Que sera, sera
Que sera, sera
((Alba Reyes continued from Cast in the Name of God))
Alba rolled over in the bed and planted her feet on the ground. She hunched over, her eyes closed and a soft moan leaving her throat. The announcements had just finished, and she was already feeling quite crummy. Added to being on this island for a week with poor nutrition and regular anxiety, Alba was starting to feel a lot more emotionally and mentally drained. She stretched her neck to deal with the crick she had from sleeping, rubbing over the irritated spot with her hand. She let out a sigh.
She couldn't find Blair. Once again, she had run after someone, only for them to slip away from her. She even went back across the bridge, suspecting that Blair had gone that way. By the time she realized she wouldn't find Blair, the sun had set and she needed to find shelter. She went to the B dorms and locked herself in a bedroom. She had hoped that Enzo had helped Georgia, and that she'd be able to find them again tomorrow. There had to be something good to happen tomorrow.
The announcements told her otherwise. Georgia had died from her injury, and Blair was credited for it. Jeremy had also died, meaning that Blair wasn't able to help him with the people he was looking for. Worse, one of the people he was looking for had killed him. Now Alba knew Caedyn would be dangerous to stay around if she was killing her friends. Alba would have to remember that if she found Caedyn.
Bryony, Kimiko, Brendan, Jonathan, Candice, Blair, and Enzo were still alive, so Alba took note of that. Perhaps she'd be able to find someone on her list and things could get on track again. She had to explain her actions to someone and she needed to have someone tell her she wasn't terrible for what happened to Kaitlyn. More than half the abducted kids were dead at this point, so it would start to get harder to find anyone on the island, and most people left were killers, so she'd have to be careful around anyone she met.
"Well, I am a killer too, so people will probably be careful around me as well," Alba muttered to herself.
Alba stood up and stretched her back. There wasn't much time to waste. She had to be off. She could eat a protein bar while walking and call that brunch. Last night, Alba had transferred most of Kaitlyn's items into her bag, depriving the need for two bags. The uzi and min were tucked safely away, and Alba picked up the rifle. It had been weird, but the rifle was starting to become somewhat comforting in her hands. Maybe it's because she had more time with it and didn't get it by killing someone, but the rifle was starting to become part of her.
Alba slung her bag over her shoulder and kept the rifle in her hand. She opened the door to the dorm and stepped into the hall. She was on a mission today, and she was ready to complete it.
Alba rolled over in the bed and planted her feet on the ground. She hunched over, her eyes closed and a soft moan leaving her throat. The announcements had just finished, and she was already feeling quite crummy. Added to being on this island for a week with poor nutrition and regular anxiety, Alba was starting to feel a lot more emotionally and mentally drained. She stretched her neck to deal with the crick she had from sleeping, rubbing over the irritated spot with her hand. She let out a sigh.
She couldn't find Blair. Once again, she had run after someone, only for them to slip away from her. She even went back across the bridge, suspecting that Blair had gone that way. By the time she realized she wouldn't find Blair, the sun had set and she needed to find shelter. She went to the B dorms and locked herself in a bedroom. She had hoped that Enzo had helped Georgia, and that she'd be able to find them again tomorrow. There had to be something good to happen tomorrow.
The announcements told her otherwise. Georgia had died from her injury, and Blair was credited for it. Jeremy had also died, meaning that Blair wasn't able to help him with the people he was looking for. Worse, one of the people he was looking for had killed him. Now Alba knew Caedyn would be dangerous to stay around if she was killing her friends. Alba would have to remember that if she found Caedyn.
Bryony, Kimiko, Brendan, Jonathan, Candice, Blair, and Enzo were still alive, so Alba took note of that. Perhaps she'd be able to find someone on her list and things could get on track again. She had to explain her actions to someone and she needed to have someone tell her she wasn't terrible for what happened to Kaitlyn. More than half the abducted kids were dead at this point, so it would start to get harder to find anyone on the island, and most people left were killers, so she'd have to be careful around anyone she met.
"Well, I am a killer too, so people will probably be careful around me as well," Alba muttered to herself.
Alba stood up and stretched her back. There wasn't much time to waste. She had to be off. She could eat a protein bar while walking and call that brunch. Last night, Alba had transferred most of Kaitlyn's items into her bag, depriving the need for two bags. The uzi and min were tucked safely away, and Alba picked up the rifle. It had been weird, but the rifle was starting to become somewhat comforting in her hands. Maybe it's because she had more time with it and didn't get it by killing someone, but the rifle was starting to become part of her.
Alba slung her bag over her shoulder and kept the rifle in her hand. She opened the door to the dorm and stepped into the hall. She was on a mission today, and she was ready to complete it.
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((Brendan Harte continued from We Wish To Inform You That Tommorrow We Will Be Killed With Our Classmates))
It should have been me, not her.
That was all that he could think of as he made his way through the hallway of the B block building and he was trying to keep an eye out for any movement. The announcement had just ended and he was honestly still feeling so helpless and emotional. Why was he still alive? Jonathan shouldn't have left him alive. Amanda should still be living in his place, not him. Brendan didn't deserve to live and breathe. Why did Jonathan give him a second chance? Was it to teach him a lesson? To make him suffer more? It was working....
And that only made him want to lash out. Take his anger out on someone who deserved it. Like Jae. Just hearing the way that he killed that girl made Brendan mad. He knew that killing whoever she was, was utterly wrong. But to shoot her when her back was turned? That was just so.... cowardly. Wow, he was being a hypocrite. He basically killed Jerry from behind as well. Still....
Brendan stared down at the revolver that was in his hand. It felt so weird for him to actually be holding a gun. He used to be afraid of them. So why was he not scared of holding this one? Maybe he was accepting that there was no way out of this. No escape for anyone. Only one person can go home.
Only one person can go home....
Brendan slowly down his pace as he was getting close to a corner to turn and he stopped walking completely. He could hear someone's footsteps, his heartbeat was starting to race more quicker, his grip onto the revolver tightened. There was someone coming. Was it a friend? Or was it another killer?
He couldn't take any chances.
He raised the revolver towards the corner and he tried to keep it steady. He had to say something. Would he try and warn them off?
"Who's there?!" He yelled aloud. "I'm warning you, I will not be afraid to put a bullet through your skull!"
That sounded a lot harsher than he had hoped for.
It should have been me, not her.
That was all that he could think of as he made his way through the hallway of the B block building and he was trying to keep an eye out for any movement. The announcement had just ended and he was honestly still feeling so helpless and emotional. Why was he still alive? Jonathan shouldn't have left him alive. Amanda should still be living in his place, not him. Brendan didn't deserve to live and breathe. Why did Jonathan give him a second chance? Was it to teach him a lesson? To make him suffer more? It was working....
And that only made him want to lash out. Take his anger out on someone who deserved it. Like Jae. Just hearing the way that he killed that girl made Brendan mad. He knew that killing whoever she was, was utterly wrong. But to shoot her when her back was turned? That was just so.... cowardly. Wow, he was being a hypocrite. He basically killed Jerry from behind as well. Still....
Brendan stared down at the revolver that was in his hand. It felt so weird for him to actually be holding a gun. He used to be afraid of them. So why was he not scared of holding this one? Maybe he was accepting that there was no way out of this. No escape for anyone. Only one person can go home.
Only one person can go home....
Brendan slowly down his pace as he was getting close to a corner to turn and he stopped walking completely. He could hear someone's footsteps, his heartbeat was starting to race more quicker, his grip onto the revolver tightened. There was someone coming. Was it a friend? Or was it another killer?
He couldn't take any chances.
He raised the revolver towards the corner and he tried to keep it steady. He had to say something. Would he try and warn them off?
"Who's there?!" He yelled aloud. "I'm warning you, I will not be afraid to put a bullet through your skull!"
That sounded a lot harsher than he had hoped for.
Alba froze when she heard a voice calling out to her. Someone was already threatening her. She couldn't believe that someone had already found her and was already on edge. But after a few seconds, Alba realized she recognized the voice. She was momentarily stunned, but then lowered the rifle.
"Brendan...it's me..." she said.
She remained in place. She had found her friend again after two horrible days, but she couldn't bring herself to move. She didn't know what to do now.
"Brendan...it's me..." she said.
She remained in place. She had found her friend again after two horrible days, but she couldn't bring herself to move. She didn't know what to do now.
- Primrosette
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Brendan recognized the voice and he regretted speaking in such a threatening tone of voice. Just hearing Alba's voice was just a huge relief to him. He had wanted to see her again. And now he was given that chance to do so. He couldn't mess things up more now.
"Alba...?"
Brendan rushed around the corner to just see her. There she was. He felt himself smile a little out of habit. He then saw that he still had the revolver raised and he quickly lowered it by his side. Then he cleared his throat awkwardly.
"I-I'm sorry for saying that, Alba. I'm glad to see that you are alright. You're not hurt at all, are you?" He asked worriedly, stepping closer to her slowly. "I was afraid that you were someone who would try to kill me.... Again, I'm so sorry about my attitude, Alba."
"Alba...?"
Brendan rushed around the corner to just see her. There she was. He felt himself smile a little out of habit. He then saw that he still had the revolver raised and he quickly lowered it by his side. Then he cleared his throat awkwardly.
"I-I'm sorry for saying that, Alba. I'm glad to see that you are alright. You're not hurt at all, are you?" He asked worriedly, stepping closer to her slowly. "I was afraid that you were someone who would try to kill me.... Again, I'm so sorry about my attitude, Alba."
Alba remained in place as Brendan made his way around the corner. He lowered his gun and then began to apologize for shouting at her. Alba stared at Brendan, her mouth slightly open. It looked like Brendan was alone. He and Fiyori must have gotten separated at some point in the last few days.
She continued to look over him. Judging by how he spoke, the last few days must have also been terrible for him, especially if he was threatening the sounds of footsteps. Alba swallowed a lump in her throat. She wanted to talk, but wasn't sure what to say.
Everything came flooding back to her. Kaitlyn pulling a weapon on her, forcing her into the cave, her smile as the water began to flood in, and the zombie-like movements as she pursued Alba after being shot. Then came the image of Georgia being shot by Blair. All that blood. Alba needed to Brendan about this. She needed to tell him the truth about these events and what she went through. She had to explain why Kaitlyn died, and why she became a killer.
But she couldn't say that. Alba stared at Brendan, her breathing starting to pick up. Finally, she squinted her eyes as they began to fill with tear. Alba let out a cry and began to sob, remaining frozen in place as tears began to fall down her cheeks. She turned her head down and let the tears start to fall onto the ground at her feet. This isn't how she wanted to present herself to Brendan when she finally found him, but she couldn't help it.
She continued to look over him. Judging by how he spoke, the last few days must have also been terrible for him, especially if he was threatening the sounds of footsteps. Alba swallowed a lump in her throat. She wanted to talk, but wasn't sure what to say.
Everything came flooding back to her. Kaitlyn pulling a weapon on her, forcing her into the cave, her smile as the water began to flood in, and the zombie-like movements as she pursued Alba after being shot. Then came the image of Georgia being shot by Blair. All that blood. Alba needed to Brendan about this. She needed to tell him the truth about these events and what she went through. She had to explain why Kaitlyn died, and why she became a killer.
But she couldn't say that. Alba stared at Brendan, her breathing starting to pick up. Finally, she squinted her eyes as they began to fill with tear. Alba let out a cry and began to sob, remaining frozen in place as tears began to fall down her cheeks. She turned her head down and let the tears start to fall onto the ground at her feet. This isn't how she wanted to present herself to Brendan when she finally found him, but she couldn't help it.
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Alba was starting to cry in front of him and it honestly caught him by surprise. Maybe it was because Brendan was normally the emotional one and he just never thought that Alba would break down like that. He would be crying along with her right then. But he didn't have the energy to do so. He had used up all his tears when he had been near Amanda's body. Everything was just getting worse and worse. Why has he even threatened Alba like that? He never thought that he would have it in him to say something so cruel and cold.
Alba was still sobbing in front of him and he was just standing there like a bumbling idiot. He had to do something for her. Alba had always been there for him when he needed her. And he wanted to be there for her. He took some steps forward towards her and he stared down at her, trying to think of something positive to say.
Brendan wrapped one of his arms around her, the one without the gun in his hand, and he pulled her into a hug against him. It felt so great to actually be holding her like this. "Hey, hey. Everything is going to be okay, Alba. I should have found you sooner before whatever happened with Kaitlyn...." He paused for a few moments and he rubbed her back gently to try to calm her down. "I'm sure that you have a reason for what happened between you two. I'm sorry for not staying with you, Alba. I thought that you were still with me and Fiyori...."
Alba was still sobbing in front of him and he was just standing there like a bumbling idiot. He had to do something for her. Alba had always been there for him when he needed her. And he wanted to be there for her. He took some steps forward towards her and he stared down at her, trying to think of something positive to say.
Brendan wrapped one of his arms around her, the one without the gun in his hand, and he pulled her into a hug against him. It felt so great to actually be holding her like this. "Hey, hey. Everything is going to be okay, Alba. I should have found you sooner before whatever happened with Kaitlyn...." He paused for a few moments and he rubbed her back gently to try to calm her down. "I'm sure that you have a reason for what happened between you two. I'm sorry for not staying with you, Alba. I thought that you were still with me and Fiyori...."
Alba clutched Brendan when he came up to hug her. It felt good to get a hug after everything that had happened here. She couldn't remember the last time she had one; maybe it was when she hugged her mom goodbye the day she left for the science trip. Whenever it was, it felt good to get some pleasant physical contact after a week of torture. Plus, Brendan was doing what she hoped he would do if they found each other.
Brendan said he was sure she had a reason for killing Kaitlyn. Alba pressed her head against his chest.
"I'll tell you," she said. "I'll tell you everything."
Alba looked up and into Brendan's eyes.
"Brendan, please let me tell you exactly what happened. Preferably not here in the open."
Brendan said he was sure she had a reason for killing Kaitlyn. Alba pressed her head against his chest.
"I'll tell you," she said. "I'll tell you everything."
Alba looked up and into Brendan's eyes.
"Brendan, please let me tell you exactly what happened. Preferably not here in the open."
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Brendan stared back into her eyes and he nodded his head slightly. She wanted to tell him what happened and he was willingly to listen to her. He wanted to be a good friend to Alba. He had to at least do something right for a change. He also was curious to know what happened between Alba and Kaitlyn. He was thinking that it must have been a terrible experience for Alba to have done through.
Brendan still had his arm around her and he didn't move it away. He wanted to hold her for a little bit longer. "Sure, sure. Uh.... I agree. I think it would be better if we can stay in one of the rooms here." He commented as he looked around and he felt a little paranoid, hoping that no one would turn up. "I suggest that we should barricade the door as well. If we can find anything to block it with."
Just make sure not to break down in front of her, Brendan.
Brendan still had his arm around her and he didn't move it away. He wanted to hold her for a little bit longer. "Sure, sure. Uh.... I agree. I think it would be better if we can stay in one of the rooms here." He commented as he looked around and he felt a little paranoid, hoping that no one would turn up. "I suggest that we should barricade the door as well. If we can find anything to block it with."
Just make sure not to break down in front of her, Brendan.
"Okay, let's go," Alba said.
A few minutes later, Alba and Brendan were in one of the dorm rooms. They had moved a desk under the door knob, blocking anyone from coming in. Alba sat on the old bed, her hands cupped together in her lap. She kept her gaze down to her lap as well. She found it hard to look Brendan in the eyes right now. She was confessing to a murder she committed, but she found it quite hard to look her friend in the eyes and explain it. She resolved to speak loudly, clearly, and honestly about what had happened.
"Alright. Here's what happened..." she began.
Alba breathed in, then out.
"I found Kait by the cove. I was so happy to find a roller derby teammate here. Sure, she had killed someone, but Kaitlyn deserved some fair treatment. Innocent until proven guilty, y'know. Well, at least as it applies here. And everything started fine. We were just chatting, catching up on what happened, and it all made sense to me. I thought Kaitlyn would be cool and could help me find you guys.
"But then she turned. She pulled a crossbow on me and forced me to play a game with her. She gave me a gun and took me into the cove. She wanted to play a game; one she called 'High Tide'. It was like Chicken, but with sea water. We had to sit in a cave pointing weapons at one another and if one of us tried to flee, we had to shoot that person.
"It was so horrifying; standing in a dark cave as cold water flooded in. But Kaitlyn was excited. She was smiling the whole time and enjoying it. It was like she was in some other world. She was happy that she was about to drown, and she didn't care how foolish the whole thing was. She was living in the moment, and nothing else mattered.
"Finally, the water was getting too high, and suddenly, while Kaitlyn was making a really bad joke, she got really mad and shot at me. She missed, but I flinched. I hit the trigger and shot her. I shot her several times with the gun. And if you could believe it, she was still smiling. She was coming at me smiling and congratulating me. I swam out of the cove, but she didn't come out. I shot and killed my friend.
"I know I didn't mean to kill her, and I know I wouldn't have done it if I wasn't put in that situation by her, but I still feel guilty about it. I've chatted with a few others about it since then, but I still can't stop thinking about it. God, everything's going wrong. I killed Kaitlyn, then Jeremy died sometime after I met him, and then Blair shot Georgia for no reason. Everything fell apart so quickly."
Alba looked up at Brendan. Tears were falling down her cheeks.
"Brendan...I don't want to believe I'm a bad person, but why do I feel like one?"
A few minutes later, Alba and Brendan were in one of the dorm rooms. They had moved a desk under the door knob, blocking anyone from coming in. Alba sat on the old bed, her hands cupped together in her lap. She kept her gaze down to her lap as well. She found it hard to look Brendan in the eyes right now. She was confessing to a murder she committed, but she found it quite hard to look her friend in the eyes and explain it. She resolved to speak loudly, clearly, and honestly about what had happened.
"Alright. Here's what happened..." she began.
Alba breathed in, then out.
"I found Kait by the cove. I was so happy to find a roller derby teammate here. Sure, she had killed someone, but Kaitlyn deserved some fair treatment. Innocent until proven guilty, y'know. Well, at least as it applies here. And everything started fine. We were just chatting, catching up on what happened, and it all made sense to me. I thought Kaitlyn would be cool and could help me find you guys.
"But then she turned. She pulled a crossbow on me and forced me to play a game with her. She gave me a gun and took me into the cove. She wanted to play a game; one she called 'High Tide'. It was like Chicken, but with sea water. We had to sit in a cave pointing weapons at one another and if one of us tried to flee, we had to shoot that person.
"It was so horrifying; standing in a dark cave as cold water flooded in. But Kaitlyn was excited. She was smiling the whole time and enjoying it. It was like she was in some other world. She was happy that she was about to drown, and she didn't care how foolish the whole thing was. She was living in the moment, and nothing else mattered.
"Finally, the water was getting too high, and suddenly, while Kaitlyn was making a really bad joke, she got really mad and shot at me. She missed, but I flinched. I hit the trigger and shot her. I shot her several times with the gun. And if you could believe it, she was still smiling. She was coming at me smiling and congratulating me. I swam out of the cove, but she didn't come out. I shot and killed my friend.
"I know I didn't mean to kill her, and I know I wouldn't have done it if I wasn't put in that situation by her, but I still feel guilty about it. I've chatted with a few others about it since then, but I still can't stop thinking about it. God, everything's going wrong. I killed Kaitlyn, then Jeremy died sometime after I met him, and then Blair shot Georgia for no reason. Everything fell apart so quickly."
Alba looked up at Brendan. Tears were falling down her cheeks.
"Brendan...I don't want to believe I'm a bad person, but why do I feel like one?"
- Primrosette
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Brendan took in everything that Alba was telling him in silence. And it was a lot to take in. What Alba had gone through was a lot worse than what he been through. At least he believed she did. Kaitlyn had forced her into making a choice. She forced Alba to shoot her in a very dire situation. Like she wanted Alba to end it for her and to force her to face this brute reality. How was he should to feel about that? It was breaking his heart that Alba was feeling like she was a bad person for what she did. She wasn't. Brendan didn't believe that she was a terrible human being. What could he even say to her to make her believe that she wasn't that?
Brendan stepped closer to where Alba was sitting and he knelt down in front of her, not caring about the filthy floor. He then looked her in her eyes and he was trying to not feel so down for her. He wanted to make things better for her. But he had to try to think of how he would word things to her. How could he change her opinion about herself?
"Alba, you are not a bad person. I.... I know that Kaitlyn was your friend but she forced you into shooting her. She did shoot at you first so what you did was in self-defence. I'm sorry if that sounds pretty harsh from me of all people to say." Brendan said to her, feeling like he was just making things worse. "I think that this situation got to Kaitlyn by the sounds of it. Maybe she wanted you to end it for her in her little twisted way, Alba. Maybe she wanted you to understand that everything that's happening to us is some sick fantasy for a bunch of depraved low-lifes who have nothing better to do than watching teenagers kill each other. I don't know."
Brendan let out a small, tired sigh.
"You're a better person than me, Alba. I stabbed Jerry to save Nancy Kyle. Fucking Nancy Kyle. And I hate myself more for it. I killed Bernadette because I couldn't handle her wanting me to go away. I didn't want to get abandoned by my best friend and for that, I took it out on her and she ended up dying because I was that selfish of a person. And I didn't even realize it until Jon woke me up to the truth!" Brendan's voice had gotten louder with anger boiling through him and he glared down at the ground in front of him, shaking a little. "I'm the bad one, not you, Alba. Sorry for yelling like that. I'm just so tired of it all."
Brendan stepped closer to where Alba was sitting and he knelt down in front of her, not caring about the filthy floor. He then looked her in her eyes and he was trying to not feel so down for her. He wanted to make things better for her. But he had to try to think of how he would word things to her. How could he change her opinion about herself?
"Alba, you are not a bad person. I.... I know that Kaitlyn was your friend but she forced you into shooting her. She did shoot at you first so what you did was in self-defence. I'm sorry if that sounds pretty harsh from me of all people to say." Brendan said to her, feeling like he was just making things worse. "I think that this situation got to Kaitlyn by the sounds of it. Maybe she wanted you to end it for her in her little twisted way, Alba. Maybe she wanted you to understand that everything that's happening to us is some sick fantasy for a bunch of depraved low-lifes who have nothing better to do than watching teenagers kill each other. I don't know."
Brendan let out a small, tired sigh.
"You're a better person than me, Alba. I stabbed Jerry to save Nancy Kyle. Fucking Nancy Kyle. And I hate myself more for it. I killed Bernadette because I couldn't handle her wanting me to go away. I didn't want to get abandoned by my best friend and for that, I took it out on her and she ended up dying because I was that selfish of a person. And I didn't even realize it until Jon woke me up to the truth!" Brendan's voice had gotten louder with anger boiling through him and he glared down at the ground in front of him, shaking a little. "I'm the bad one, not you, Alba. Sorry for yelling like that. I'm just so tired of it all."
Alba stared at Brendan as he knelt before her and spoke. Brendan gave his interpretation of Kaitlyn's game, one that Alba was almost surprised that she hadn't considered yet. Maybe Kaitlyn was trying to commit suicide and constructed the whole thing to ensure she'd die and that Alba could be better off. Alba did gain an extra gun and a land mine, plus extra food and water. She had her one kill, so if she somehow was the last person standing, she could actually go home. Alba felt seized by this idea. Her friend wanted to die, and Alba was so terrified that she wasn't able to see it.
Brendan then revealed something worse. The girl he killed Jeremiah for wasn't Raina, but Nancy Kyle. Brendan saved a murderer, and he probably felt responsible for everyone she killed after that. From the sounds of his rant after, he still wasn't convinced he was a good person. Maybe there was some way to accurately evaluate their killings, but Alba didn't think it mattered right now. Intention or not, they were in the same place right now.
"Bren..." Alba said, "You're not a bad person. If I'm not a bad person, you're not either. I really don't think there's much separating us at this point."
Alba leaned forward, keeping her gaze down. She rested her right arm on her leg and placed her fist against her forehead.
"I'm tired of it all too. At this point, I don't think there's much dancing around it: we're all doing exactly what those terrorists wanted. We tried to be better, but we aren't. I don't think anyone could last more than a week here if they weren't willing to do bad things."
Alba rubbed her forehead against her fist, moving her head between her knuckles slowly.
"At the least, while we're still here, I want to act in a way that will let me actually go home if I'm the only one left."
Brendan then revealed something worse. The girl he killed Jeremiah for wasn't Raina, but Nancy Kyle. Brendan saved a murderer, and he probably felt responsible for everyone she killed after that. From the sounds of his rant after, he still wasn't convinced he was a good person. Maybe there was some way to accurately evaluate their killings, but Alba didn't think it mattered right now. Intention or not, they were in the same place right now.
"Bren..." Alba said, "You're not a bad person. If I'm not a bad person, you're not either. I really don't think there's much separating us at this point."
Alba leaned forward, keeping her gaze down. She rested her right arm on her leg and placed her fist against her forehead.
"I'm tired of it all too. At this point, I don't think there's much dancing around it: we're all doing exactly what those terrorists wanted. We tried to be better, but we aren't. I don't think anyone could last more than a week here if they weren't willing to do bad things."
Alba rubbed her forehead against her fist, moving her head between her knuckles slowly.
"At the least, while we're still here, I want to act in a way that will let me actually go home if I'm the only one left."
- Primrosette
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Brendan was silent as Alba was saying her piece to him and he couldn't help but continue to stare at the ground. She was right about one thing. They were both in the same boat. To be honest, everyone else that was still alive were in the same boat. However, the one person he thought that was worthy of going home was sitting right in front of him and he didn't want to tell her that. He still had things that he needed to do and people to see. He had to confront some people who wouldn't be happy to see him. Ty, Jon, possibly Dorothy. He needed to find his allies as well. Maxim, Fiyori, Candice. Were they all safe? He wondered if he would ever see them again. He had to hope that he would. He had to be positive about it.
You need to find Jae, Brendan. You have to make him pay. You can't let him go home.
Brendan looked up and he was trying to glance into Alba's eyes. He had to tell her what he wanted to do. She might not agree with what he wants to do. But it was his choice. His selfish choice that he had been thinking about for a while. He opened his mouth to speak and then he closed it abruptly.
Just tell her, Brendan!
"I..... I want to kill Jae."
You need to find Jae, Brendan. You have to make him pay. You can't let him go home.
Brendan looked up and he was trying to glance into Alba's eyes. He had to tell her what he wanted to do. She might not agree with what he wants to do. But it was his choice. His selfish choice that he had been thinking about for a while. He opened his mouth to speak and then he closed it abruptly.
Just tell her, Brendan!
"I..... I want to kill Jae."
Alba froze. She turned her head up and met with Brendan's eyes. His last statement hung in the air, and her mouth fell slightly agape.
"...why?"
Jae did shoot him. She knew that well enough. But this was the first time Brendan wanted to actually take someone's life, and she needed to know his reasons for it.
"...why?"
Jae did shoot him. She knew that well enough. But this was the first time Brendan wanted to actually take someone's life, and she needed to know his reasons for it.
- Primrosette
- Posts: 1184
- Joined: Tue Aug 14, 2018 9:58 am
- Location: In the Dark Abyss
Brendan didn't even think that it was because of Jae shooting him. No, it definitely wasn't because of that. He could think of better reasons why he had to stop Jae. He had this growing hatred forming towards Jae because he made him think of himself. A weak coward. It disgusted Brendan to the point that he wanted to see Jae not breathing anymore. But....
"I don't think that he should go home. I think he is too dangerous and a threat to many other people who are innocent here. I honestly can't forgive him for what he did. I've started to have this burning hatred building inside me towards him. Jae makes me think of myself in a bad way. I'm a coward who couldn't do anything right. So I should do the right thing by taking players out, right? It's the decision that I came to. I hope that you can understand that, Alba. And it's not just him I need to take out...." Brendan paused for a few moments and he averted his eyes towards a wall. "I don't really want to say this but...."
Brendan bit down on his lip hard, tasting a bit of blood in his mouth. He was going to regret saying this to her. But he had no choice.
"I have to stop Jon too. I saw him kill.... kill Amanda right in front of me. She was trying to help me because Jon was shooting at me with this gun." Brendan held up the revolver in his hand for Alba to see and then he lowered it again. "Jon said those bullets were supposed to be for me, not her. I wanted him to kill me after Amanda died, but he let me live. And now if I see him again, I will end it. I have to do the right thing. Jon isn't.... Jon isn't himself anymore. Neither is Dorothy. All the people I care about are now.... not who they used to be."
"I don't think that he should go home. I think he is too dangerous and a threat to many other people who are innocent here. I honestly can't forgive him for what he did. I've started to have this burning hatred building inside me towards him. Jae makes me think of myself in a bad way. I'm a coward who couldn't do anything right. So I should do the right thing by taking players out, right? It's the decision that I came to. I hope that you can understand that, Alba. And it's not just him I need to take out...." Brendan paused for a few moments and he averted his eyes towards a wall. "I don't really want to say this but...."
Brendan bit down on his lip hard, tasting a bit of blood in his mouth. He was going to regret saying this to her. But he had no choice.
"I have to stop Jon too. I saw him kill.... kill Amanda right in front of me. She was trying to help me because Jon was shooting at me with this gun." Brendan held up the revolver in his hand for Alba to see and then he lowered it again. "Jon said those bullets were supposed to be for me, not her. I wanted him to kill me after Amanda died, but he let me live. And now if I see him again, I will end it. I have to do the right thing. Jon isn't.... Jon isn't himself anymore. Neither is Dorothy. All the people I care about are now.... not who they used to be."
Alba looked at Brendan as he explained his reasons for wanting to kill Jae. She could see he was tying a lot of his worries and insecurities to Jae, which Alba wasn't sure was entirely healthy. She knew Jae was dangerous and posed a threat to a lot of people here, but she wasn't sure if hunting him down was the right thing to do. Not only that, but Jon had apparently killed Amanda and nearly killed Brendan as well. If Jon really was going to be that way, she figured it wouldn't be good to find him anymore. She wasn't entirely sure about Dorothy, but she trusted Brendan if he said she wasn't right to be around.
Alba closed her eyes and sighed. It hurt that her closest friend on the island had reached such a point that he wanted to go out and kill people. Still, she needed to understand fully before they moved on.
"So, if that's how you feel," she began, "is that what you plan to do now? Wander the island hoping you find Jae and Jon so you can kill them?"
Alba stared at Brendan.
"And if you kill them, then what?"
Alba closed her eyes and sighed. It hurt that her closest friend on the island had reached such a point that he wanted to go out and kill people. Still, she needed to understand fully before they moved on.
"So, if that's how you feel," she began, "is that what you plan to do now? Wander the island hoping you find Jae and Jon so you can kill them?"
Alba stared at Brendan.
"And if you kill them, then what?"