((Garnet continued from More Than Truth))
Garnet tasted acid for a long while after her mad sprint to safety, the burning in the bottom of her lungs causing her to double over wheezing several times as she made her way past the large house and then continued on, heading further out onto the trail and at length, towards the ocean. She'd got a little taste of nature earlier, and she had vague hopes that she could perhaps cool her nerves by immersing herself into it once again. Her pounding heart wasn't just a matter of exhaustion. She didn't know how close a call that had been. Close.
A lot of the feelings were sensations and the sensations, feelings, just now.
For now, she tried to focus on the fact that she wasn't dead, and the plants, with a little side order of animal spotting. She'd seen some birds and like what was maybe a monkey? They did have monkeys here. Mild positive.
She wasn't intentionally—okay that was a lie, she was avoiding the buildings, still. There was the larger house up there, she'd gone past some other houses after that and now ducked that place which must have been the temple. If Garnet went to any of them, her chances of running into somebody drastically increased, and she didn't really know if she could do people right now. Or like, maybe as accurate was that she didn't know what to expect from any people she might encounter. There were so few of them left now, and anybody still alive had their own scars, and/or was a multiple murderer. Another gunfight was not something she wanted to add to her dance card. Garnet's indignant fury had guttered out yesterday, and what replaced it...
Well. She still didn't know. She didn't need to find out right away.
For now, she had a pretty cliff path. It wasn't enough, but it counted for something.
To Survive
Success was hard to articulate—and failure was very, very easy. The reasons were simple: nobody was perfect, everybody failed. That made failure relatable, that made failure understandable. How many people in life honestly succeeded at anything? Success was alien and foreign. A ghost in the night that haunted dreams and coaxed the unknowing forward. People spend their whole life yearning for success—but what would they do if they got it? How many people were like dogs chasing cars? Willing to die on the chance of completing the impossible chase.
It was easy to do anything in victory, it was only in defeat that you find yourself. That had been the only truth Ace had known. But if victory was supposed to be easy, what did victory cost? If it was a price Ace was willing to pay—how’d he know whether or not he was getting ripped off? His bag on one shoulder, the strap of the LMG on the other (much worse) one. The big hulking weapon was in both hands weighing about as much as a big ol’ bag of dogfood. A 200 round drum was attached and ready to be unloaded into anything that moved.
Shoot first, ask questions never.
That wasn’t personal. That wasn’t a reflection on Ace. That was just the game. That was just the answer Ace had found in defeat. The lesson learned from loss.
Ace didn’t want to return to the inner circle and that meant his options were limited. Beats hadn’t been near the Cliff Side all game. That had nothing to do by design—that had everything to do with Ace being barely literate when it came to reading a map. The threat of the cliffs scared Beats and brought him back to anxious senses. His meal and the beer that accompanied it made him move sluggish and slow. There was a cramp in his stomach.
Part of Beats blamed it on the chicken fried steak.
Another part of it blamed it on Garnet Barnes. A basketball player on the girls team—but not an impressive one. Just being on a sports team was enough for you to be recognizable to Beats.Everything went back to athletics with Ace and he recognized sports people on the virtue of being sports people. Even the unimpressive. That wasn’t Garnet's fault, the girls team was pretty impressive in general. They were also pretty dead…Garnet was probably more impressive than she let on. Or at least than her athletic ability did.
“If you gotta weapon, you best be droppin’ that shit—I don’t want no problems…”
Ace had gotten the jump on the basketball player but he hadn’t pulled the trigger. Beats had been so judgmental of Faith for the same sin. Her own words echoed in his mind as he repeated their meaning at Garnet. Faith—the vice president. Faith was a friend—Faith was everybody’s friend. Ace had shot Faith in the chest. Faith wasn’t dead. Yet. That was the key word. Neither was Garnet. Yet. A skeleton key that created skeletons, who would've thought?
“But I don’t mind solvin’ ‘em either.”
It was easy to do anything in victory, it was only in defeat that you find yourself. That had been the only truth Ace had known. But if victory was supposed to be easy, what did victory cost? If it was a price Ace was willing to pay—how’d he know whether or not he was getting ripped off? His bag on one shoulder, the strap of the LMG on the other (much worse) one. The big hulking weapon was in both hands weighing about as much as a big ol’ bag of dogfood. A 200 round drum was attached and ready to be unloaded into anything that moved.
Shoot first, ask questions never.
He was cracked but he wasn’t cracked up. Ace had studied, sure, but this was a test that was much, much bigger than him. Beats knew that. Ace had to be the biggest and baddest person on this island to come out the other side—he wasn’t. He’d have to lie to himself and to everybody else. If it was a lie…he’d die on that lie. Kill for it.Saku wrote:Just a little bit longer, so don't crack up on me yet. It's finals, but you've studied, and you'll pass.
That wasn’t personal. That wasn’t a reflection on Ace. That was just the game. That was just the answer Ace had found in defeat. The lesson learned from loss.
[ Ace Beats Continued From: The Gift My Father Gave Me pt.3 ]
Ace didn’t want to return to the inner circle and that meant his options were limited. Beats hadn’t been near the Cliff Side all game. That had nothing to do by design—that had everything to do with Ace being barely literate when it came to reading a map. The threat of the cliffs scared Beats and brought him back to anxious senses. His meal and the beer that accompanied it made him move sluggish and slow. There was a cramp in his stomach.
Part of Beats blamed it on the chicken fried steak.
Another part of it blamed it on Garnet Barnes. A basketball player on the girls team—but not an impressive one. Just being on a sports team was enough for you to be recognizable to Beats.Everything went back to athletics with Ace and he recognized sports people on the virtue of being sports people. Even the unimpressive. That wasn’t Garnet's fault, the girls team was pretty impressive in general. They were also pretty dead…Garnet was probably more impressive than she let on. Or at least than her athletic ability did.
“If you gotta weapon, you best be droppin’ that shit—I don’t want no problems…”
Ace had gotten the jump on the basketball player but he hadn’t pulled the trigger. Beats had been so judgmental of Faith for the same sin. Her own words echoed in his mind as he repeated their meaning at Garnet. Faith—the vice president. Faith was a friend—Faith was everybody’s friend. Ace had shot Faith in the chest. Faith wasn’t dead. Yet. That was the key word. Neither was Garnet. Yet. A skeleton key that created skeletons, who would've thought?
“But I don’t mind solvin’ ‘em either.”
She stopped and she sat, perched on a rock not too far away from where the path stopped being a path and the island stopped being island. It was an okay spot. Okay was maybe as good as anything could be expected to be anymore. Garnet let herself breathe and tried to imagine a little less tension than before.
Unfortunately, the tension brought itself.
She froze for a moment. She'd let her guard down. That could be it all over. But--no, they'd decided to talk.
Garnet took a couple of seconds to assemble the voice. A depressing reality that even without the slightest bit of deduction, a random guess would have had a decent chance. There really weren't that many left who it could be. She didn't need to guess. She knew who it was.
"It's in my bag, Ace. You can see the handle."
Stock, not handle. Whatever. She shoved it in there to run like hell and hadn't taken it back out again.
Maybe she should ask him to stay calm as she turned around, but Garnet felt vaguely affronted at the idea of having to ask. She knew Ace a little, not well. Kind of person she'd probably give a little smile and a nod if they saw each other at the bus stop but wouldn't go over and strike up a conversation.
That was then.
"You don't have to act all cool."
Unfortunately, the tension brought itself.
She froze for a moment. She'd let her guard down. That could be it all over. But--no, they'd decided to talk.
Garnet took a couple of seconds to assemble the voice. A depressing reality that even without the slightest bit of deduction, a random guess would have had a decent chance. There really weren't that many left who it could be. She didn't need to guess. She knew who it was.
"It's in my bag, Ace. You can see the handle."
Stock, not handle. Whatever. She shoved it in there to run like hell and hadn't taken it back out again.
Maybe she should ask him to stay calm as she turned around, but Garnet felt vaguely affronted at the idea of having to ask. She knew Ace a little, not well. Kind of person she'd probably give a little smile and a nod if they saw each other at the bus stop but wouldn't go over and strike up a conversation.
That was then.
"You don't have to act all cool."
“Ain’t tryna be cool…,”
He really wasn’t.
“I’m tryna get home.”
The LMG felt awkward and cumbersome in his hands. It weighed on him—not so much the gun but the idea of using it. Beats thought of the seven murders he may have played accessory in. He thought of Connor who he stared down before gunning him down. Ace thought of the two girls—one in the window and Faith who had walked up on him. Beats thought about beating Justin down. Garnet wasn’t different from any of them. Ace didn’t know her any better than he did Lori, he for sure didn't know her as well as he did Connor.
It wouldn’t be easy to pull the trigger—it didn’t have to be. It didn’t matter if it was hard to do—so long as it got done.
“You gonna make this easy…?”
He really wasn’t.
“I’m tryna get home.”
The LMG felt awkward and cumbersome in his hands. It weighed on him—not so much the gun but the idea of using it. Beats thought of the seven murders he may have played accessory in. He thought of Connor who he stared down before gunning him down. Ace thought of the two girls—one in the window and Faith who had walked up on him. Beats thought about beating Justin down. Garnet wasn’t different from any of them. Ace didn’t know her any better than he did Lori, he for sure didn't know her as well as he did Connor.
It wouldn’t be easy to pull the trigger—it didn’t have to be. It didn’t matter if it was hard to do—so long as it got done.
“You gonna make this easy…?”
Garnet tipped her head back, closing her eyes for a second. She twisted around halfway.
Fuck. That was a big gun.
Her chest tightened. This wasn't the Ace from back home. This Ace was just a couple of steps further back down the path than Erika, and Erika a couple of steps back was still the kind of person to relentlessly murder anybody that got in her way that wasn't Garnet.
She considered that she was about to die.
"We all want to go home, dude.
"You know, I wasn't sure how I felt about you killing Justin. Wasn't sure if I should thank someone for killing someone else. You did what I couldn't.
"But you're standing back there with a gun on me, so...
"Guess maybe I shouldn't, if it was just one Justin killing another Justin.
"That the kind of guy you are?"
Fuck. That was a big gun.
Her chest tightened. This wasn't the Ace from back home. This Ace was just a couple of steps further back down the path than Erika, and Erika a couple of steps back was still the kind of person to relentlessly murder anybody that got in her way that wasn't Garnet.
She considered that she was about to die.
"We all want to go home, dude.
"You know, I wasn't sure how I felt about you killing Justin. Wasn't sure if I should thank someone for killing someone else. You did what I couldn't.
"But you're standing back there with a gun on me, so...
"Guess maybe I shouldn't, if it was just one Justin killing another Justin.
"That the kind of guy you are?"
“I dunno…”
The gun was being held tightly, it was being pointed at Garnet—but Beats was not taking aim. Not yet. He didn’t know as to why…
“Maybe…?”
Was Ace like Justin? Cowering and weak and crying and unrecognizable Justin? Ace had murdered in self defense, he had murdered in self preservation and he had murdered in the name of selfish satisfaction. Ace only felt ashamed that he wasn’t ashamed. Did Ace feel guilty over Connor? Over Faith? Over Myles, Lori and Parker? Sure. Was guilt enough to stop him from doing anything ever? Ask Meilin.
“That’s prolly exactly the type of guy I am.”
Beats swallowed and took a breath. Was she going to make this easy…? Could it ever be?
“What’s your plan, huh?”
Beats wasn’t flippant in his question—he was defiant. If Garnet had a better solution than he did—Ace would take it. But Connor hadn’t presented a better option. Or Darlene. Or Saku. The only choice was that there was no choice. The answer to this test had been given on day one. It wasn't Ace's fault that a lot of his classmates still didn't get the memo nearly two weeks in.
“How you plannin’ on gettin’ outta here? I’m all ears, believe fuckin’ me.”
The gun was being held tightly, it was being pointed at Garnet—but Beats was not taking aim. Not yet. He didn’t know as to why…
“Maybe…?”
Was Ace like Justin? Cowering and weak and crying and unrecognizable Justin? Ace had murdered in self defense, he had murdered in self preservation and he had murdered in the name of selfish satisfaction. Ace only felt ashamed that he wasn’t ashamed. Did Ace feel guilty over Connor? Over Faith? Over Myles, Lori and Parker? Sure. Was guilt enough to stop him from doing anything ever? Ask Meilin.
“That’s prolly exactly the type of guy I am.”
Beats swallowed and took a breath. Was she going to make this easy…? Could it ever be?
“What’s your plan, huh?”
Beats wasn’t flippant in his question—he was defiant. If Garnet had a better solution than he did—Ace would take it. But Connor hadn’t presented a better option. Or Darlene. Or Saku. The only choice was that there was no choice. The answer to this test had been given on day one. It wasn't Ace's fault that a lot of his classmates still didn't get the memo nearly two weeks in.
“How you plannin’ on gettin’ outta here? I’m all ears, believe fuckin’ me.”
"I don't have any fucking plan!"
“Alright,” he barked back, “Well I do!”
And he wasn’t gonna be vilified for it! Ace didn’t want to do this shit—Ace had to do it. Beats couldn’t afford to walk around aimlessly…that had cost too many lives! Ace needed to be focused. Ace needed to be driven. Ace needed to get home. Ace needed to win. Garnet didn't have a plan? Ace understood that. This place was scary and the reality of what it took to get out even scarier.
“So this is how it’s gonna go down yo,” Beats steeled his gaze, “You gonna leave your bag and your weapon—right fuckin’ there,” Beats pointed to the spot on the ground, “Then you gonna walk the fuck away and not look back and Imma count to ten.”
Green eyes met green eyes and Ace tried his best to not get burned by the fire in his belly. Beats tried his best to listen only to the rhythm of his heart and not the quivering of his mind.
“I wouldn’t do nuthin’ crazy,” Beats warned, “Or be here when I get ‘round seven-ish.”
And he wasn’t gonna be vilified for it! Ace didn’t want to do this shit—Ace had to do it. Beats couldn’t afford to walk around aimlessly…that had cost too many lives! Ace needed to be focused. Ace needed to be driven. Ace needed to get home. Ace needed to win. Garnet didn't have a plan? Ace understood that. This place was scary and the reality of what it took to get out even scarier.
Ace was thinking ahead. Beats was trying to win. Stick to the plan--even if the plan ain't good. Anything was plenty. Any plan was better than none at all.Saku wrote:This place is scary. But you've got to start thinking ahead a bit, game's ending soon.
“So this is how it’s gonna go down yo,” Beats steeled his gaze, “You gonna leave your bag and your weapon—right fuckin’ there,” Beats pointed to the spot on the ground, “Then you gonna walk the fuck away and not look back and Imma count to ten.”
Green eyes met green eyes and Ace tried his best to not get burned by the fire in his belly. Beats tried his best to listen only to the rhythm of his heart and not the quivering of his mind.
“I wouldn’t do nuthin’ crazy,” Beats warned, “Or be here when I get ‘round seven-ish.”
In spite of all the times she'd raked herself...
In spite of facing down Marco...
In spite of Erika letting her down...
...Garnet hadn't felt contempt until just now, with his ultimatum hanging in the air.
She sneered at him.
"That plan...
"Is it 'shoot people'?
"Or 'go home'?
"Maybe 'survive'?
"'Live'?"
She could see the ink drying on her death warrant.
"Are you telling yourself it's mercy to let me walk?
"You know exactly what you're doing, dude."
In spite of facing down Marco...
In spite of Erika letting her down...
...Garnet hadn't felt contempt until just now, with his ultimatum hanging in the air.
She sneered at him.
"That plan...
"Is it 'shoot people'?
"Or 'go home'?
"Maybe 'survive'?
"'Live'?"
She could see the ink drying on her death warrant.
"Are you telling yourself it's mercy to let me walk?
"You know exactly what you're doing, dude."
“I do,” Ace conceded, “I got many sins but ignorance ain’t one.”
Beats raised the gun to his eyesight and now he took aim at Garnet.
“I don’t wanna kill nobody else,” Beats spoke uneasily, “I don’t wanna hurt nobody,” Ace didn’t know if he was talking to himself or Garnet, “But what the fuck does want matter?”
Ace shook his head.
“Mercy would be just shootin’ you in the back and walking the fuck away,” Ace felt his confidence swell, “Mercy would be blowin’ my brains out and ending this whole shit once and for all,” that confidence came crashing down in a cascade of doubt—it was replaced by this resigned and resolute rambling, “I ain’t got the stomach for either. You ain't gonna talk me off this ledge.”
He stared holes into Garnet. Ace stared right past her and beyond to the horizon. Beats saw his mom and his dad and his home and all his dreams. Garnet was just standing in the way. Beats had asked her politely to move—twice now.
It wouldn’t be cruel if he forced her to move himself.
“1."
Beats raised the gun to his eyesight and now he took aim at Garnet.
“I don’t wanna kill nobody else,” Beats spoke uneasily, “I don’t wanna hurt nobody,” Ace didn’t know if he was talking to himself or Garnet, “But what the fuck does want matter?”
Ace shook his head.
“Mercy would be just shootin’ you in the back and walking the fuck away,” Ace felt his confidence swell, “Mercy would be blowin’ my brains out and ending this whole shit once and for all,” that confidence came crashing down in a cascade of doubt—it was replaced by this resigned and resolute rambling, “I ain’t got the stomach for either. You ain't gonna talk me off this ledge.”
He stared holes into Garnet. Ace stared right past her and beyond to the horizon. Beats saw his mom and his dad and his home and all his dreams. Garnet was just standing in the way. Beats had asked her politely to move—twice now.
It wouldn’t be cruel if he forced her to move himself.
“1."
"Bullshit. Until it's over, we're alive.
"You've got the choice. That's why want matters.
"2."
"You've got the choice. That's why want matters.
"2."
“This ain’t a game and I ain’t playin' 'round with you!"
It was a unique role reversal—him holding her up and her calling his bluff. Ace felt a strange sense of déjà vu go over him and he saw Faith’s expression stare back at him behind Garnet’s green eyes. For Ace the only thing that mattered when you had a gun out--was whether or not you were willing to use it.
"Hold your head high and die or live and duck,” Beats said finally, “That’s the choice here—get with it or get lost.”
And Ace was with it alright. Beats was swimming in it. Ace took aim at Garnet’s feet. Beats pointed that big twisted and deadly metal at the ground. Was he willing to do this? Even if it wasn’t easy? Even if it could never be anything but hard?
The question marks still remained as Ace’s finger found the trigger.
“3.”
It was a unique role reversal—him holding her up and her calling his bluff. Ace felt a strange sense of déjà vu go over him and he saw Faith’s expression stare back at him behind Garnet’s green eyes. For Ace the only thing that mattered when you had a gun out--was whether or not you were willing to use it.
And he was. Beats was very much willing. Maybe Garnet didn’t get that? Maybe she thought it was worthwhile to call Ace’s bluff? She didn’t know what kinda guy Ace was—or if she did, she didn’t wanna accept it. Denial was a powerful thing...Ace wrote: “I’m gonna disappoint you, y’know?”
Not as powerful as the LMG.Saku wrote: "Yep!"
"Hold your head high and die or live and duck,” Beats said finally, “That’s the choice here—get with it or get lost.”
And Ace was with it alright. Beats was swimming in it. Ace took aim at Garnet’s feet. Beats pointed that big twisted and deadly metal at the ground. Was he willing to do this? Even if it wasn’t easy? Even if it could never be anything but hard?
The question marks still remained as Ace’s finger found the trigger.
“3.”
"Oh don't fuck around.
"Are you cold-blooded, or not?
"What, you trying to paint over some guilt and pretend leaving me for the vultures is better than murder?"
She didn't remember when she'd risen. She stood taller than she ever had. She'd never been more afraid.
"Are you cold-blooded, or not?
"What, you trying to paint over some guilt and pretend leaving me for the vultures is better than murder?"
She didn't remember when she'd risen. She stood taller than she ever had. She'd never been more afraid.
I don’t cry no more, don’t look to the sky no more—have mercy on me, mercy on my soul, somewhere my heart turned cold. Rap lyric for everything. So much had changed and so much had stayed the same.
“You shouldn’t be worried ‘bout vultures when you’re starin’ down a wolf.”
Beats pointed the gun right on her feet. What was the rule out here? Don’t pull out a gun unless you were ready to use it. What did the manual say? Controlled bursts of five shots would conserve ammo and help with aim.
“If it comes down to me and you at the end? I won’t be above murder,” Beats said honestly, “But you think Imma let you have a chance? We walk away today and you shoot me in the back tomorrow?”
Beats swallowed again. Ace felt his mouth go dry and his body get coated in sweat.
“Fuck,” he took a breath, “That,” Ace silenced his doubts, “Shit.”
Ace nodded. Who was the baddest motherfucker on this island? Ace Ortega. 1 in 1000—don’t forget it! Standing 6’3” and weighing 180lbs of pure athlete. Capable of lifting 225lbs 10 times and running a 4.5 40 in the rain with pads on. Beats wasn’t one to be fucked with. Ace was a cut above everybody else out here.
“It ain’t personal, this just the game.”
Ace took aim at her feet and then squeezed the trigger. The gun roared and hot shells poured unto the cliffside. Ace’s ear was ringing and his soul was shaking.
“4!”
“You shouldn’t be worried ‘bout vultures when you’re starin’ down a wolf.”
Beats pointed the gun right on her feet. What was the rule out here? Don’t pull out a gun unless you were ready to use it. What did the manual say? Controlled bursts of five shots would conserve ammo and help with aim.
“If it comes down to me and you at the end? I won’t be above murder,” Beats said honestly, “But you think Imma let you have a chance? We walk away today and you shoot me in the back tomorrow?”
Beats swallowed again. Ace felt his mouth go dry and his body get coated in sweat.
“Fuck,” he took a breath, “That,” Ace silenced his doubts, “Shit.”
Ace nodded. Who was the baddest motherfucker on this island? Ace Ortega. 1 in 1000—don’t forget it! Standing 6’3” and weighing 180lbs of pure athlete. Capable of lifting 225lbs 10 times and running a 4.5 40 in the rain with pads on. Beats wasn’t one to be fucked with. Ace was a cut above everybody else out here.
“It ain’t personal, this just the game.”
Ace took aim at her feet and then squeezed the trigger. The gun roared and hot shells poured unto the cliffside. Ace’s ear was ringing and his soul was shaking.
“4!”
"THEN JUST FUCKING SHOOT—"
He did.
She screamed. She didn't hear herself over the gunfire.
"...Ha...aha...ha...."
Garnet's breath came in ragged fits and spurts. She shook.
"H-hey Ace, th-there's no normal after th-this.
"Y-you're not g-gonna shoot y-your way b-back into c-college b-ball."
He did.
She screamed. She didn't hear herself over the gunfire.
"...Ha...aha...ha...."
Garnet's breath came in ragged fits and spurts. She shook.
"H-hey Ace, th-there's no normal after th-this.
"Y-you're not g-gonna shoot y-your way b-back into c-college b-ball."