Juanita Reid

[Gundham]

Name: Juanita Reid
Gender: Female
Age: 18
Grade: 12
School: John Endecott Memorial Academy
Hobbies and Interests: Classic video games, Christian club, Body Improvement club, Pokemon Go.

Appearance: Juanita is of Irish descent, with fair skin and a smattering of freckles across her cheeks. She stands at an average height of 5’5”, weighing around 130 pounds. She has a slim and athletic yet feminine build with long limbs and a slightly pronounced hourglass body shape, giving her a slender waist, wide-set hips, and a large bust which she usually downplays with with a hunched posture or baggy clothes. She has a lot of faded scars on her legs and from a life spent playing outdoors or participating in athletic activities. Her athletic interests have given her a decent amount of muscle tone, though her recent period of inactivity has softened their definition somewhat.

Her face can be described as boyish and androgynous, and with her choppy hairstyle she could be mistaken for a boy at first glance. Juanita rarely wears makeup, so there’s no hiding her slightly squared jawline and generally sharp features. Her nose is a little bit wide and comes to a slight point, mouth is an average size, although her relatively thin lips make it look slightly bigger. Her eyes are brown with a reddish tint to them. Juanita’s hair is naturally dark, but is currently dyed a light brown. It vaguely resembles a pixie cut, though it’s grown out a bit and her darker roots have clearly begun to show. She doesn’t do much to maintain it, beyond keeping it clean and conditioned.

Subconsciously Juanita tends to hunch forward a bit, both as a means of hiding her form and alleviating some of the back pain it causes. She tore her ACL back in March, and due to some complications she still occasionally has to wear a black knee brace on her right leg. Her sense of fashion is relatively bland; she hates girly clothing, and prefers to dress in baggy clothes or sweats.

She was wearing a casual outfit when she was abducted: a red tank top under a thick black zip-up hoodie hoodie for weather, and jeans with her knee brace over her right leg, as well as beat-up red and white athletic sneakers.

Biography: Juanita is the fourth child of Gary and Colleen Reid, a middle-aged Irish Catholic couple. She has three brothers, Jeremy (now 27), Daniel (now 25), and Patrick (now 24). The boys had been born almost exactly eighteen months apart, but Patrick was already halfway through kindergarten when Juanita was conceived. Gary and Colleen hadn't traveled much, on a whim they took a vacation to Cancun to celebrate Gary's 15th anniversary at work. They disliked the beach resort and the hot environment, and wound up spending most of the vacation in their hotel room. They struck up a friendship with the hotel's day concierge, a young woman named Juanita. When Colleen unexpectedly became pregnant, the couple chose to name their daughter after their new friend.

The Reids’ house was somewhat too small for all of the children, but the mortgage was locked in. Colleen stayed at home with the kids. She hoped that Juanita would add some femininity to the house, but Juanita had no interest in dolls or girly clothing. She was more interested in playing with her brothers, but they had little interest in her, due to their age and gender differences.

Juanita and her brothers were often left to play outside, spending their time at side streets and playgrounds so their mother could hear herself think. The boys were now in the phase of life where nicknames mattered. They called each other Jer and Dan and Pat, and on days where they let Juanita joined in, they called her Juan. Most other days, however, they ran off without her, and she was forced to walk home by herself to play in the front yard.

In school, Juanita was an average student. She liked other kids, and often enjoyed participating in group activities. She wasn’t a gifted student, and lagged behind in reading and writing. She did her best to keep up with things she was supposed to learn, but was driven less by interest than a fear of failing grades and parental lectures. She disliked being cooped up in a classroom. The only parts of school she enjoyed were recess and gym class, because they gave her excuses to go out and run.

Juanita’s parents signed her up for soccer when she was nine. She loved having an excuse to run as fast as she could, and loved being cheered for. Her teammates called her by her nickname, Juan, which she took as a sign of respect. She sometimes was overly aggressive in pursuit of the ball, and had to be reminded that soccer was a team sport. Over a few seasons, she managed to curb her competitive spirit and become more of a team player.

This period brought some changes to the Reid family dynamic. Jer had graduated and moved out to attend trade school, and Dan planned to move in with him after graduation. Pat was sixteen, and making a name for himself as a party animal. The boys were rarely at home, but they occasionally made time for Juanita. Pat was the one who taught her to play video games. Colleen wasn’t a fan of electronic entertainment or video games in particular, but the boys had been gifted an old Super Nintendo. Juanita preferred co-operative games with her brothers, including Super Mario World, Goof Troop, and the Donkey Kong series. She's also pretty good at competitive games like Mario Kart and Bomberman, but lags far behind her brothers' skill level. The boys have since moved on to newer consoles, but Juanita still prefers the classics she grew up with.

When she got into middle school, Juanita encountered lacrosse for the first time. She loved the strategy and precision it required, and soon convinced her parents to allow her to make the switch from soccer to a youth lacrosse league.

Middle school brought a lot of challenges for Juanita. Her Catholic upbringing occasionally led her into conflict with other students, as she was a strident rule-follower and didn’t like to see other people breaking rules. Since the children were old enough, Colleen went back to work. she became a part-time classroom assistant, helping a number of special needs students at Juanita's school. This caused Juanita some embarrassment, and she asked her mother not to talk to her during the school day.

At the same time, her body sprouted and became quite curvaceous, which caused her a number of difficulties. She found athletics much harder, and struggled to find clothes that fit. Boys gave her unwanted attention, and some girls spread nasty rumors about her. Some of these rumors used her nickname, Juan, pejoratively to imply she was transgender; she has stopped using it as a result. She reported the bullying, which got her labeled a snitch, but got the rumors to die down a little. She started wearing baggy clothes and avoided talking to most boys in class, which eventually got the to move on to other targets. Since then, she's almost always dressed in loose clothes unless she's working out, and goes out of her way to change privately. She reacts poorly to comments about her body or her appearance, and remains skeptical of boys who show interest in her.

In high school, Juanita tried out for John Endecott Memorial’s lacrosse team, and became a midfielder. The sport occupied most of her free time and gave her a sense of belonging. She was proud to be part of a successful team, and got along well with her teammates. She didn’t do much to draw attention to herself outside of the team, not wanting to repeat her experiences in middle school. Her grades remained average, and she struggled in both math and science.

During this period, Juanita found herself as the only child consistently at home. Jeremy married and moved out of the place he shared with Daniel, and Patrick lived at home, but was studying at community college in Danvers, and often stayed with classmates instead of commuting back to Salem. This dynamic changed during the pandemic. Dan was laid off and moved back home, and a lack of in-person classes eliminated Colleen's job and sent Patrick home. The family was forced to get by on Gary's income from the grocery store, supplemented with Dan's unemployment. Colleen occasionally works as a tutor, but the hours were unsteady.

Juanita found the home situation stifling and took walks whenever she could. She downloaded Pokemon Go to give herself an excuse to get out and about. She initially had little attachment to the game, using it as an excuse to get out of the house. But she found the creatures cute, and enjoyed collecting them. She developed a genuine interest, and still plays the game whenever she goes for a walk.

When she wasn't out walking, Juanita invested some of her free time figuring out her college prospects. She tried to secure a lacrosse scholarship, hoping to play in Division I. She signed up for a recruiting site and contacted a number of college and university coaches. She was disappointed to find out that scholarships were limited and often covered only a small portion of tuition. Juanita was turned down by every Division I school she applied to, but was offered a shot at a scholarship at Assumption University, in Division II. She was disappointed not to make Division I, but Assumption was a Catholic school and comparatively affordable, so she believed God was leading her there. She began to work harder in her studies, intent on maintaining good grades to increase her chances of being accepted.

Unfortunately, Juanita’s plans were derailed in early April of 2021. During a lacrosse game she tore the ACL in her right leg. The injury was bad enough to require surgery. Gary's job didn’t offer much in the way of health insurance, and the operation put a significant strain on the family’s finances. Her surgery went fine, but her recovery was slow and painful. She was on crutches longer than most patients, and the swelling in her knee persisted. But she hated being cooped up in her house and grew impatient, frustrated by her body’s failures. She often walked further than she was supposed to, pretending that she'd just gotten caught up in Pokemon Go and lost track; the truth was that she thought she was strong enough to push the limits of her therapy and could recover faster as a result. This mindset only hindered the process and made her pain worse, until she was forced to take painkillers.

When Juanita's pain didn't subside, doctors concluded that there were two problems. Juanita had opted for a hamstring graft, hoping that it would let her back on the field sooner. This procedure harvested tendons from elsewhere in her knee, but these relocated tendons weren't completely adhering to the bone. This problem was compounded by excess pressure on the ACL; removing tendons from other muscle units forced the new joint to handle more than it was capable of. In June she had a revision surgery to correct these problems, using allograft. This corrected most of her issues, and by August she was able to jog again with a knee brace, but with the new graft she wouldn’t be returning to lacrosse for at least a year, and her scholarship evaporated. She still wears the knee brace to run, jog, or stand for extended periods. Even though she is well into recovery, her knee still occasionally causes her low to moderate pain. Her doctors have suggested that these pains are psychosomatic. Juanita is terrified of another graft failure. She tries to minimize what she feels, ignoring or pushing through the pain as best as she can.

Juanita doesn’t associate much with her old teammates, or Endecott’s athletes in general aside from Body Improvement club. It’s emotionally painful for her not to be able to be a part of that world anymore, and those emotions can trigger psychosomatic pain as well. The team had been her primary social circle, so Juanita is now taking steps to be more social outside of it. She attends parties when she's invited. She doesn't drink and often leaves before anything crazy happens, but she likes to be part of the crowd. She still doesn't like to attract attention, but she's friendly and enjoys talking to her classmates, often eating lunch with one or two friends that she enjoys talking to from classes. Her reputation is that she tends to be a bit of a social butterfly; she's not afraid to join conversations she finds interesting, and likes to meet new people. She has a good sense of humor, and is quick to laugh at other people's jokes. However, she is somewhat guarded in going beyond acquaintanceships; it takes a lot of trust for her to talk to someone about sports or her leg. However, She does occasionally seek out other people with injuries or struggles, hoping to learn from their perspective and get better at coping.

Romance isn't something Juanita thinks about often. She is very cautious in this area. She's gone on a few non-exclusive dates with boys who seemed safe enough, mostly for practice. These experiments fizzled out, due to lack of connection or when it became clear that Juanita had no interest in getting physical before marriage. She does find some boys in school attractive, but she tends to be into athletic guys and doesn't think she has much to offer. Her self-consciousness prevents her from ever going beyond gossip.

Juanita has maintained her Catholic faith and morals, but she’s currently very angry with God, and doesn’t understand why He would allow her life to be ruined the way it was. This has created some friction with her parents. Colleen thinks Juanita just needs to pray through her pain and anger, and Gary is distant. He is a meek sort of man, kind-hearted but out of his depth with Juanita's struggles. Gary still works at the supermarket, and handles closing shifts in the afternoon and evening, so he isn’t around very much. He doesn't relate to Juanita well, and they don't talk about anything in depth. Her relationships with her brothers are better: Jer is off doing his own thing, but they Zoom sometimes. Dan is actively looking for jobs, and grouchy with the rest of the family, but he and Patrick both enjoy gaming with her. She's still not at their level, especially when they goad her into playing newer Halo games or other shooters, but can give them a good run at SNES games. Game duels remain the Reid siblings' primary method of resolving disputes over chores or making wagers. She enjoys these times with her brothers, feeling that the age gap has been collapsed a bit in their adulthood, and made them easier to relate to. All three of them struggle, and in the rare times they talk about it, the others listen.

Juanita signed up for Christian club at the start of high school, thinking it would be good to have connections to fellow believers. She still attends, mostly as a way of trying to stay faithful while working through her frustration and confusion. During prayer time Juanita will talk about her leg and how frustrated she is. The group can't offer her anything but thoughts and prayers; she accepts these but privately doesn't think they help. She enjoys hearing other people's struggles, since it makes her feel like she isn't the only one who questions what God is doing, and is often happy to pray for others. She tries to do so every night, but sometimes forgets or is too frustrated to feel like doing it.

She’s also an infrequent member of the Body Improvement club, which she joined in May. The club promotes body conditioning and good health, with a slight lean towards military recruiting. Juanita is uninterested in the military, but thought the club would provide a social support for her therapy and speed her recovery. Even after her setback and the loss of her scholarship, Juanita still uses the club as an accountability system, checking in with them to report how she's recovering physically. It helps her to still feel like an athlete, without triggering the pain that her old clubs do.

Juanita’s not sure what she wants to do when she grows up. With athletics scholarships out of reach, her grades aren’t good enough to get by on academics, and there’s nothing else she feels passionate enough about to risk taking on a full load of student loan debt. She’ll have to make a decision soon enough about whether to apply. If she does, she’ll want to go to a Christian school, most likely Gordon College. Currently she’s leaning towards taking a gap year and earning some money to see if she can afford it.

Advantages: Juanita’s sports background has given her very good strategic and spatial abilities. She’s instinctively good at tracking large numbers of people and objects at once, anticipating how they’ll move and responding accordingly. She has high endurance, and can stay active for long periods of time. She’s also used to performing under pressure and can keep a level head in most situations.
Disadvantages: Juanita has an obvious weak spot in her injured leg, and is at a severe disadvantage when it comes to maneuvering, jumping, or climbing. Walking for extended periods will put her in pain. Her knee brace will allow her to run, but only in a straight line; she has little or no agility and if she’s forced to dodge around trees or objects she’ll be in a lot of trouble.

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Hello there Gundham, and welcome to your first critique! Juanita is temporarily DENIED based on some needed edits that I will walk you through below.

Generally speaking, the Hobbies and Interests list should encompass things that the character takes part in regularly and ostensibly enjoys. If Juanita no longer takes part in soccer and lacrosse as a participant, does she still follow the school teams or any college or professional teams? If she's stopped participating in the sports either as an athlete or a spectator, what qualifies them as a continuing hobby or interest?

Juanita’s hair is a light brown, and vaguely resembles a pixie cut, though it’s grown out a bit and the darker roots have begun to show.

Is Juanita's hair dyed? The way this is worded makes it sound like her hair has been colored and the natural color is beginning to show as it grows out.

As I read through the profile, I see a lot of extraneous details. I'm going to dissect the opening paragraph of the profile to explain, but in general, the entire thing can be trimmed down to just the most important information about Juanita's life.

Colleen is a heavy-set, matronly sort of woman with a loud voice and prematurely greying hair, courtesy of Juanita’s three brothers, Jeremy, Daniel, and Patrick.

Colleen's appearance isn't a necessary detail for the profile, especially given that none of the rest of Juanita's family members are described physically. The more important information here is the fact that Juanita has three older brothers, so that should be the focus rather than information that's tacked on at the end. Additionally, I'd like for the boys' ages to be clearly stated.

Gary found himself celebrating twenty years of middle management at a local grocery. Since this coincided with a particularly profitable quarter, the company decided to reward him with a weeklong stay at The Grand Oasis, a low-tier resort complex in Cancun. Gary and Colleen were homebodies who had never traveled further than Boston; it took them only half a day to decide that Mexico’s sun was too harsh, its beaches too crowded, its streets too confusing. The two of them hunkered down in their hotel room for the rest of the week, subsisting entirely on room service. This arrangement resulted in Gary and Colleen becoming good phone friends with the day concierge, a young woman named Juanita. They would later regard their pleasant chats with Juanita as one of the only bright spots of the trip, and when Colleen unexpectedly became pregnant they bequeathed her name to their daughter.

This entire section can be cut down to something along the lines of "Gary and Colleen took a vacation to Cancun to celebrate Gary's 20th anniversary at work. Unfortunately, the beach resort and the hot environment weren't to their liking, so they spent most of the vacation in their hotel room. They struck up a friendship with the hotel's day concierge, a young woman named Juanita, and when Colleen unexpectedly became pregnant, the couple chose to name their daughter after their new friend."

You don't have to copy that wording exactly, but you can see that with all of the fluff cut out, the section is about half as long, and the important facts are easier to get to. All of the following paragraphs need the same treatment. I can tell you put a lot of work into this, and I would recommend maybe saving some of the lines that need to be cut throughout the profile so they could be re-used in a pregame or memory thread that goes into more elaborate detail about Juanita's history and home life.

In high school, Juanita tried out for John Endicott Memorial’s lacrosse team

The school's name is John Endecott with an e.

How did Juanita feel about not being able to attain her original goal of getting a scholarship to a school with a Division I lacrosse team?

I'm a bit confused about the details of Juanita's surgery. ACL reconstruction is a common and low-risk surgery that's preceded and followed by physical therapy, so if there were complications stemming from it, they would in all likelihood have been noticed and attended to. The part about her making the injury worse by pushing herself too hard and trying to get back into her regular activity too fast is good, I'm just not clear right now on what the other issues are or where they're stemming from. I'm also curious about the insurance situation that's mentioned; if Gary's been working at the same place for over 30 years at this point, and his workplace is in the habit of handing out all-expenses-paid vacations to longtime employees and such, they probably also provide family health insurance that would cover a good portion of an outpatient procedure like an ACL reconstruction.

This leads me to further questions about Juanita's parents and their occupations. Does Colleen work at all, or has she been a stay-at-home mom for all of Juanita's life? Is Gary still working at the grocery store? How present is he in Juanita's life in general? He pretty much disappears from the profile after the very first paragraph.

Most of Juanita's hobbies outside of sports need expansion. Video games, Pokemon Go, and her clubs only get a passing mention. What sort of classic games does she like and why? What does she like about Pokemon Go in particular? How much does she play any of these games currently; her knee injury limiting her ability to walk seems like it would impact her ability to play Pokemon Go especially, since that's a core part of the game. When did she start attending the Christian club, and what do they do? Same with the body improvement club.

I'd like more detail about Juanita's current social life in general. I don't have a good picture of who her friends are or if she is really close with anyone. She doesn't like attention from boys, but does she have any crushes or other romantic prospects herself? What sort of reputation does she have? What's her current relationship with her siblings and parents like?

I know this may seem like a lot, but don't feel discouraged! Juanita does look very good, and it's mostly the tone of the profile that needs to be tightened up and other areas of interest that need more details. Feel free to message me if you have any questions about the requested edits.

[Gundham]

Thanks for the feedback!

I've made some pretty substantial edits, which hopefully correct the tonal issues while giving more detail to the sections that were a bit underexplained.

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