A pause, as Ren shifted their weight.
A note of strain entered their voice when they said, "Was there anything else, that she said? Or, just, anything else that was...like, going on?"
We Will Find You- Acting on your best behavior, turn your back on Mother Nature
Bones lay in here (deaththread)
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BlizzardeyeWonder
- Posts: 1086
- Joined: Mon Aug 13, 2018 3:41 pm
- Location: the shadow realm
Meena paused, thinking.
"An avalanche brought..." She glanced at the dead goats, as if they had any ideas.
Was there really anything else going on? Anything worth mentioning? Anything that an outsider would point out? Anything Millie actually realized was happening? Unfortunately, Meena couldn't beam her thoughts into other people's heads which made her look crazy.
Honestly? Good!
...well, there was one thing. "She... Laughed at..."
"An avalanche brought..." She glanced at the dead goats, as if they had any ideas.
Was there really anything else going on? Anything worth mentioning? Anything that an outsider would point out? Anything Millie actually realized was happening? Unfortunately, Meena couldn't beam her thoughts into other people's heads which made her look crazy.
Honestly? Good!
...well, there was one thing. "She... Laughed at..."
Ren made a 'go on' motion with their hand, before realizing that Meena couldn't see them.
"Laughed at...?"
"Laughed at...?"
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BlizzardeyeWonder
- Posts: 1086
- Joined: Mon Aug 13, 2018 3:41 pm
- Location: the shadow realm
"Me." Meena thought that was obvious.
She rose to her feet, shotgun pointed down at the ground at her side.
She rose to her feet, shotgun pointed down at the ground at her side.
And with that, Ren was left without questions.
They closed their eyes, suddenly tired. Cedar dead, and now both Kitty and Meena were murderers. It was all just happening so fast. They had known it was coming, had braced themself, and yet here they were, struggling to believe what they already knew to be true. The answers Meena had been giving could only ever have led to one conclusion.
Ren inhaled deeply, sharply, and the day, thin and white, was glass in their lungs.
"I..."
What on Earth are you doing, Meena? What the hell is going on?
Perhaps they should circle around, so that they could see Meena's face. Ren took a few tentative steps forward--and then stopped, and looked away, for they suddenly found that they couldn't bear to look at Meena at all. It was as though they couldn't bear to meet her gaze, even though Meena was already facing away from them.
Right. So maybe there was something more than a little alien about Meena right now. That didn't change the fact that they were the only one of Ren's friends that they had found, the only friend that they could help at that moment. More importantly, it didn't change the fact that she was Ren's friend.
Ren moved forward until they were standing at Meena's side. Without turning to look at her, they said, "You know, you're not going to be able to talk me into hating you, right?"
Their gaze flickered, unavoidably, to the corpse. The head was more meat than human, which made it oddly okay. Really it was the rest of the body that disturbed Ren--the parts of Millie that still looked like her, but rendered inanimate.
"I...I wish you would stop trying to do that."
So please don't kill anyone else trying to prove something to me, they were tempted to add, but it sounded ridiculously self-centered and presumptuous when you put it that way. As though proving something to Ren was the only reason Millie's face had been reduced to meat.
And, Ren reminded themself, looking from Millie to the wreckage of goat corpses and trees--Millie had already been mortally wounded. People don't survive that kind of leg fracture, out here. It was probably naive, but Ren still held out hope that Meena had done the math, realized that Millie would die a slow, painful death without her intervention, and determined that this was likely her only chance to experience cathartic anger in an entirely ethical manner.
Ren shivered. Really, who were they kidding. But the possibility was there, and while it was there, they could still believe that they wouldn't need to worry about Meena killing again.
"We should go," they said at last. "Millie was right--for once--when she said it wasn't safe to stay here."
Ignorance, blissful or otherwise, was something they couldn't afford to keep--but perhaps they could hang onto it for a little while, until they had worked out how to give it up.
They closed their eyes, suddenly tired. Cedar dead, and now both Kitty and Meena were murderers. It was all just happening so fast. They had known it was coming, had braced themself, and yet here they were, struggling to believe what they already knew to be true. The answers Meena had been giving could only ever have led to one conclusion.
Ren inhaled deeply, sharply, and the day, thin and white, was glass in their lungs.
"I..."
What on Earth are you doing, Meena? What the hell is going on?
Perhaps they should circle around, so that they could see Meena's face. Ren took a few tentative steps forward--and then stopped, and looked away, for they suddenly found that they couldn't bear to look at Meena at all. It was as though they couldn't bear to meet her gaze, even though Meena was already facing away from them.
Right. So maybe there was something more than a little alien about Meena right now. That didn't change the fact that they were the only one of Ren's friends that they had found, the only friend that they could help at that moment. More importantly, it didn't change the fact that she was Ren's friend.
Ren moved forward until they were standing at Meena's side. Without turning to look at her, they said, "You know, you're not going to be able to talk me into hating you, right?"
Their gaze flickered, unavoidably, to the corpse. The head was more meat than human, which made it oddly okay. Really it was the rest of the body that disturbed Ren--the parts of Millie that still looked like her, but rendered inanimate.
"I...I wish you would stop trying to do that."
So please don't kill anyone else trying to prove something to me, they were tempted to add, but it sounded ridiculously self-centered and presumptuous when you put it that way. As though proving something to Ren was the only reason Millie's face had been reduced to meat.
And, Ren reminded themself, looking from Millie to the wreckage of goat corpses and trees--Millie had already been mortally wounded. People don't survive that kind of leg fracture, out here. It was probably naive, but Ren still held out hope that Meena had done the math, realized that Millie would die a slow, painful death without her intervention, and determined that this was likely her only chance to experience cathartic anger in an entirely ethical manner.
Ren shivered. Really, who were they kidding. But the possibility was there, and while it was there, they could still believe that they wouldn't need to worry about Meena killing again.
"We should go," they said at last. "Millie was right--for once--when she said it wasn't safe to stay here."
Ignorance, blissful or otherwise, was something they couldn't afford to keep--but perhaps they could hang onto it for a little while, until they had worked out how to give it up.
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BlizzardeyeWonder
- Posts: 1086
- Joined: Mon Aug 13, 2018 3:41 pm
- Location: the shadow realm
Meena turned quickly, foisted her bag onto her shoulder, and walked away - like Ren suggested, for once.
What Meena wanted to ask was... Why? How could Ren even recognize their friend in her? Sure, they looked the same in the basic outline. Wore the same outfits, had the same face. That was only skin deep, surely. Everything Ren knew about her was only skin deep, superficial shit like hobbies and mannerisms. What even was there to cling to now?
Meena would have argued, but her voice would have cracked. She wiped her palm over her nose, leaving a smear of blood on her face. She kept her back to Ren as she walked, speeding up a bit to keep it that way.
If Meena actually cried over any of this, anything she'd done, especially over anything Ren said, then she was truly worthless.
[Meena Kumar continued in Grief Seed]
What Meena wanted to ask was... Why? How could Ren even recognize their friend in her? Sure, they looked the same in the basic outline. Wore the same outfits, had the same face. That was only skin deep, surely. Everything Ren knew about her was only skin deep, superficial shit like hobbies and mannerisms. What even was there to cling to now?
Meena would have argued, but her voice would have cracked. She wiped her palm over her nose, leaving a smear of blood on her face. She kept her back to Ren as she walked, speeding up a bit to keep it that way.
If Meena actually cried over any of this, anything she'd done, especially over anything Ren said, then she was truly worthless.
[Meena Kumar continued in Grief Seed]
And so she went, without a word.
Ren followed, needless to say (oh, but they wished they had something to say). Whatever catharsis Meena had found, it didn't seem to be good for her now. Which was--worrying, to understate things, though reassuring in some ways. She was visibly worse, somehow, or she seemed so to Ren. The wheels in Ren's brain spun, and spun, and spun, but it was all useless. Ren was utterly useless. They had no more ideas. They had not a clue of what to do for Meena, who needed something--help, someone to be there for them, support, a shoulder to cry on, a hug, a listening ear, something--but didn't want it, and refused to accept it.
Ren, by and large, was okay with being someone who was merely tolerated. It was their lot, and always had been, and if just a handful of people actually wanted their presence, then they were happy enough. Even if nobody really wanted their presence, even when tolerance was all there was, Ren could subsist--so long as they could be useful in some way, so long as they could make some kind of difference that justified their continued presence, that demonstrated that they really had been there (in a vaguely beneficial way).
If, however, they weren't wanted by anyone; if there was nobody who could and would make use of them; if they couldn't be found in lives outside of their own--then, what even was Ren? Where can they be found?
Oh, but of course--Ren was an adjective. Their existence had always been predicated on being felt through that which they modify.
[Ren Vu continued in Witch Barrier]
Ren followed, needless to say (oh, but they wished they had something to say). Whatever catharsis Meena had found, it didn't seem to be good for her now. Which was--worrying, to understate things, though reassuring in some ways. She was visibly worse, somehow, or she seemed so to Ren. The wheels in Ren's brain spun, and spun, and spun, but it was all useless. Ren was utterly useless. They had no more ideas. They had not a clue of what to do for Meena, who needed something--help, someone to be there for them, support, a shoulder to cry on, a hug, a listening ear, something--but didn't want it, and refused to accept it.
Ren, by and large, was okay with being someone who was merely tolerated. It was their lot, and always had been, and if just a handful of people actually wanted their presence, then they were happy enough. Even if nobody really wanted their presence, even when tolerance was all there was, Ren could subsist--so long as they could be useful in some way, so long as they could make some kind of difference that justified their continued presence, that demonstrated that they really had been there (in a vaguely beneficial way).
If, however, they weren't wanted by anyone; if there was nobody who could and would make use of them; if they couldn't be found in lives outside of their own--then, what even was Ren? Where can they be found?
Oh, but of course--Ren was an adjective. Their existence had always been predicated on being felt through that which they modify.
[Ren Vu continued in Witch Barrier]