Ray Janeczek

[Cicada]

Name: Raimundo ‘Ray’ Gomes Janeczek
Gender: Male
Age: 18
Grade: Senior
School: Southwest Red Rock High School
Hobbies and Interests: Music and attending concerts, voice acting, horror media, video games, anime and manga, Magic: The Gathering, queer art, veganism, programming, firearms

Appearance: Ray is a white-passing Hispanic man. He has fair skin with a warm undertone. Ray stands at 5’11” and is slightly overweight at an average of 190 lb, with no apparent musculature. His weight is distributed in a pear shape. His hair is black, wavy, and naturally voluminous. It is styled into a messy shag short of his neck with bangs covering his eyes. He rarely has any visible beard stubble. Ray is ambidextrous and has soft hands.

Ray has a heart shaped face with a sharp, narrow chin. He has expressive almond eyes with russet brown irises. He has a tall and slender nose. He has thin lips. He has noticeably clear skin and few visible pores. He has very heavy under eye circles. His eyebrows are groomed but not styled. Ray sometimes wears black lipstick and eyeliner. His voice is androgynously pitched, and he has the ability to change his vocal qualities to be passably feminine, along with a number of other impressions. He is also capable of vocal screamo and growl with comfortable technique. He is fluent in his native Portuguese.

Ray has double-helix silver chain piercings and onyx stud piercings. He has a single red ink tattoo, evocative of the facial tattoos of the character Massacre Girl from Magic: the Gathering, on the side of his right shoulder. Ray wears a repetitive wardrobe, preferring monochrome. He opts for figure flattening clothes like baggy joggers and hoodies. He likes using metal chains as outfit accents.

On the day of the abduction Ray was wearing a baggy black hoodie emblazoned over the chest the logo art of student band Finest in Niflhel in white. Under this he wore a sleeveless gray camisole. He was wearing baggy black joggers with two chains on his left side, one extending from pocket to knee and the other slightly longer. He wore black lace up ankle boots. In addition he wore his black eyeliner and lipstick, and wore a steel chain tassel ring on his left hand, chains connecting his middle three fingers and his wrist.

Biography: Raimundo was born September 21, 2006 in São Paulo, Brazil. His younger sister Nathalia was born six years after him. His mother, Alessandra, was a stay at home mother; his father Eduardo was a technician in a computer and phone repair shop. Ray’s grandparents on his mother’s side were wealthy landowners. Alessandra had eloped against their wishes, and they only reconnected for Ray’s sake.

As a child Ray was friendly to everyone including adults. He was inquisitive, always asking questions. From a young age he would often hang out where his dad worked, leading to him developing a curiosity for computers from a young age. He also bonded with his father over his dad’s music tastes. Eduardo liked to collect music from the States, bands like Blink-182 and Rise Against. Ray also developed a taste for alternative bands like Dance Gavin Dance and Asking Alexandria.

When he began schooling Ray’s grandparents invested the money to send him to a private preschool. Ray was above average in school and picked up on new concepts quickly. From a young age he was passive and timid around peers. He experienced bullying as aggressive peers, usually men, would pick on him. Ray internalized the taunts and insults. He had few friends, usually women, and did not like talking about school at home.

Approaching the end of his first year of Brazil’s equivalent of elementary school, Ray was informed that the family planned to emigrate to the United States. Eduardo had secured a sales job in a regional B2B hardware supplier. Ray began school in Las Vegas as a second grader. The family’s finances improved to solidly middle class. As a family they have returned to Brazil every summer since, allowing Ray to maintain his close relationship with his grandparents. Ray had some English foundation but he was designated as an ESL student. His parents additionally put him in supplemental English classes outside of school. Many of his initial friends in the United States were friends he made who were in similar programs to assist people with communication issues, such as his lifelong friend Mortimer Schaub. He noted a strange discomfort around and jealousy of women. He didn’t want to make himself a target for bullying and did not act on his latent desire to feminize his presentation.

He was a heavy gamer for most of elementary school and found comfortable socializing online. His favourite genre was shooter games, he was an avid player of the Call of Duty and Counter-Strike games. Ray took gaming seriously and played solo ranked consistently, being fairly skilled. Friends also introduced him to anime and manga. He became a collector of manga. Specifically, he was attracted to age-inappropriate material like the Higurashi series and Mirai Nikki. He found he had a good stomach for gore and dark material at a young age, and actively sought out this manner of media, eventually getting into horror movies and literature as his English improved. Horror thrills him, and he has a natural affinity for the artistry of the genre.

Ray’s younger sister Nathalia was difficult to deal with. As a toddler she constantly had outbursts and temper tantrums. She would verbally bully and harass both family and peers, regularly landing in trouble with teachers. A family therapist diagnosed oppositional defiant disorder. While Nathalia was eventually able to function in school and at home, she required a lot of attention and remained prone to outbursts. This exhausted everyone in the household, especially Ray, who had to deal with emotional responsibilities difficult for a child of his age to navigate. He became patient and considerate, but struggled with burnout and quiet resentment of his place in the family dynamic.

As he entered the latter half of his elementary school years Ray’s reached a comfortable fluency with English and his grades picked back up. At school Ray interacted little outside of his small circles. He developed an identity through social media and forums. He would join arguments on Reddit and on forums dedicated to fictional media such as TV Tropes. Through this medium Ray’s conscientiousness and budding opinions on politics had a place to flourish. He researched his positions and developed a generally leftist mindset. Specifically he began to eat less meat at meals due to his developing ethics.

As Ray entered puberty his exposure to queer culture on Twitter and Reddit resonated with him, but discomfort with the idea of exploring a transgender identity led Ray to instead identify with femboy culture. He developed an affinity with the semi-ironic self-hatred and misanthropy of the /lgbt/ board. He did not use this sort of language publicly but he began to extensively integrate these ideas into his headspace.

Ray took to amateur voice actors through exposure from social media. He developed a degree of skill with it over time and developed proper technique through regular practice. Additionally he would sing and growl along to his favorite post-hardcore and emo songs from his childhood and also developed skills with these overtime. He started to go to concerts held locally in Vegas with his parents blessing, often with his dad due to their shared music tastes. Despite his enjoyment of this he did not pursue anything relevant joining one of his peers' bands. He was cynical about a potentially unstable career. Additionally, his discomfort with exploring his gender identity led him to not use his femme voice, despite mastering it quickly.

His father recommended getting into the tech field, where he could connect Ray to mentors. Ray had already been looking into making game mods with friends. He started to spend time on studying programming, motivated to learn primarily through projects with friends like a horror-themed mod for Fallout: New Vegas that they would release to small success. Working in groups helped him enjoy wasn’t the most inherently fun activity for himself.

While initially disinterested in romance Ray eventually met his first girlfriend in the latter half of his seventh grade year. He had joined the anime club, where he often doodled with preference for drawing men loving men. Another club member, Cho Yun-seo, took notice and the two bonded over a mutual interest in boys' love manga. They officially became a couple after a few months. Ray found affection made him feel more comfortable in his own body and quieted his anxiety. He weaned himself off his doom scrolling obsessions for a while.

As eighth grade Ray’s overall confident outlook led him to decide to take another major life decision, and he adopted veganism as a lifestyle. It gave him a reason to focus more on developing his craft as a cook. He knew the basics, but now could discover ways to make his new lifestyle delicious. He often cooked his own meals from then on, separate from his family. This new lifestyle choice came shortly before the COVID pandemic shutdowns. Quarantine led to stress with family as he found himself regularly arguing with them over his decision to go vegan. He and Yeo-sun likewise argued a lot over his choice to adopt veganism. Yun-seo eventually set an ultimatum that Ray drop his veganism, and Ray could not do so for her sake. They broke up in short order, with Yun-seo additionally accusing Ray of being a closeted gay man. Ray took the fallout of the break up poorly. He began to catastrophize and self-identify with labels such as being an incel. His exes’ homophobic accusations also led him to develop further alienation from his own dysphoria and budding queer identity.

When he graduated into Red Rock, Ray joined a bunch of clubs of his interests on campus, like the horror and anime club. In horror club he came to be associated most with artistic and aesthetic horror such as Suspira and Skinamarink, and he also became an avid reader of horror novels that touched on themes of dysphoria, body horror, and alienation. He continued to draw and doodle queer art depicting male and female homosexuality as a way of processing his very complicated feelings. He had come to associate doing this with positive attention, given how it had briefly won him the love of Yun-seo. He began drawing this form of art in public settings, as he did not draw anything explicit or particularly suggestive, and it would become something he was known for.

He stayed on an advanced track in high school, keeping perfect grades and building a strong resume with his contributions as an amateur programmer to modding work. His sole poor subject would be PE. Due to how much time he spends seated, working on his projects and socializing through gaming, he has already begun to develop issues with chronic pain. He has a general disinterest in being physically active even in class. His mile times are horrible, he lacks flexibility, and he is easily tired from physical exertion beyond walking.

Ray had a passing interest in Magic: The Gathering, having played on Arena and untap.in occasionally, but building real decks became a strong indulgence he could deep dive into. He joined the school’s Magic: The Gathering club. He also joined the cooking club, where he was a quiet advocate for cooking vegan food.

Despite his packed schedule and productivity Ray continued to feel empty and alienated and fixated on the idea that only another relationship could heal him. Only a month into his freshman year Ray jumped at the opportunity. The woman, Marianne Romano, was a twenty-four year old living in Moncton, New Brunswick. The two met through a Discord dedicated to the popular game Valorant and Marianne aggressively pursued Ray. Marianne heavily flattered and validated Ray by praising his intelligence and maturity. She also considered herself an amateur indie game developer and Ray did some voice work for her.

Ray did not discuss his relationship with friends or family. Despite being very happy to have someone paying intimate attention to him he remained depressed and hyper self-critical, internalizing Marianne’s hurtful comments during arguments. Marianne often ignored Ray’s sexual boundaries and would apologize only after pushing a voice or video call far past Ray’s given consent. He pushed through his intensifying discomfort to appease her. The relationship lasted through Ray’s sophomore year. Several plans to meet fell apart due to Ray’s lack of independence as a minor. Marianne grew increasingly impatient and mean. One-sided arguments and accusations became frequent. The two existed in a cycle of love-bombing for some time before Marianne unceremoniously ghosted Ray.

Ray fully internalized that he had deep flaws that made him unworthy of love and affection. He put on a strong face for the sake of not worrying others. His poor mental health began to take a turn for the worse as he started to self-harm. In the month following Marianne ghosting him Ray regularly cut in easily hidden locations. Self harm kept the intensely dark turn of his thought patterns from spiraling into suicidal thoughts. Due to the trivialization of self harm common in the online communities he was a regular of he didn’t truly believe that something was seriously wrong with this means of coping.

Ray stabilized during the summer between his sophomore and junior years. Even in a relatively lucid state he was still determined to keep his continued mental health struggles to himself. He focused on staying productive to distract himself. He began to play a leadership role in the Magic: The Gathering club. He took some pride in stepping up to help the small club boost membership and activity.

Regardless of his efforts to distract himself Ray often had sleepless nights filled with rumination and doom scrolling. His poor mental health made it difficult for him to internalize positive thoughts on activism and changing the world. The only thing he was at least certain enough to implement was the importance of harm reduction, and doing right by others, even if that meant self-sacrifice.

Through his associations with alt culture and anarchism on social media he began to feel a strong affinity for body modification. He had plans to get a number of piercings and tattoos as he grows older. His parents passive-aggressively mock his aesthetic choices and even getting basic studs caused them to meanly call him gay and pathetic, especially his traditionalist father. His general relationship with his parents has degraded and their affection for him is infrequent, making it clear they prefer his younger sister.

His impulse to fill the emptiness with a romantic relationship continued, despite his bad experiences. His thoughtful, diplomatic, and intelligent way of carrying himself along with his quirks gave him an appeal to some women, and he was generally successful at dating. His extreme need for validation and increasingly passive aggressive, clingy tendencies meant it was difficult to make his relationships last. He entered a cycle of entering a relationship, bombing out, and then self harming and falling into a mental rut for a period of time after. He always blames himself after romantic failure and maintains strong feelings of regret and fondness for each of his prior flames, refusing to see the problematic elements in his own clingy and desperate behavior. This chasing of deep affection and general alienation and shaky sense of self led Ray to depersonalize to an extent. This caginess in the present day is subtle as Ray projects a disciplined aura of politeness and geniality. Ray has strong barriers and does not let them down easily for fear of what will happen when they do come down.

Over the course of 2024 he became increasingly agitated over the state of America, predicting a Canon win early on. He remained inconsistently motivated to be an activist, due to his mental state distracting him and making him cynical about the difference he could make. His political and ethical concerns remain mostly mental, and do not play out in practice. One promise he made to himself was that he would need to own a gun to be better at practicing solidarity in the face of the rise of American conservatism. He resolved to begin going to ranges on his eighteenth birthday.

Ray, being mostly an indoors sort of person, nowadays only socializes offline to attend concerts. He started heavily supporting the local band scene in the summer before his senior year, especially bands founded by other Red Rocks students. He in particular is a fan of Finest in Niflhel, a band whose membership counts Heather Klein, a romantic partner in junior year who he still is on amicable terms with and personally admires. He has diversified his friends group somewhat due to his concert going.

In his senior year he began a relationship with Vivian Cho, with whom he feels more safe slowly exploring his queerness due to her also openly identifying as queer. He began to feel safe sometimes switching into his femme voice at school. However he refuses to push any further and actively continues to harshly shut down his gender dysphoria, despite Vivian being open to dialogue and herself engaging in non-feminine expression. He has become more open to having an attraction to men despite not acting on it, and came out to his grandparents during his most recent trip to Brazil. They are more kind and friendly to him than his parents, and took him coming out well.

As he promised himself, on his eighteenth birthday Ray invested income from his programming projects to start going to gun ranges at least twice a month. He has average marksmanship but takes gun safety and proper technique seriously. He plans to purchase a gun when he gets his own car, along with getting a concealed carry license. Ray is under no illusions that he can play hero and considers gun ownership solely a precaution.

He has stated plans to attend a school in the UC system and recently was admitted on early admission to UC San Diego for a computer science degree. He has promised to remain in most of his friends' lives. Staying with Vivian in particular influences him to the point that he strongly considers declining admission to any school not close to where she will settle after high school, and he is not shy about stating he hopes to go steady with her.

Advantages: Ray has a strong ability to project strength and stability even when he is not in such a state, and staying superficially rational can help him in bad situations. Ray is trained in the basic operation of firearms and may be able to better aim and handle fundamentals safely.
Disadvantages: Ray has a strong sense of personal ethics and may struggle to take actions needed to survive such as causing harm to others. Ray has a severe degree of internalized self-loathing and alienation that may make him more likely to sabotage his own chances at survival in a passive or active manner. Ray is overweight and notably below average in physical prowess and may have difficulty keeping up with the demands of his situation.