May 23, 2019 12:39 am
Hey kid, want a critique? (V7 Edition)
Post by Catche Jagger »
- [+] sig
- [+] V7
-
B078 - Thomas Buckley: "Holy- yes, I am scared because I am not ignorant to the world around me. What the fuck are you talking about ‘am I scared’?”
Status: DECEASED
Memory: 1 | Pregame: 1-2 | Trip: 1
V7: 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9
G078 - Sapphire Waters: “It’s okay, Emmett…”
Status: DECEASED
Pregame: 1
V7: 1-2-3-4
B079 - Colin McCabe: “Hey you murderous prick! Tell me how the fucking dirt tastes!”
Status: DECEASED
Pregame: 1-2
V7: 1-2-3-4-5-6-7
"I'm refined, I'm cultured. I'm a fashionista. I'm everything you're not and never will be." - Ali Grayston, 2006
- Grand Moff Hissa
- Posts: 2756
- Joined: Thu Aug 09, 2018 1:37 am
Post by Grand Moff Hissa »
I'd love to hear your take on Phillip Olivares.
I bid you all dark greetings!
hello sir i have a dante hes in my signature and stuff. hes a nice boy
"Well, Fenris, the King of Gossip. We meet again."
- [+] v7
-
the dead:
[B040] Dante Valerio - Fell asleep too early.
[V7] [x] [x] [x]
[Pregame] Then: None Now: [Start] Prom: [Start] Trip: [Start]
[G014] Apollonia "Nia" Karahalios - T-R-I-E-D.
[V7] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x]
[Pregame] Then: [Start] Now: [Start] Prom: None Trip: [Start]
[B004] Axel Fontaine - Lost his place.
[V7] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x]
[Pregame] Then: [Start] Now: [Start] Prom: [Start] Trip: [Start]
[G041] Ivy Langley - Together forever.
[V7] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x]
[Pregame] Then: [Start] Now: [Start] Prom: [Start] Trip: [Start]
the living:
Artem Fyodorov - Desperate.
[Meanwhile] [x] [x] [x]
[Pregame] Then: [Start] Now: [Start] Prom: [Start]
Zen Alicea Feliciano - On vacation!
[Meanwhile] [x]
[Pregame] Then: [Start] Now: [Start] Prom: [Start]
hey I'd love some Mikki thots
- [+] The Island
- V4: G069 - Clio Gabriella: Hold me closer, tiny dancer; count the headlights on the highway to hell.
V4: G083 - Paige Strand: Feelings don't try to hurt you, even the painful ones. You're responsible for all of the damn consequences.
V4: B118 - Jacob Charles: Every grieving heart has screamed at one time or another 'why can't you just let me die?'
V4: G114 - Aston Bennett: A woman who desires revenge must dig three graves.
V4: B108 - Ma'afu Tuigamala: Most men would rather forget a hard truth than face it.
V5: G015 - Janie Sinneave: Every human being must find her own way to cope with the impossible, and the only job of a true friend is to facilitate whatever method she doesn't choose.
V6: B018 - Maxim Kehlenbrink: Too much self-centered attitude brings isolation. Result: loneliness, fear, anger, and a hammer to the skull.
V7: G044 - Mikki Swift: It takes 18 years to build a reputation and a minute to ruin it.
V7: G070 - Jessica Rennes: Despair is our chance to wrestle with water and fall through.
V7: G075 - Aditi Sharma: She can still scream that rebel yell, just as loud as it was in 2005.
- [+] Home
-
V4: B042 - Brendan Wallace: History has a way of repeating itself for years to come.
Meanwhile...
v5 - Penny Huang: Good girls can make bad decisions.
v5 - Jasper Rourke: Of all the words of mice and men, the saddest are, "what could have been".
v7 - Gaelan Meloy: And nothing matters.
v7 - Jordan Brankovich: Rethinking it all.
v7 - Kayden Brockman: Not done yet.
v7 - Ji-hyun Christensen: Just getting started.
- [+] Remind Me Tomorrow
- Destiny Martinez will live fast and die faster.
Aidan Winston is going to let you know you're not solving anything.
Lara Rodriguez thinks you should keep your opinion on her to yourself.
Peyton Hoffman isn't fond of the PC Police ruining everything.
Lindsey Sewall wants to make sure you drank water today you stupid bitch.
Luke Travers needs to have a code.
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- ↳ Mountain Ranch
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- ↳ Downtown
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- ↳ South 62nd Street
- ↳ Benson's Bar and Grill
- ↳ Performing Arts Center
- ↳ Sweet Bay Coffee
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- ↳ The Drive-In
- ↳ Major Taylor Skate Park
- ↳ The Rec Center
- ↳ The Seaside
- ↳ Residential Districts
- ↳ Briarwood Apartment Complex
- ↳ Kensington Heights
- ↳ Tilles Court
- ↳ Carrington Pointe
- ↳ The Distant Past
- The V1 Corner
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- ↳ Makeshift Hospital
- ↳ Helicopter Crash Site
- ↳ Small House
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- ↳ Hillside Cliff
- ↳ Dirt Path
- ↳ The Well
- ↳ The River
- ↳ Gazebo
- ↳ Waterfall
- ↳ Lookout Point
- ↳ Eastern Shore
- ↳ The Ravine
- ↳ School Building
- ↳ Old Warehouse
- ↳ Dark Caves
- ↳ The Lighthouse
- ↳ Bathroom Facility
- ↳ The Woods
- ↳ V1 AUs and Discussion